OC Advice needed for a chronic lurker

I've been a chronic lurker on many platforms for my entire life, but the amount I actually contribute on the internet is VERY little. I want to change that, so I thought I'd ask the experts of the internet. What does your engagement with the internet look like? On which platforms, and why? How do you find your communities through the "noise"?

For me personally, I deal with a lot of anxiety sharing myself with internet strangers. I struggle to think anything I would say is valuable, interesting, or hasn't already been said. Any tips on how to grow confidence and trust that my input has merit, or could be useful to someone?

Thanks for any responses. I'm really enjoying kbin and lemmy (came from reddit) and its the first community that I really want to participate in and help further its success.

Briskfall,
Briskfall avatar

Same here! I feel like the problem with Reddit's established community is that most of them have found an "identity" and developed a "lingo" / "jargon" of their own. Like if you're not "innit" then it becomes harder to minge then there's this influx of downvotes making it very hard to wanting to take part without... lurking a shit ton. (like Stack Overflow mentality lol) Feels like threading thin ice sometimes. With a novel community like this one, where rules are yet to be set in stone, it feels... freer?

I mean, it still is very fun to lurk and digesting new content, but starting up posts on your own can also be a lot of fun. There's also a lot of bot/stalker behavior in Reddit which might minimize the incentive to be creative. With the smaller fediverse communities (especially closed/invite-only sign ups) it might be easier? I'm just speculating though...

Anyway, I'm happy that you are feeling more at ease being by posting more, keep it up!

MrTomLegit,
MrTomLegit avatar

I am using this sudden influx of newness to post more as well. Frankly I have nothing but positive interactions so far. I get way more interaction in the fediverse than I ever did on any other platform. All that to say, that I just started responding to random people's posts. Everyone has been friendly.

princeofmar5,

I feel the exact same way. So far I’ve had success responding to posts that are just asking questions that are relevant to me like this one. I’m hoping eventually that’ll lead to me making my own posts, but baby steps.

quinacridone,

Hi I have a similar issue, I'm autistic and can tie myself in knots trying to work out the not-wrong way to interact, to the point where I just give up. So I don't really contribute much at all, however I'm trying to step out of my comfort zone on here and else where. I can also end up editing and re-editing my text so it may come across a bit formal/weird?

The reason why I'm responding to you is that your post resonates with me on a personal level, and I think what you comment is valuable and interesting and useful (not just to me, other quietly, internet lurkers may been here too)

Things are a bit new here for most of us, and I think that's a plus, there doesn't seem to be the pressure to post something 'hilarious'. A lot of posts don't have the enormous, and intimidating comments numbers to get lost in, so it's possible to have a little chat and be on your way

:)

snarsher,

Thanks for being willing to share! I'm grateful for that insight, and to feel like I'm truly not alone. There are many of us anxious pups quietly here on the internet it seems haha. I agree, the newness and true need for good and engaging content makes it much easier to jump in and see what happens :)

B4tid0,
@B4tid0@lemmy.world avatar

Hi! In the same situation.

What helps me is taking baby steps (i share as much as im comfortable and nothing more) and very low expecation, oh and is a huge benefit that the standards in Lemmy don't really exist so that's nice. I also sort by New, which helps me find new post with little to no comments where you can easily interact.

The scariness hasn't gone away for me but I think that's good , getting to comfy on the internet can be a bit dangerous and i mean we are all strangers here so you know , i jusr act accordingly to that.

Right now is encouraged to post , comment and participate as much as you can. A community and network is nothing without engagement from the participants , so i just feel like i am doing my part the best i can even if it isn't the best , at least is something.

As opposed to "read it on reddit" here is more "lemmy post" kind of attitude at the moment. Good luck :)

snarsher,

True, it's always important to not get too comfy here, that's just asking for trouble haha. Sorting by New is a great tip! And allowing myself baby steps, no shame no judgement. Love that.

thirdorbital,

I mostly lurked on Reddit as well. In the large communities, you could predict what the responses would be already and anything that wasn't tailored to what the hive wanted to hear would be buried. And why bother posting your journeyman-level knowledge of a topic when some expert in the field (real or imagined) was surely right behind you?

My advice - find a topic you care about, a hobby you have, and talk about it. Maybe you won't be the best comment on the thread. Who cares? This probably won't be the best reply you get either. If you helped one person out, even a little, wasn't it worth your time?

snarsher,

Love that attitude. And you're right, the large Reddit communities felt like there were so many voices that I couldn't really be bothered to give my "take" when there were already so many takes. So far the interactions here feel more authentic, which I appreciate.

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