@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

Dani

@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net

Yet another birdsite refugee... and now here. WIP, TBD. She/her, trans/lesbian, married dad, mechanical engineer, car girl. HRT 5/2/2022

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Impossible_PhD, to random
@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar

Okay, I'm doing one of those anonymous AMA thingies! I'm using Google Forms instead of that one app, but it's still 100% anonymous, and I'll be checking and posting replies over the course of the day.

Here's the link to ask or say whatever you want: https://forms.gle/hEwv6eU4CQHWqBeF9

The only stuff I won't respond to are:

  1. Questions about what I've got going on with my pelvis.
  2. Anything that's just being mean.

Everything else is on the table, including stuff I wouldn't usually answer. 😉

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD My brain suddenly jumped to a question about hip rotation but I know full well what you meant about 1.

Impossible_PhD, to random
@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar

Part of me wants to do one of those anonymous ask me anything thingies. I'm curious to know the things people want to ask or say, but are too shy/self conscious to ask.

The other part of me is just a smidge bit worried to do it.

Cuz I wonder what people want to ask or say, but are too ahy/self conscious to ask. 🤭

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD I just tend to figure any question I want to ask I'd do publicly or DMs, but... dunno. Never got those things much.

indigotyrian, to random
@indigotyrian@akko.elysium.gay avatar

aaaaaaaaaa my favorite ES writer shared one of my stories :nekomimi_girl_emoji_002:

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@indigotyrian Yay! Who incidentally?

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@indigotyrian Aha! Thus other places. 😅

... a little frustrated at the twitter balkanization stuff; so many social media sites to find where people are posting.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@indigotyrian Sorry, that turned into unrelated complaining instead of just being excited! Long day pretending to be normal for me.

DivineKestrel, to random
@DivineKestrel@chaosfem.tw avatar

Okay, look, I'm not asking for much, here.

A collar, wrist and ankle restraints, maybe a spreader bar if there's one hanging around…

…and a woman's hand… hovering slowly, barely a hair's distance above my vulva.

I mean, is that too much to ask for? Come on!

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@DivineKestrel That seems reasonable!

DivineKestrel, to random
@DivineKestrel@chaosfem.tw avatar

Suzie Plakson as the Klingon K'Ehleyr is so fucking hot.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@DivineKestrel Yeeeees

terraboops, to random
@terraboops@girlcock.club avatar

it's so weird to me that anyone thinks i am attractive in any way

i spent so much of my life hating my body and there is so much inertia behind that

i remember back in September when i first entertained the idea i may be attractive; and people were like "uh yes? you are?" ... and like... i now believe that other people believe this, but it's so incredibly weird to me still

the idea is so foreign that even though i want it to be true i cannot believe it, despite ample evidence it is true

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@terraboops OK I'm going to mention briefly that yes I find you attractive...

But also holy crap so much myself in this post too.

EmilyGB2023, to random
@EmilyGB2023@chaosfem.tw avatar

I can solve some of my problems with "communication" but isn't it far more efficient to pretend i don't have a problem and cry a lot?

Sure feels simpler!

This message has been brought to you by my therapist, who - - no lie - - dropped the Picard face palm gif into chat as a response.

I swear she had to have set up a macro or something.

I love my therapist. She understands that, sometimes, I need that kind of response in addition to all the talking.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@EmilyGB2023 OK but where's the wrong part?

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@EmilyGB2023 pffft.

DivineKestrel, to random
@DivineKestrel@chaosfem.tw avatar

Nothing like a follow request by a dude saying he's looking for a throat to fill and sending a dick closeup. 🤢🤮

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@DivineKestrel ugh

Dani, to random
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

Hmm. Big yearning for bottom correction hours tonight.

Impossible_PhD, to random
@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar

Have you ever wondered what an anime that was the fever-dream love child of Ghost in the Shell and Blade Runner might look like? Especially if it was made at the height of the cyberpunk swell in the mid-90s? And what if it had Big Trans Themes, both transfem and transmasc?

Armitage III is that anime.

And it's available to stream for free from the internet archive.

https://archive.org/details/armitage-iii/Armitage+III+Episode+1.mp4

Dani, (edited )
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD I should see if I already still have it. 🤣

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD Huh, no! Welp.

DivineKestrel, to random
@DivineKestrel@chaosfem.tw avatar

Something I think about sometimes is the difference between us late bloomers and the Trans kids now.

I look around at all the Trans women my age and it's like we're this weird cookie cutter form where the similarities are fucking eerie.

And I think of all the young kids now, and how there might be so much variation in the Trans community with those kids. How I hope none of them will be cookie cut-outs.

The sad truth is when I stop to think about it, I know why all the late blooming Trans girls are the same.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@DivineKestrel Maybe, maybe not. Mulling over similarities here, lots of categories

terraboops, to random
@terraboops@girlcock.club avatar

somatic therapy and cognitive behavioural therapy are like two sides of the same coin for me.

i cannot do one without the other, i am way too good at compartmentalizing and suppressing. i learned that too young; it's automatic.

cognitive behavioural therapy, talk therapy, and exposure therapy can help me to break down the barriers that keep things locked away ... and then embracing somatic therapy to really allow myself to fully feel them will process them...

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@terraboops I find myself curious about somatic therapy but.. well, the "not locking away" parts sound something too for me.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@terraboops "stress just gets trapped and weighs me down" sounds like my method, yeah.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@terraboops Talk therapy stuff but that's going to be a long process; got curious about somatic therapy as it was a new thing I hadn't heard of.

I'm mostly at... repression/disassociation and masking in both directions but alexythimia could be too.

Impossible_PhD, to random
@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar

I just got some really good news.

That presentation I pitched about SGW? For the prestigious panel that's hard to get into at the prestigious conference that's hard to get into?

I got in.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD YEEEEES YES YES YES!!!

terraboops, to random
@terraboops@girlcock.club avatar

PSA: reasons you should consider using and installing Signal:

  • Elon says not to
  • I can share lewd images of myself with you
  • You can share lew images of yourself with me
  • The icon is blue daba dee daba die
  • Girls kissing
  • Boys kissing
  • Entities kissing
  • Cryptic status message features
  • For some reason also cryptocurrency or something??
  • Extremely mid location sharing
  • Yes, you can finally share contact info by username/link
Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@terraboops I mean, if Elon says not to... (I already have it installed)

Impossible_PhD, to trans
@Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar

Coming out is hard, and coming out as trans is even harder. As trans folks, we have to do it in a way pretty much nobody else ever does.

This week on , we're looking at the rhetoric of How To Come Out Anywhere, so you can feel a little more confident when you invite the people you love into a deeper relationship with you.

https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/p/how-to-come-out-anywhere

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD Well. Will see when I get a chance to read this, it feels relevant. 😅

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD OK quickie while I'm reading, but you mentioned rhetoric and the idea that duh there's ways of learning this other than through trial and error and vibes should have occurred to me but didn't.... and are there self-study-able resources you could think of?

I think for me the purpose as you term it is what's held me back from being out in more places than I am, need to have a think about that.

Thank you for writing this, it's providing some mental framework

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD By "this" I meant, thank you for this SGW post providing a rhetorical framework to communicate with people in terms of coming out... I actually don't recall having an education in rhetoric, which I feel sometimes tells. Also some of the components of things you've highlighted are places where I've held back from coming out in some contexts.

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@Impossible_PhD Thank you.

Dani, to random
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

Saw Laura Jane Grace last night and... well. Damn.

That's pretty much the first time I've gone out other than in boymode. Plus meeting friends, plus seeing music from One Of Us.

Well.

Good times, to say the least. And wearing one of my Girl Draws Ghosts shirts there made me smile too... 💜

Dani,
@Dani@mastodon.sandwich.net avatar

@miriamrobern Like, I don't know what pronouns people saw me as - the nice bartender at the lesbian bar treated me like one of the girls and we laughed at my legal name when I closed out my tab, my friends obviously treated me like me... but no stranger made any mention.

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