Dani

indigotyrian, 8 hours ago to random

a good friend of mine just told me “if I saw someone treating another person the way you treat yourself I would punch them in the mouth” and i wish i knew how to process this or be better about it. i wish i knew how to be my own best friend instead of my own worst enemy.

Dani, 12 hours ago to random

Saw Laura Jane Grace last night and... well. Damn.

That's pretty much the first time I've gone out other than in boymode. Plus meeting friends, plus seeing music from One Of Us.

Well.

Good times, to say the least. And wearing one of my Girl Draws Ghosts shirts there made me smile too... 💜

DivineKestrel, 22 hours ago to random

Full depth on orange, bitches!!

#iykyk

Impossible_PhD, 1 day ago to random

I love this dress.

Impossible_PhD, 1 day ago to random

I just heard that the supplemental art book for one of my favorite obscure '90's anime has entered the public archive! EEEEE!

https://archive.org/details/armitage-the-third-visual-file

Impossible_PhD, 1 day ago to random

A trans friend of mine with expander implants just passed a big milestone for her, and... damn, that's just cool that we can just do these sorts of things. And that I get to know people who are realizing their dreams in this way. 🥰

Also--and remember that this is coming from me--goddamn, Zeni has really big boobs.

Dani, 2 days ago to random

Hm; I think A Problem I've realized is I don't really know how to work my brain gently. I don't know how to self soothe other than repressing and or disassociation, I don't know how to motivate myself other than last minute panic or inwardly directed rage... it goes on but you get the gist.

I'm sitting here trying to steer things by (figuratively) hitting it with hammers and OK yeah it works but it hurts and it breaks stuff and I'm tired.

Dani, 2 days ago to random

Ugh, therapy... what, you mean self hatred and disassociation might be part of a self reinforcing cycle? That I might have more feelings if I learn to trust myself to not feel bad about having them?

Ugggggggh.

terraboops, 3 days ago to random

my fortress of self loathing is crumbling under the weight of love in my life this year

i spent a lifetime building that fortress
brick by brick
walls of judgement
windows of despair

the task handed down to me; a family tradition
eventually i learned to recruit help
new perspectives to generate new judgements
new fires to stoke my anxiety

i learned to forget i had needs at all

for 9 months i have taken a fucking wrecking ball of joy to this fortress
the last remnants are crumbling to sand.

DivineKestrel, 3 days ago to random

@amye there are few people I know who would understand this, but you will.

I just had an interview with Oregon DEQ about an application architect position in water quality. It's a big project they are working on. At the end of the interview they asked if I had questions and I said I wanted a detailed description of the project.

Remember Hydrasi? The company I tried to build to make environmental data open and accessible? Amye… they are building Hydrasi!

I almost started crying. I still dream of that becoming a reality.

I thought I wanted this job before. But now I very desperately need this job!

indigotyrian, 3 days ago to random

is it normal to break down sobbing and crying while doing your morning grooming routine

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

The person who's no longer my CEO as of yesterday wants to have a zoom meeting with me to discuss the job and thank me for my time.

When I was told I was laid off, I was told my last day on payroll was technically yesterday.

So the meeting where I was told I was laid off was unpaid time.

And now the CEO wants to meet with me to …what? Assuage his guilt? On unpaid time?

This is the kind on entitlement I fucking hate so much about tech.

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

Welcome to the world of the unemployed, I guess.

terraboops, 4 days ago to random

my cis female nesting partner has never once had her estradiol levels tested and she's been to doctors about chronic health issues for almost a decade.

imagine being a trans woman and never having your hormone levels checked.

honestly, this is one of the ways that cisnormativity likely hurts cis people; she should have had her levels checked years ago!

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

Thinking about going to a women-only BDSM/leather casual munch event. I Just want to meet some people in person. But trying to talk myself into it is surprisingly terrifying.

terraboops, 4 days ago to random

LB: don't mistake my flirting for kindness 😽❤️

Impossible_PhD, 5 days ago to trans

I have never before in my life read or felt seen as deeply by a feminism like that from A Short History of Trans Misogyny, and this week on #StainedGlassWoman, we're diving deep into mujerísima to understand exactly why Jules Gill-Peterson's work truly is A Love Letter To The Dolls unlike anything I've ever encountered before.

#trans #MtF #nonbinary #TransJoy #Feminism

https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/p/a-love-letter-to-the-dolls