DivineKestrel

DivineKestrel, 23 hours ago to random

Transition turning point.

I was pretty hell bent already, life was falling apart. I couldn't come back from COVID because being home with the kids all day was too amazing. I knew I wanted to be a mom and couldn't because…well, I'm a man. There were a lot of things pushing me but I knew I had to suck it up and just be a good dad.

Then one day, a group of the men from my church approached me and said they wanted me to join them for coffee on Saturday, which they do every week, calling it The Old Men Coffee Club.

I almost vomited.

I was forced to be a man, but I didn't want to be… that. Just picturing being in a group of old men made me sick to my stomach.

DivineKestrel, 2 days ago to random

I'm honestly convinced that estrogen has made me more scatterbrained.

DivineKestrel, 3 days ago to random

So, my original vaginoplasty consult was with OHSU, which is an amazing hospital and where I wanted to go. But the consult was in two months.

On a whim, I decided to set a consult with another doctor. I now have a vagina two months before the original consult.

Just as a point of reference people: A 20 month wait for a consult and another 20+ month surgery wait was avoided by looking around.

This falls into the "It can't hurt to look around" category.

DivineKestrel, 3 days ago to random

*On the phone with the VA, using the femme voice that gets coded femme by people who don't know me.

"Can we have the veterans name."

"Okay, the name you have on file is – but my name is Terra. I'm trying to update my name and sex on record, that's why I'm calling."

"I see your record now. What can we do for you today, sir?"

"Well, it's ma'am."

"Ma'am, yes, I'm sorry about that sir."

"I'm not a sir. Can you confirm that you have the paperwork I sent to update my record."

"Give me one moment to check that sir."

"Ma'am."

"Yes, of course, just one moment…"

*Fast forward 10 minutes, where they say they have everything, but are 'working on it,' so I can't get updated docs. 🤦‍♀️​

"Is there anything else I can help you with, sir?"

"OMG I'm not a sir, no."

"Thank you for calling the VA, sir, have a nice day."

…

*Terra throws a table into the wall

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

The Oregon Employement Department not only denied my medical leave claim because of a paperwork error they made, now they denied my unemployment benefits because of an issue they won't even show me. I fucking hate them so much right now.

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

"Way too much blood!"

*BUZZZ

"Terra"

"What is coming out of my vagina?"

"That is correct."

"I'll take 'things I never thought I'd say' for $800"

*SIRENS

"And that is the daily double"

…

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

If you are in management in any public agency anywhere, I urge you to research your current public records laws before installing Windows 11. Because that is absolutely terrifying from a public records perspective.

https://arstechnica.com/gadgets/2024/05/microsofts-new-recall-feature-will-record-everything-you-do-on-your-pc/

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

You know the management book I want to read? I've never seen it. The title would be something like "Hug your team" and it would be a feminine view of your team as a teacher helping their class of children succeed.

"Embrace the suck" is a shitty message to hear from a manager.

"How can I help you be happy" is the message we should be sending.

DivineKestrel, 4 days ago to random

I love thinking about what @kelidanovus is doing right now.

…well… not what she's doing right now, because that's just sleeping. But…

It makes me so happy…

DivineKestrel, 5 days ago to random

Trans folk,

Have you had a one-on-one meeting/dinner/coffee/whatever with a cis friend from prior to your transition where that meeting was NOT primarily focused on you explaining yourself and your transition?

I'm trying to think of one. And I can't. I can't think of a single one.

DivineKestrel, 6 days ago to random

My surgeon: your vagina will not be self lubricating, don't expect any moisture.

My vagina: 🌊🌊🌊

DivineKestrel, 6 days ago to random

I still can't believe I walked into a hospital, took off my clothes, laid down on a bed, went to sleep, woke up with no dick, got out of bed, put my clothes on, and walked out of the hospital with a full-on vagina.

What the actual…

DivineKestrel, 8 days ago to random

Cis woman who has not seen me in several months:

Terra… Wow… I mean… you look… great! Just wow.

(This was not ironic. It was heartfelt and legitimate enough I kind of wonder if she's bi.)

🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

DivineKestrel, 8 days ago to random

Okay, look, I'm not asking for much, here.

A collar, wrist and ankle restraints, maybe a spreader bar if there's one hanging around…

…and a woman's hand… hovering slowly, barely a hair's distance above my vulva.

I mean, is that too much to ask for? Come on!

DivineKestrel, 9 days ago to random

Have you tried unplugging me and then plugging me again?

DivineKestrel, 9 days ago to random

Suzie Plakson as the Klingon K'Ehleyr is so fucking hot.

DivineKestrel, 9 days ago to random

Child: Some of this asparagus is good!

Mom: The tops are better than the bottoms and the skinny ones are better than the fat ones. So it'd be perfect to only eat the skinny tops.

Me: Things would be perfect if I could eat all the fat bottoms.

Mom: Terra…

Me: Sorry.

DivineKestrel, 9 days ago to random

I hate Q so much.

DivineKestrel, 10 days ago to random

I don't know who needs to hear this, but Deanna Tori had a perfect waist mainly because Marina Sirtis wore a corset.

It's me. I need to hear this.

DivineKestrel, 9 days ago to random

I forgot it was Q who first threw the Enterprise into The Borg. God I hate that fucking abusive, narcissistic asshole.

DivineKestrel, 11 days ago to random

Every time I make a joke here where I word the joke the way I would around other Black folk, there is a white person who drops into my mentions to condemn it. Every single time. I'm only safe as long as I code switch.

And the thing is, I know not to engage them on this topic because the easiest way for a Black person to get attacked is to call a white liberal out on racist behaviors. I've been around this chestnut way too damn long. I got decades as a published author dealing with that chestnut. It's not worth it.

When we say Mastodon has a race problem, we are not talking about the Nazis.

DivineKestrel, 11 days ago to random

Something I think about sometimes is the difference between us late bloomers and the Trans kids now.

I look around at all the Trans women my age and it's like we're this weird cookie cutter form where the similarities are fucking eerie.

And I think of all the young kids now, and how there might be so much variation in the Trans community with those kids. How I hope none of them will be cookie cut-outs.

The sad truth is when I stop to think about it, I know why all the late blooming Trans girls are the same.

DivineKestrel, 11 days ago to random

Nothing like a follow request by a dude saying he's looking for a throat to fill and sending a dick closeup. 🤢🤮

DivineKestrel, 12 days ago to random

Looking for jobs right now is fucking wild, because all the tech jobs are hiring at the same salary as they were 13 years ago when I started working in software. This was back when the boring ass Oregon state jobs paid so little by comparison.

But Oregon state has tied their salaries to inflation and living wages and given cost of living adjustments (COLAs). So now, the boring ass state jobs pay more than the private company jobs.

The software industry laughs at COLAs, but we've been taking pay cuts every single year. If I'd just have stayed at DEQ working as a hydrologist, I'd be making considerable more than a senior software developer. That's wild.

DivineKestrel, 13 days ago to random

There are so many characters whose entire persona is the source of comedy, who are there because their very existence is what's funny.

Men with the characteristics of women.

Them being women-like or identified as such is what makes them gross, ridiculous, laughable. Characters like John Dorian from Scrubs and Lt. Boyle from Brooklyn 99.

The wild thing—the telling thing—is that most of them, perhaps all of them, could be played straight.

If the audience saw the characters as genuine closeted Trans femmes, the entire presentation would be a stark and very painful commentary on how hard it is to survive as a Trans femme. How every natural inclination we have is ridiculed and condemned.

Every time, the writing still works. And the whole series would become a way to show fucking horrible society is to us just for existing.

Cis people: Just sit for a while with that.