Lucia

Lucia, 5 hours ago to random

If you are considering following me, or even if you're not, you should just do it, because I'm like the manic pixie dream girl who got bit by a vampire with rabies then "accidentally" ate a huge bag of shrooms and had a bad trip.

I'm the kinda taste you didn't even know you wanted to acquire, and im pretty sure theres only one of me.

Just facts.

Apparently I'm on my shit again too 😂

(DONT ACTUALLY FOLLOW ME, YOU WILL REGRET IT, SERIOUSLY THO)

Lucia, 1 day ago to trans

Trans Agenda: Posting Selfies to Social Media lol

Kinda feeling OK today despite forgetting my meds by several hours.

I'm freshly 45, earning my silver hairs by now. Things could be better, but also they could be worse. Somehow I squeezed out a rare smile that doesn't look forced.

#Trans

Lucia, 2 days ago to random

I'm the lesbian with the red Subaru archetype. This makes my giggle inside a little.

Lucia, 3 days ago to random

The best thing about Linux is that it guarantees you will never have to wait on phone line for Windows customer support ever again 😂

Just enter your problem in your browser and it has probably already been solved and explained by a bunch of nerds on a forum somewhere who are getting impatient about solving such mundane problems for us less experienced folx.

But... Back before smartphones were invented (unless you count Blackberry) and my problem was no internet connectivity, solving problems was much harder lol.

Lucia, 3 days ago to random

I hate that I used to feel smart and now I feel pretty inept and occasionally just dumb regarding most things. I used to know SO much, but the combination of not using old knowledge, and worse, some level of cognitive decline due to years of undiagnosed and misdiagnosed issues, has left me feeling like I've lost a significant part of my intelligence.

Lucia, 11 days ago to random

Had a person reply to a week+ old post about a psychosis trigger by quoting something I said in the post, then basically saying all Americans are psychotic because of politics citing a wikipedia article out of context with what I was saying? Idk, I don't understand why they did that. Anyways. I went back to look at it and block the person and the post was gone, which is always weird because then I question if I actually saw it or not, which makes me feel like they are teying to fuck with mynhead. Their bio also said all us citizens are not real humans, ad if we are all psychotic monsters?

Fortunately I found the person, and they must have deleted the post because it's completely gone.

Lucia, 15 days ago to random

I have turned 45 today. I honestly don't super care about my birthday, but I feel some sort of cosmic obligation to at least acknowledge it. Today will literally be no different from any other day, other than my age number has ticked up by one.

Lucia, 16 days ago to random

Got a "Happy Mother's Day" from my daughter 💕

Lucia, 17 days ago to random

My phones flashback feature:

"Looks like you need a reminder of some traumatizing shit, so here you go!"

Like what the fuck even is a story with photos of me moving from safe and secure house to single wide to 28 foot camper trailer? And each move represents loss, stress, poor mental health, basically an ongoing living nightmare that never seems to stop.

No, I'm fine, there is obviously no trauma involved.

Lucia, 17 days ago to random

If I were found mummified in an ancient tomb there would be jars of pickles everywhere.

Lucia, 18 days ago to random

A pickle is literally an embalmed cucumber. Little veggie corpses.

Lucia, 18 days ago to trans

Can hear my cousins husband chatter with his little kids as they feed and water the pigs a ways off from my camper, through my open window. They all knew me as Deadname.

Anyways, the 6yo is telling dad about how Lucía showed them a garter snake and a blue tailed skink living under a board, and how I told them to look but don't try to catch the lizard because it will easily lose it's tail, and this leaves them vulnerable. I hear them all talking about Lucía and "she", and it's so nice that they are doing this even when I'm not around, not visible or visually within earshot.

#Trans

Lucia, 20 days ago to random

Seriously, please CW your politics posts. Also please don't @ me about filters.

Lucia, 21 days ago to random

I've considered myself gray ace for a while now, but also I feel like other ace folks look like horny sex goblins compared to me 😂 And then allo folks? I must be so boring to everybody. I don't play flirt like all the other girls, and on top of that, I wouldn't know flirting if it slapped me in the mouth and screamed at me. Unless it is of course packaged and labeled. If in fact any human has ever flirted with me, I would clock it as, "Jeez, they sure are nice to me!"

Thoughts brought to you by My Feed™️

Lucia, 22 days ago to random

Is there a way to make my cat stop sprinting out of the cat box across all surfaces in her path with her grimy litter feet to the opposite end of my home? NO, because you can't make a cat do shit.

Lucia, 26 days ago to random

Does anyone remember what the inside of a library looks like? /j

Lucia, 27 days ago to random

Surprisingly I feel like a cute bat today, so I shall preserve that sensation by NOT taking a selfie lol. Sure path to ruining the feels the way my brain is lately.

Lucia, 1 month ago to random

Feeling the darkness starting to settle in. I hope I'm wrong, but I'm usually not.

Lucia, 1 month ago to random

I don't understand how people love rhubarb so much. Cooked, it tastes like squishy nostalgia and desperation with a squeeze of lemon.

Lucia, 1 month ago to random

Tried to take selfie, felt ugly, then dropped phone in cat water. A sign

Lucia, 1 month ago to random

I'm the Craigslist seller your mother warned you about. Bats spread rabies.

(Awaiting a buyer to pick up my rabbit cages I no longer use)

Lucia, 1 month ago to mentalhealth

Well, today I slept til about 9am which is super late for me. Then about 30 mins later fell back asleep til around 11. This is after staying in bed all day yesterday playing my ps5, which I'm also doing today.

Needless to say this is outside of my norm of waking up around 7am. My head feels fucked, and I just can't use any brain function aside from vegetation via game. I tried talking to my aunt about what's going on with my head. but couldn't verbally articulate my thoughts well enough to be of any help to her with regards to helping me (that was last night after a full day of being out of home base, very exhausted).

I've discussed this quite a bit with my therapist, with regards to getting med adjustment via a couple day inpatient visit to a local behavioral health facility here in town. This is supposed to be the next step if my prn med doesn't help, otherwise this could go on for weeks or months.

If course rest and isolation from stressors is right up there in importance with the prn med. I'm kinda OK just doing nothing in a zero stimulus environment, but leaving my cave as I've had to do a few times in past few days, has made things worse.

The problem is that I have been affected by the stress from my moving and living situation, and have been working outside my comfort zone with my aunt to get my finances and life in order. I'd legit be homeless in addition to broke if she wasn't helping me, but it's taking its toll.

My aunt is now on a joint checking and savings account with me, and is fully managing it for me. I will also be canceling my credit cards. I have to tell her about literally every dollar I spend, and for the first time since divorce I'm on a budget.

Anyways, the latter bit about my finances, that's a big part of my stress and current mental and emotional degradation, and it's not going to just go away.

#MentalHealth #MentalIllness #Schizoaffective #Schizophrenia #Bipolar

Lucia, 1 month ago to mentalhealth

Sometimes when I'm in Standby Mode™️ I want to post about why I'm not posting. But actually it's boring af. I'm not feeling "right" currently, but also can't put my finger on what it is I'm experiencing rn.

#MentalHealth #MentalIllness

Lucia, 1 month ago to trans

At one of my many stops yesterday I needed to change name, address, and gender. Was working either a very nice lady who had been with the business for 18 years and had never done it before, nor had she known of anybody who had done it.

At no point did she make me feel like I was an inconvenience despite being very busy and very short staffed and her needing to check with her manager a few times. Also, there were several technology fails as she tried to access and change my info in the antiquated database. I provided her with bountiful patience and she provided me with a pleasant experience.

#Trans

Lucia, 1 month ago to random

In the past couple weeks I've had surprise:

$1300 water heater repair
$1400 payment after closing of home sale because s
they fucked up in closing
$3300 I owe to IRS

This was supposed to be what I live off of for several months while I wait on disability. I have no money.