gknauss

gknauss, 11 hours ago to random

Perhaps, sir, you’d find a more receptive audience for your message IF YOU WEREN’T ON A BIKE PATH, YA FRIGGIN’ MAROON.

gknauss, 1 day ago to random

When questioned why a Confederate battle flag flew over his house for a week in 2023, Justice Alito said, “That was my son.”

And the flag of Nazi Germany that was up for a day at the start of 2024? “The dog.”

“And the Pepe flag that is going up for a couple of weeks in September is an innocent mistake,” he added.

gknauss, 1 day ago to random

Honestly, I’m not even going to be surprised next week when we learn that Kavanaugh’s wife is Alina Habba.

Sure! Why not? Maybe Amy Coney Barrett is married to the corpse of Ashli Babbitt. Or Gorsuch has a common-law relationship with the abstract notion of “insurrection.”

That’s the way it works now. Nothing matters. There are no consequences. There is no office too high to debase, no ideal too important to sacrifice.

Alito’s “14/88” face tattoo is brought to you by My Pillow.

gknauss, 2 days ago to random

Every company that feeds their user’s data into an LLM — Slack and Reddit are today’s examples — is powering the GPUs by burning good will.

gknauss, 2 days ago to random

It occurs to me that “Boomer Neutering Day” is also, hopefully, what we’ll be able to call Election Day.
https://mastodon.social/@gknauss/112451457061240655

gknauss, 2 days ago to random

Sure, sex is great, but have you ever deleted a local branch after its PR gets accepted and merged into main?

I mean, seriously, have you? Can you tell me what it’s like?

gknauss, 3 days ago to random

The rise of AI in parallel with the pending election of a fascist?

We’re living in “A Mind Forever Voyaging.”

Someone save game, quick, just in case.

gknauss, 3 days ago to random

Satan appears to Mike Johnson in 2014.

Satan: I can arrange it so that in ten years you’ll be Speaker of the House.

Johnson: Oh, wow. OK. What would I need to do in return?

Satan: You’ll need to stand in front of a Manhattan courthouse and denigrate the American judicial system in order to defend Donald Trump from charges that he paid hush money to a porn star.

Johnson: Ooookay.

Satan: To help make him President.

Johnson: What?

Satan: Again.

Johnson: …

Satan: …

Johnson: Deal.

gknauss, 5 days ago to random

I was feeling kinda bad, so I had a big bowl Texas chili and cornbread and lemonade for breakfast, and now I still feel kinda bad.

I don’t get it.

gknauss, 8 days ago to random

More like aurora bore-alis! Eh? Eh?

…

Goddammit, nothing cool ever happens here.

gknauss, 9 days ago to random

Apple will mitigate the environmental damage that results from its pending AI products by… not including stickers with new iPads.

This is actually an industry-leading effort.

gknauss, 10 days ago to random

My dearest Martha,

I am afeared the battle is lost. The enemy advances without mercy or pause, and all our most strenuous efforts to staunch the onslaught have been brushed aside. They are relentless.

We retreat to the backyard and hope to make a stand there.

gknauss, 12 days ago to random

I donated blood without passing out and cracking my skull open again!

That’s probably shouldn’t feel like such a significant accomplishment.

gknauss, 17 days ago to random

It probably means something important that I keep spelling it “DevOops.”

mathowie, 18 days ago to random

The Beekeeper with Jason Statham is a kickass nerd flick.

I avoided it for weeks until someone told me it was John Wick but instead of Russian mobsters, he kills phone scammers and blows up call centers that rip people off.

As someone that has had to explain to my own dad many times that Microsoft and Amazon and Apple aren’t really calling him and reminding him to never pay for anything on a call he didn’t place himself, I enjoyed The Beekeeper as the nerd fantasy film it truly is.

gknauss, 18 days ago to random

BEE DELAY!

gknauss, 19 days ago to random

This is Boomer. We’re fostering him until the rescue can find him a permanent home.

We raised three boys, so we’re used to how he eats.

gknauss, 25 days ago to random

The Presidency mainly consists of sitting at a desk, paying attention, and making prudent decisions.

Watching Trump in court is a small peak into how he well handles those particular challenges.

gknauss, 25 days ago to random

Borrowed my kid’s car last night, and brought it back with the seat moved, the mirror adjusted, the radio station and climate settings changed, and no gas.

I have my revenge!

gknauss, 27 days ago to random

So I’m at a bowling alley in Tarzana, in the bar, at a… Prince tribute.

Because nothing says “Prince” like a Tarzana bowling alley.