wolfsbruder

wolfsbruder, 5 months ago to random

A small rant about how words mean things, apropos of current discourse:

"Zionism" means simply "Jewish nationalism." The idea, unthinkable for centuries, that Jews are a people, like any other, like the French, the Irish, the Sri Lankans, equal in dignity and the right to self-governance.

Zionism does NOT mean hatred of non-Jews, any more than "Black lives matter" means, other lives don't. It doesn't imply approval of all policies of the state of Israel or all warfare conducted by that country. Most of all, it does not mean some kind of imperialist aspiration. Israel, a country of 10 million people with no natural resources to speak of, is not trying to build an empire. You can tell that by how, despite military superiority, it has not attempted to conquer its neighbours. Not even after said neighbours tried to destroy it repeatedly.

/1

wolfsbruder, 6 months ago to random

Well fuck, yestreday I work up to find

My shabbos candles are gone, my kiddush cup, my havdallah set, my shtender, my sidur, all my mussar texts, all of my talis katan, and kippot, benchers, all my chasidic texts. everything...

I'm glad I keep my tzaydi's sidur hidden along with my tefillin and talis gadol.

all my judaica gone.

the candlesticks and the neronim glass, and my kiddush cup are irreplacable.

Asking someone why the fuck they came into my home and did this led to yet another fucking row.

Today boichik let me know he might be able to atleast recover my candlesticks, glass, and cup. he said his Eema felt she deserved them and that by all rights they belonged to her anyway. (did I mention he recovered the restraining pins to my shower chair? ok he stole them from her, but still)

as far as everything else he said she pitched them into a garbage skip. so recovering my havdalah set is a no go :(

I fucking hate my life.

wolfsbruder, 4 months ago to random

So my heart and lung specialist and my rheumatologist have told me [and I shall politely paraphrase] that "moving to Bellingham is the dumbest fucking thing you could possibly do, with your lack of transportation and their lack of services, compounded with the distance to Seattle. What you are talking about is tantamount to suicide.

You are jewish. Have you forgotten the care you will not get from St. Jo's Hospital up there? They will let you die if anything happens. There are still ongoing lawsuits over their treatment of non-Catholics or Christians in general."

Gee, thanks, way to make me feel supported here.

wolfsbruder, 2 months ago to random

I want to scream. My 11 yro child has informed me that I will not make the same dish for lunch or dinner within 16 days, if I do he will not eat it.

And when I told him we can't afford that, he has had (is having) a screaming and abusive meltdown about me guilt-tripping him because I just don't want to meet what he views as his personal requirements.

G-d where did he come up with this logic.

wolfsbruder, 3 months ago to random

Oh fuck my life.

I just recievecd a letter from SSA stating they have suspended my disability income and medicare (and thus boichik's too). I am under auditor fraud because I have been reported as having lied about having employment even before I applied for disability to current day, and I may need to pay all my visibility back.

Boichiks eema is gloating over having been the one to file the report to SSA, SHA/HUD, the LEAP program for energy assistance, and to the cable company (low income assistance for internet). and is praying I lose all assistance.

SCREAM

FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK

G-D DAMN ALL THIS FUCKING PETTINESS

I am going to bounce rent on Monday, and all utilities. and she is is still demanding I pay on one of her credit cards.

not to mention food for boichik and I.

FUUUUCKKKKK

hate does not even begin to describe what i feel right now, besides absolute crippling panic and fear.

I haven't had an actual job since 2008 and it took over a decade to get disabilitty.

/1

wolfsbruder, 3 months ago to random

wheee....

I just received a letter; I need to renew my SHA paperwork because there are discrepancies that were brought to their attention.

She is now well past being fucking petty.

My SSI is suspended pending an audit, because of the same person.,and now my housing assistance is now in jeopardy.

I have no safety net whatsoever, unlike her.

I swear she is trying to cause my death

And boichik is the one who is suffering, and is going to suffer over all of this.

This is why I have been pushing myself to stream DJ sets, we need the help.

Streaming music is something practical I can do, when my health lets me, and hope for donations to keep boichik and I afloat.

To be honest, I hate my life right now.

We are drowning, not even trading water anymore.

wolfsbruder, 19 days ago to random

I can see why Israel rejected the final offer. The release of murderers from prison and the consequent solidification of Hamas's leadership are bad enough, but since when is the winning side in a defensive war expected to pay reparations to rebuild the aggressor without even a regime change? Imagine if WWII had ended with the Allies pouring all that money into Berlin without any alliance and propping up Donitz as Fuehrer.

This is all especially disturbing, when you consider that literally the only consideration offered by Hamas was the release of civilian hostages seized in peacetime. No reparations to the hostages or to the families of the civilians murdered on October 7th, no dismantling of military infrastructure--not even a commitment for Hamas to cease its own military operations (missile attacks on civilian populations) while Israel withdraws. All they're prepared to commit to is to stop holding some of their kidnapping victims. That's one helluva ransom demand.

<link is next>

wolfsbruder, 7 months ago to random

So regarding the fucking over from the landlord. on top of the exhorbanent extra fees they hit me with from last month.

I have always been allowed to build a suhhak. This year they tore it down and slapped me with a $250.00 maintenance cleanup fee for something I am not approved to have because its a religious display.

at the same time they disposed of my mezuzah for the same reason and hit me with another %250 for damages to the property with a religious display.

I will bet everything I own that they will again put up Christmas shit again this year and allow the tenants to display Christmas shit again.

wolfsbruder, 1 month ago to random

So my secular birthday is Friday, I feel so blah about it.

Dunno what to do

wolfsbruder, 6 months ago to random

joy always tempered by sorrow.

File under I hate my landlord.

My disability came in at 2 am. and my landlord emptied my bank account.

Why? they claim the SHA hasn't paid them in two months, Which from my end I can clearly see SHA did indeed pay its portion.

and they are telling me to 'take it up with SHE'

uhhh.... I don't get to eat this month or feed my kid, WTF?!?

FML

wolfsbruder, 1 day ago to random

woohoo....
I will owe child support/

They can't take more than 50% of my SSI, but the court starts at 30% and determines if I will pay more from there!!

I am so fucked.

I am trying hard not to panic right now. No matter what, I won't be able to afford a place to live, even with Sec-8 and enough food to eat. or the med supplies I need to pay out of pocket for.

wolfsbruder, 1 month ago to random

Shit, a good Tamagoyaki pan that is actually made of cast iron starts at $50.

So much for that idea.

wolfsbruder, 3 months ago to random

Ok, let's try this again.

I am live on twitch, spinning music and fundraising

twitch.tv/wulfsbruder

wolfsbruder, 2 months ago to random

So over on reddit there is a discussion of HoA's being evil.

So, some of you know what city I live in.

In the 1990's the HoA seized and sold the house I was renting out from under the owner.

In the Title deed to the property and the HoA by-laws, "No n*****s, c*s, or ks". The were written in the 1950's.

Racial epitaphs for African Americans, Asians, or Jews

The HoA eventually (2 years in) found out I was Jewish, you would think the mezuzah would have been a giveaway, but I digress.

According to the court, what they did was perfectly legal because the language was grandfathered into the documents.

Racist AF. the HoA was all old white men, the lovely old woman who was renting to us was a snowbird. She went bankrupt fighting it.

Lovely allegedly "liberal" city I live in.

wolfsbruder, 7 months ago to random

so, i am finally calm enough and my kid is calm enough for him the lay down. There was a drive-by shooting today that put his school on lockdown.

Yes people were shot and had to go to Harborview.

edited to state that no one at the school itself were shot.

wolfsbruder, 1 month ago to random

I miss having cats. I have just realized, that after boichik has gone, I will be able to have cats again. With his Eema's severe allergies to cat's and boichik aversion to... shall we say ejected materia...

It may help filla void. and hopefully if and when I AM able to to B'ham, boichik can find a way to connect with me.

I still hate my life, and what is happening.

wolfsbruder, 1 month ago to random

A rabbi was asked by one of his students “Why did God create atheists?” After a long pause, the rabbi finally responded with a soft but sincere voice. “God created atheists” he said, “to teach us the most important lesson of them all – the lesson of true compassion. You see, when an atheist performs an act of charity, visits someone who is sick, helps someone in need, and cares for the world, he is not doing so because of some religious teaching. He does not believe that God commanded him to perform this act. In fact, he does not believe in God at all, so his actions are based on his sense of morality. Look at the kindness he bestows on others simply because he feels it to be right. When someone reaches out to you for help. You should never say ‘I’ll pray that God will help you.’ Instead, for that moment, you should become an atheist – imagine there is no God who could help, and say ‘I will help you’.”

— Martin Buber, “Tales of the Hasidim”

wolfsbruder, 7 months ago to random

Landlord: "You will be paying to have the building power washed and detagged, and you will be paying for the replacement and labor on the living room window in unit X, as someone thought it was your unit."

Me: "I what?!"

Landlord: "You were warned what the consequences would be if it happened again."

Me: "You know this is ileagal, right?"

Landlord: "You say that so often. Do you actually believe you know what the laws are?"

Me: "Uh yes. got a copy of the Tenant-Landlord laws right here, what me to quote them?"

Landlord: "You do know you can't fight this right? And where would you and your son be if you tried? Oh right, homeless and living on the street."

wolfsbruder, 1 month ago to random

Dear G-d, the amount of dogpiling I am getting online for being jewish and supporting Israel [and not Hamas or Iran].

I am seriously disliking a lot of Americans today and, well, most of the world.

And,neither FB or Twitter will do anything about it, of course; they know where their money comes from.

wolfsbruder, 1 month ago to random

Well shit.

The lawyer for boichik's Eema sent me notification of a summary judgment before the divorce, As of June 24th I will no longer have custody.

Boichik, needless to say, is a screaming mess.

and I am not happy either.

wolfsbruder, 1 month ago to random

emotionally feel like shit today.

feel like I am toxic and have destroyed the lives of everyone I have ever cared about, or been involved with.

wolfsbruder, 27 days ago to random

So, yeah... a few people in my PTSD support group called me out for my overaction to other people's antisemitism in the group.

Telling someone that they are overreacting to someone abusing them is worse than blatant antisemitism. It enables the abuser.

FUCK THAT NOISE.

wolfsbruder, 22 days ago to random

Well, with all the stress of everything that's been happening My health has suffered a serious setback. It has collapsed and I am bedbound and barely functional

wolfsbruder, 2 months ago to random

I have to admit, setting up an escrow account for my rent was a really good idea.

I can't get screwed over beyond just an overdraft

wolfsbruder, 18 days ago to mecfs

#mecfs #fibromyalgia #CFS #PEM #POTS

<rant>

So I need to make more space and lose more of my own living space to move the AC so that the temp differential doesn't kill the TV that I can not afford to replace.

I needed to get spoons to get up and do this, as I am bed-bound.

My 11 yro is angry that I am not doing what he wants, and would not let me do what I needed to get spoons, he stole my spons.

And now he is livid at me, because I have less spoons than I started the day with, I can't do now, hell I can't even eat now.

And he is screaming at me blaming me for not doing what needed to be done so he could get what he wanted in the first place.

I am so exhausted and overheating with my meds; if I overheat, bad things happen.

And he just doesn't get it.

As far as he is concerned, it's all my fault that his day and plans, which he never shared, to begin with, are ruined.

</rant>