@xinicit@floe.earth
@xinicit@floe.earth avatar

xinicit

@xinicit@floe.earth

#Sober guy living outside of the Greater #Houston Area. I still miss Rock 101.
Avatar: A ghost wearing sunglasses. It looks rad as hell. Header: An illustration of a fictional cat named Princess Donut. She is wearing a tiara. https://justmytoots.com/xinicit@floe.earth

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mishellbaker, to random
@mishellbaker@wandering.shop avatar

My apartment has been more full of bugs than usual, so this morning I yelled DO YOUR JOB at the spider in my bathtub.

xinicit,
@xinicit@floe.earth avatar

@mishellbaker Bathtub spiders really let themselves go once they come up in the world. Gotta get a lamp shade spider. Those guys get stuff done!

adhdeanasl, to random
@adhdeanasl@beige.party avatar

Just gonna be honest here: To hell with bluesky; I’m at my social media limit. If Mastodon tanks, I’m going back to writing my jokes in bus station toilet stalls.

xinicit,
@xinicit@floe.earth avatar

@adhdeanasl

xinicit, to random
@xinicit@floe.earth avatar

Me: screams into void
Void: So, here’s the thing… I only said you could scream into me because I was trying to be nice. I didn’t think you’d, you know, actually do it.

WillRobinson, to random

Not From The Onion...

Russia's foreign minister joins Tucker Carlson's Kremlin fanbase, blasting the TV host's ousting as an offense to freedom of speech

"The First Amendment of the United States Constitution apparently means nothing in practice," Lavrov said. The First Amendment does not protect journalists from being fired by their employers." - Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov

https://www.businessinsider.com/russian-foreign-minister-asks-why-tucker-carlson-ousted-from-fox-2023-4

xinicit,
@xinicit@floe.earth avatar

@WillRobinson “The first amendment does not protect journalists from being fired by their employers.”

Um… yeah. It’s supposed to protect you from government persecution, not shield you from the consequences of being an asshole.

emilygorcenski, to random

deleted_by_author

    •
    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    @emilygorcenski I said something nice about hachyderm users, so the instance imploded. ¯_(ツ)_/¯ I’m like if Midas were a farmer, and everything he touched turned to manure.

    xinicit, to random
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    You too can develop powerful glutes with this new exercise: hanging onto the edge of the bed with your butt cheeks while the dog dominates the mattress and looks at you like you’re the asshole here!

    MariaTheMartian, to random

    Calckey has electrolytes!
    ✨ ✨ ✨ 😺 ✨✨

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    @MariaTheMartian Calckey has what plants crave!

    xinicit, to random
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    A thread of phrases that give me the GOOD BRAIN JUICE:

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    The woods are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep.

    xinicit,
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    Everybody wanna be a gangster until it’s time to do gangster shit.

    xinicit,
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    It’s not a sex thing

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    Your heart is a muscle the size of your fist

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    If I could live my life all over
    It wouldn’t matter anyway
    ‘Cause I never could stay sober
    On that Corpus Christi Bay

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    When you punish a person for dreaming his dream
    Don’t expect him to thank or forgive you

    xinicit,
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    The birds still sing when they fall from the sky

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    The funny thing is, when you don’t let people disrespect you, they start calling you difficult.

    xinicit,
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    If you can’t handle me at my worst, just remember that I handle me at my worst and that makes me stronger than you

    Alice, to random
    @Alice@beige.party avatar

    In junior high, I was cast as the understudy for the mayor in The Pied Piper.

    The day before the first performance, the mayor broke their leg (classic theater BS).

    Given that I didn’t bother to learn any lines because I was just the stupid understudy, I gave the best performance of my life when I convinced the mayor to PERFORM WITH A BROKEN LEG because F that, I wasn’t going to stand on that stage in front of all of those people, two working legs or not.

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    @LoganFive @ozofriendly @Alice That just means that you are a lucky son of a gun who gets to feel the rush of reading them for the first time!

    xinicit,
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    @ozofriendly @LoganFive @Alice I was just paraphrasing Spider Robinson lol

    xinicit, to random
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    There should be a service where regular dudes can sign up to receive compliments.

    xinicit, to random
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    What’s the point of breaking down if people are still gonna want shit when you feel better?

    Stoned_Deva_, to random
    @Stoned_Deva_@mas.to avatar

    Many of you hate Crocs and will die on that hill. I'm just sorry to see you walk away, especially in such uncomfy shoes.

    xinicit,
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    @Stoned_Deva_ Crocs are an affront to good taste and are only worn by people who have given up. I own three pairs.

    xinicit, to random
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    Congratulations on living past 30! Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to discover new music that sounds like old music and doesn’t remind you of your unresolved trauma and shame!

    xinicit,
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    @accretionist The feels! They burn!

    xinicit,
    @xinicit@floe.earth avatar

    @accretionist 😂😂😂

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