Azal

@Azal@pawb.social

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Azal,

There was a lot of build up before, depression got bad. Honestly can’t go through absolutely everything that was going on. The final straw was locking myself out of my house and car in a town where everyone I knew was about 100 miles away, and I had a box cutter on me. I had the medical knowledge of how to cut to make sure it’d work. However I knew my dad, a paramedic who would walk away from horrible fatalities without a reaction was deeply bothered when a kid committed suicide, and I am an only child. Called the police on myself, took me to the hospital where the stress literally made it where any light whatsoever was a painful headache. Still comes back on high stress times.

Dad made me promise I wouldn’t take my life. The depression hasn’t left, it’s not as desperately bad as it was then but it’s still there. But been alive for about 15 years since.

Azal,

Green River… unless it’s the Sprecher Red Apple but that’s seasonal which makes me angry lol

Azal,

US here… it has less to do with the 1% being fucking morons and more to do with the only infrastructure we actually pay any attention to is cars. Sure we’re having a bit of a bicycle revolution but at least in my area the bikes aren’t being used for transport but for fun, but then that’s with a metro that’s sprawling with a city that’s only 100 sq miles smaller than NYC, with 8,000,000 less people in it. Add that the auto companies were allowed to buy out things like the streetcar that was local and able to tear up the tracks to get rid of competition, it really isn’t a shocker.

But we’re now stuck in a cyclical spiral, of no investment for things like this are happening because it’s not seen as profitable enough. Which means a constant problem of using something like a bike for commuting is “But then I have nowhere I can put my bike where it won’t get fucked with.” so people don’t commute with it, which leads to no investment to the infrastructure.

Dunno how to fix it. It just sucks.

Azal,

Kansas city… what I’d kill for a fast track to Chicago, St Louis, Denver and the like…

I mean fuck, at least we have Amtrak to Chicago and one to St Louis… however only runs once a day, takes as long as driving as long as the priority that goes to freight trains doesn’t delay too much.

Azal,

Here’s something tangentially related that makes it difficult to find older options, the support. In the US a piece of medical device has to be supported for 7 years. My hospital has these bladder scanners that are in quite a few departments, regular fixture in hospitals (ultrasounds). Jan 1 2024 was when our came up on the 7 year mark. To do preventative maintenance calibration required logging on their server, guess what’s no longer accessible? So to stay in compliance all of us in the biomed department has to figure out how to get new ones to replace the 10 $11k each paperweights we have now.

Azal,

Kidney stones, gallstones, whatever the fuck the body does of “Lets build a rock inside the body that can fuck us up” needs to stop.

Azal,

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa…

Azal,

Former Christian here… I’ll give the religion credit it allows for a lot of openness and exactly what the pope is talking about. The main icon of Christianity was all about accepting people, legit the time where Jesus got angry with whips and table flipping was because money changers and vendors were cheating the poor (long story: You had pilgrims that would come bringing currency that would not be accepted by the temple so the money changers would do exactly what was on the tin… for a fee, and then the temple was selling animals to be sacrificed, the doves being brought up specifically because they were sold to the poorest that couldn’t afford the bigger sacrifices.) This is the idealogical head of the religion who is said to have sat and dined with those considered sinners while shunning the so called “faithful”

Honestly even as parable the stories in the bible are perfect reflections of the way most Christians would react. It’s said regularly that the Christians would kill Jesus as a heretic if he came back… ignoring the fact that it was those that had power within the church that crucified Jesus in the Bible.

I got lucky in being raised to go to a church with a preacher that was big on critical thinking. Another fitting example of Christianity ignoring its own teachings, post 9/11 said preacher gave a sermon talking about a religious extremist with a middle eastern background that spoke out against the prevailing government at the time, explaining that was exactly who Jesus was, the sermon on not hating from statements just made by assumptions, had the magazine that on the cover that had the ‘real face of Jesus’ to show not your white long haired man but the middle eastern face as a part of the sermon… naturally said preacher was politely “let go” from the church.

Azal,

and because it keeps bugs and birds from hitting the aforementioned rugged bearded handsomeness at high speeds

I wear a full face helmet because holy shit I know one saved my face. But even if the helmet wasn’t a separator from potential meat crayon situation, I’d still wear it for this reason right here. Seriously, I’ve had some beetles hit my helmet so hard it made me recoil, I can’t imagine taking one straight to face like that.

Azal,

Holy shit yes, this whole thing right here.

The trade fields are absolutely insanely full of men telling each other how manly they are and how not gay they are with the “notice me” mode that it’s kinda ‘dude… if you want guys to hit on you… you’re going about it all wrong.’

Azal,

I watched an extremely drunk dude kick his own ass at the nightclub

Greatest thing I’ve read all night.

deleted_by_moderator

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  • Azal,

    When Hamas attacked I commented Israel would lash out with it’s usual fervor, making sure that any Palestinians that didn’t support Hamas wouldn’t have a choice. And that the US world would back Israel, providing more ammunition to the Muslim extremists in the middle east to want to continue to fight the US. And Israel working at that time to a potential deal actually worked out with Saudi Arabia would get smashed. Hamas played the world like a fucking fiddle and literally everyone danced along with the tune.

    Azal,

    A’ight, you’re gonna have to actually give the details on how this is done if this is your “Too lazy to cook” recipe

    Azal,

    Please drink verification can to continue

    Azal,

    Friend of mine just had to shell out $3000 for prescription drugs just for survival. Yes he’s on insurance.

    what is a skill you wish you had, and why?

    Ok, I might as well go first: I wish I could draw. Not at the level where I could make photorealistic portraits, but I’ve always been envious of those who are able to scetch something together in a few minutes that perfectly captures what they want to convey. Sometimes words aren’t enough to express what I want to say, and...

    Azal,

    Motivate myself.

    It’s weird. I go to work, I’ll get the job done. Something comes in my inbox that shit is covered.

    I’ve been home for 3 hours now, and this is the most I’ve done tonight since I got home. Not even video games. Fuck haven’t gotten chores done. What the hell is that skill that I have at work that I don’t have at home?

    Azal,

    Honestly Tesla culture reminds me of any brand of car fanboyism. The ones I got most familiar with was the supposed “hot rodders” that viewed a junked out piece of rust that’s sat in a field 20 years worth thousands of dollars to spend thousands of dollars to not drive it. Got sick of it as someone who’s first car was a 70s one and attempting to find parts and pieces was people telling a high schooler to just take it to a shop and spend more than I’ve spent on my current modern car+motorcycle because none of them actually bothered working on their shit before.

    Now I said that, there’s also the motorcycle culture, and we’re weird as fuck.

    Azal,

    I miss seeing large amounts of fireflies.

    Azal,

    Where are you migrating to?

    Azal,

    Been noticing it at least for the past couple years.

    Azal,

    For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into the apostles of Christ. And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also be transformed as the ministers of righteousness; whose end shall be according to their works. 2 Corinthians 11:13-15

    Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them. Matthew 7:15-20

    If any man teach otherwise, and consent not to wholesome words, even the words of our Lord Jesus Christ, and to the doctrine which is according to godliness; He is proud, knowing nothing, but doting about questions and strifes of words, whereof cometh envy, strife, railings, evil surmisings, Perverse disputings of men of corrupt minds, and destitute of the truth, supposing that gain is godliness: from such withdraw thyself. But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and raiment let us be therewith content. But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. Timothy 6:3-10

    It’s funny. The Bible has a few things to say about these people. Shockingly not some of those things often taught, along with this gem.

    Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly. And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly. But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him. Mathew 6:1-8

    Ironically followed by the Lords Prayer, the most repeated part of scripture THEN FOLLOWING

    For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Matthew 6:14-15

    As a former Christian gone Agnostic… I can’t help but to think that if the Bible is true, there’s gonna be an awful lot of shocked “Christians”

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