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davep, to random

Just fixed the horn on the scouts' minibus.

Beep repaired.

anthropy,
@anthropy@mastodon.derg.nz avatar

@davep it took me a second to get the pun, I guess I hadn't beenp repaired :blobcatgooglyfingerguns:

davep, to random

I've lost 3 stone (42lb/18kg) in 10 months using my revolutionary new diet of not necking prodigious quantities of alcohol.

My metabolic age is the same as it was three years ago

davep,

@simonzerafa I'm also doing a slightly lax version of the 16/8 diet, allowing a certain amount of daily ketosis due to depleting glycogen levels. Avoiding high gycaemic index foods helps too.

simonzerafa,

@davep

So 16 Kgs of Coffee and 8 Kgs of chocolate per day? 😯

Seems a bit harsh but I guess I could give it a go ...

davep, to random

I got fired from my last job for asking my customers if they would prefer "smoking" or "non smoking".

Apparently the wokerati are insisting on "Cremation" or " Burial".

MishaVanMollusq,
@MishaVanMollusq@sfba.social avatar

@davep that just made me crack my first smile almost laugh of the day .
Thank you!

davep, to random

Before it was carved, Mount Rushmore’s beauty was totally unpresidented.

rudy,
@rudy@mstdn.ca avatar

@davep this would be funny if it wasn't so sad

stevewfolds,
@stevewfolds@mastodon.world avatar

@davep iirc Mount Rushmore was sacred before it was carved.

davep, to random

"In early research, Rockström and his colleagues found food was the largest sector of the economy breaching planetary boundaries. As well at the climate impact, it is a major driver of land-use change and biodiversity decline, and is responsible for 70% of freshwater drawdown."

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2024/jan/29/sustainable-food-production-economic-benefits-study

davep, to random

A few photos in Lerici near La Spezia. I took the wannabe arty ones of the fort and the sunset but my daughter took the splendid one of the two little girls and their friend.

davep, to random

Was setting up a new virtual host in Apache on my RPi, which has involved much gnashing of teeth and questioning of life choices.

Went down a rabbit hole of HSTS preloading of my principal host causing the other to flip to it along with many other increasingly improbable things.

It was obviously DNS. My PC and phone (and router) were storing old values. Restarted my phone, connected to a different network and it was fine to install the Let's Encrypt certificate.

I bloody hate computers.

graphite,

@davep s/computers/dns/

it's always DNS

davep,

Ok, there were other issues along the way, but the DNS one was the final straw.

davep, to random

Just had some organic wheat, barley, rye and oats as a cereal and I'm feeling simultaneously righteous and deeply unsatisfied.

simonzerafa,

@davep

A huge bar of chocolate will fix that issue 😁

davep, to random

A chap decided to paper his bedroom and as he knew that his neighbour‘s bedroom was the same size he asked how many rolls of paper he bought.

"Six", the neighbour replied. But when the chap finished papering his room he had two rolls left over. When he told his neighbour he said “So did I“.

davep, to random

My local golf shop is selling off some stock real cheap in an effort to hopefully stay in business.

The putters, drivers and irons are all gone, but they’re not out of the woods yet.

davep, to random

I’ve just injected steroids into my arms

Anabolic?

No, just my arms

davep, to random

Remains to be seen if glass coffins ever become popular.

qurlyjoe,
@qurlyjoe@mstdn.social avatar

@davep
Ba-dum-tish.

@amiserabilist

davep, to random

A man had a bad cut on his leg but wouldn't let the doctor give him stitches.

The doctor said "suture self"

davep, to random

A, E, I , O and U are really cranky today. They may have irritable vowel syndrome.

anthropy,
@anthropy@mastodon.derg.nz avatar

@davep on a scale from jester to dad, how punny are you feeling today

simonzerafa,

@davep

Y? 🫤🤷‍♂️

davep, to random

Electricity was down for 26 hours locally. I'd gone full-on loco caveman by the end.

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