@jessica@cutie.city
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

jessica

@jessica@cutie.city

Hello! I'm Jessica, an autistic Brit in their thirties who uses she/her pronouns. I have two pinned introduction toots if you want to know more about me.

Alt text of my profile picture: a cartoon image, from the shoulders up, of a curly brown haired white woman wearing glasses, a purple top, and gray dungarees. Behind are large stripes in black, gray, white and purple, with faint stars.

Alt text of my banner image: a zoomed in photograph of huge green leaves, similar to monstera deliciosa, on a black background.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

AutisticDoctorStruggles, to random
@AutisticDoctorStruggles@mas.to avatar

Feeling stressed and dysregulated today.
In part because some analysis is not as conclusive as I hoped for, in part due to other people being inconsistent af, in part due to big big meeting coming up tomorrow where I will put forward some asks for Neurodiversity support to our senior leadership at my work and is so important to me... And a few other small unplanned, uncertain things sprinkled about. Aaaaaahhhh!

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@AutisticDoctorStruggles :frog_hug:

RolloTreadway, to random
@RolloTreadway@beige.party avatar

Morning everyone. Last night was bad, this morning is very bad. There are things upsetting me that I really want to talk about but I can't right now because it'll take up all my energy and I need that energy for all the work that keeps piling up and for which I am not remotely adequate paid.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@RolloTreadway 💜💜

alicemcalicepants, to random
@alicemcalicepants@ohai.social avatar

Previous boost: one of the reasons I never learned to drive is that I don't trust myself to interpret other drivers' intentions correctly. I have enough trouble walking and ending up in the sorry-no-you-go-first dance.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@alicemcalicepants Same, I just don't think I have the mentality for quick and correct decision making.

ashleyspencer, to random
@ashleyspencer@autistics.life avatar

My health insurance keeps denying my mental healthcare stuff. They won’t cover the dietician, decided my therapist isn’t in network, won’t cover my psychiatrist. All they will pay for is an incompetent nurse practitioner in a bad neighborhood who joked about changing all of my meds on the first visit. I’m paying $437 a month for it with no subsidies and still getting denied. My therapist is $141 a session, dietician is $156, psychiatrist is $380. sigh Will have to stop the dietician.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@ashleyspencer

Ugh, I'm so sorry, it sounds like nonsense to pay the insurance company so much and get so little in return.

Private healthcare in the UK is like half that cost and would cover all that.

It really sucks :neofox_hug_cat:

jessica, to Taskmaster
@jessica@cutie.city avatar
  1. Watched 📺
  2. Cuddled cat 🐈
  3. Listened to music 🎶

jessica, to random
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

3/5

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
🟩⭐🟩⬜🟩
🟩🟩⭐🟩🟩
🟩⬜🟩⭐🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

gnitro, to vinyl
@gnitro@urusai.social avatar

: Miki Matsubara – Cupid

https://songwhip.com/miki-matsubara/cupid2009

@vinylrecords @jpop

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@gnitro 😍

ContraindiKate, to novid
@ContraindiKate@disabled.social avatar

Any recommendations from @novid homebound people re: best platform/procedure for me to watch movies/tv online with friends online? So far we've just been getting on a video call on one device and then hitting 'play' together on another. It's never really in sync....

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@ContraindiKate If one of you has a Plex server, you can stream and watch together: https://support.plex.tv/articles/watch-together/

gnitro, to vinyl
@gnitro@urusai.social avatar

: Neon Vectors, マクロスMACROSS 82-99 – Club 84

https://songwhip.com/neonvectors/club-84

@vinylrecords

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@gnitro :rainbow_dance:

SGV_UK, to random

I've been on the housing register since I was discharged from hospital homeless in July last year. I bid on properties when available each week. I'm far back in the queue. I hope they don't take me off the register. I would love the security of a council home tenancy one day.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@SGV_UK 🤞

alicemcalicepants, to random
@alicemcalicepants@ohai.social avatar

Not pushing myself to be productive today because ugggggh. Headache + still a bit mad at myself + THIS FUCKING GOVERNMENT.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@alicemcalicepants

🖕The Tories 🖕

RolloTreadway, to random
@RolloTreadway@beige.party avatar

I was supposed to go do woodland volunteering this morning. I'd said I was going to go. I should go. It is unequivocally A Good Thing. I love the woods and I should want to help. I am clearly not a good person if I choose not to help the woods when I'm capable of doing so.

But I woke up about 4am in a panic, absolutely terrified of having to go and do the volunteering. Panicking about having to mask and Be A Normal Human around other volunteers. Panicking about all the mud (I am a very clumsy and ill-coordinated person and I find the effort to keep myself steady on uneven ground can get overwhelming). Panicking about having to saw through things which I'm so bad at because I'm clumsy and ill-coordinated and can't cut in a straight line. Panicking about having to work with other people whilst I try to saw. Panicking about other people trying to help whilst I take forever trying to cut something properly.

So I cried off. And I don't know if I can ever go again because these problems aren't going to go away. And if I was a good person then right now I'd be getting my stuff together, getting ready to leave and to help the woods that I love.

But I'm an absolute failure who can't even do a simple thing like cutting back plants before the spring, when it needs doing for the benefit of the community's woods. I hate myself. I don't want to be this person at all.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@RolloTreadway :hugs:

jessica, to random
@jessica@cutie.city avatar
  1. Ate a doughnut 🍩
  2. Spent time on 🖥️
  3. Watched 🧛‍♀️

jessica, to random
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

4/5

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
🟩⭐🟩⭐🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
🟩⭐🟩⭐🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

jessica, to Jpop
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

Time for by @Kitty, with the theme for this being by @AqiDrago!

Got to go with the 10:31 bilingual Japanese-English Halloween epic "Lollipop Candy♥BAD♥girl" where the alter-egos of Tomoko Kawase / 川瀬 智子 duet in 's Tommy February6 and 's Tommy Heavenly6:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSzA0wXj79c

It's completely ridiculous, and yet is a Halloween staple for me to listen to every year 😅

mitch, to random
@mitch@posts.dumb.stuff.donaberger.xyz avatar

so we're all just gonna ignore that jack dorsey owns bsky, huh

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@mitch

Yeah, but, he's a good billionaire!

...

:blob_roll_eyes:

jessica, (edited ) to random
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

When was the last time you went on holiday/vacation?

ShinyAmygdala, to random

So now we are at the point of rationing oatmeal.

I'm here laying in bed, trying to wind down and get my pain back down so I can fall asleep at a good hour, and I hear conflict coming from the kitchen because a teen got "too much" oatmeal from the fridge.

We have to ration all the food so everyone gets enough.

My partner has been prevented from working as much as we need them too because of harrassment from the landlord, the neonazis upstairs from us, and the fact that we kept getting sick from when the kids were in public school (we had to pull the kids out and go back to homeschooling, again).

Our SNAP been cut again due to Social Security raising our benefits.

The food bank doesn't carry the food we need because we have lots of food allergies and dietary needs, and all the food banks have are wheat, sugar, peanut butter and dairy. 3 of us have wheat allergies and Celiacs, and 2 of us have a dairy allergy, 2 of us a peanut allergy. 2 of us can eat eggs, but the banks by us don't ever have eggs. The food banks don't even have canned veggies. The last food bank we went to had loaves of stale wheat bread, bitter half rotted squash, 2 yrs past expiry date cans of pumpkin, boxes of stove top stuffing, Capri Sun packets, potato chips, mac and cheese boxes, jug of milk, packs of craft cheese, peanut butter crackers-- that kind of stuff.

We are in a rural area and it's a food desert. The stores in town are the yuppy food stores and expensive.

I already don't eat as much as I need to because I save it all for the kids. They are going through growth spurts and need to constantly eat. I wish we had enough

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@ShinyAmygdala I'm so sorry, it hurts that this is happening in one of the world's wealthiest countries. I don't understand how society has just accepted that situations like yours is fine.

Sending hugs, love, and strength.

RolloTreadway, to sandwiches
@RolloTreadway@beige.party avatar

You know those cheap barely-flavoured tortilla chips in the supermarket? Put them in any hot sandwich. Crunch makes every sandwich better. Trust me on this.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@RolloTreadway 100% agree

samantha, to random
@samantha@autistics.life avatar

It's hard for me to overstate how happy I am I found all you wonderful people around here 💜.

Having people to share small and big life events with, and getting to know people hearing about their lives, good and bad days makes a difference.

Especially the support from y'all after I came out really made a huge positive difference. You have helped me figure out more who I am, and you made the process so far, a lot less scary than I feared it would be. [1/2]

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@samantha :frog_hug:

RolloTreadway, to random

Are we (the instance) off again, or is it just me?

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@RolloTreadway I can see you and this post, if that helps at all.

jessica, to random
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

2/5

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
🟩⭐🟩⬜🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
🟩⬜🟩⭐🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

jessica, to random
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

Question: for those who sit up in bed a lot, how good/useful/comfortable are those V shaped pillows?

Currently in a phase where sitting at the computer becomes quickly tiring, and I don't have a sofa or armchair in my room, so I've been in bed on the laptop, and wondering if that V pillow I've seen on sale at the supermarket is worth it.

Thanks!

jessica, to random
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

Okay, so looks like Kane is off?

If so, my draft currently looks like this:

Johnston - Turner

Stones - Gabriel - Estupinan - Chilwell - ?

Mbeumo - Saka - Mitoma - Maddison - Diaby

Joao Pedro - Haaland - Watkins

Problem is that ? in defence. I have 7.5 to spend:

Do I get a 4.5 and sit with lots of money in the bank?
Do I get Trippier now and he sits on my bench for a few weeks?
Do I get TAA and move Maddison down to Eze?
Do I get TAA and switch Chilwell to Saliba?

I don't use Man United players, so Shaw is not an option (also why I don't have Rashford or Bruno).

So many options! 🤯

magicalgrrrl, to random

Super 8 in St Cloud booked for tomorrow night until Tuesday morning for now. Very ready to get the fuck out of South Dakota already. Leaving in morning.

Monday afternoon Luke and I have a virtual intake interview with the organization Transitional Justice (https://transjustice.io/)
We got lucky and a TikTok we made asking for help the other day went viral and somebody connected with the organization ended up reaching out to us. They might be able to help us with getting more permanent housing in MN.

jessica,
@jessica@cutie.city avatar

@magicalgrrrl 🤞

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