pa

sebwhatever, 8 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic tell me you are #actuallyautistic without telling me you are autistic. #askingautistics

dave, 15 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic Saw this at the pharmacy and picked it up... curious to see what it says.

#ActuallyAutistic

dgar, 15 days ago to random

What do you call a man with a piece of wood on his head?

Edward.

What do you call a man with three pieces of wood on his head?

Edward Woodward.

What do you call a man with four pieces of wood on his head?

I don’t know either, but Edward Woodward would.

Claydisarray, 15 days ago to actuallyautistic

Echolalia.

So THAT'S why I've had a refrain from Glenn Miller's Pennsylvania 6-5000 stuck in my brain for the last 40-odd years. :blob_laughing:

@actuallyautistic

ashleyspencer, 16 days ago to actuallyautistic

I googled “autism and traumatic brain injury” hoping to find something about living with both at the same time.

ALL the results were studies done to see if TBIs cause autism. 😒

Not one article, reddit post, quora post, was about living with both. Ugh.

@actuallyautistic

Dr_Obvious, 16 days ago to actuallyautistic German

@actuallyautistic
I had my appointment for ADHD treatment today. With regards to ADHD that went quite fine. Some check ups need to be done, but there is no questioning on that.

Sadly he thought it would be calming information for me that I don't appear autistic to him...

I told him that I really don't appreciate that comment and that there are aspects about my personality and history that can best be explained by autism and that he can't see anything from that in our half hour talk.

ideogram, 17 days ago to Autism

Do allistic people really need constant interaction with others? In person? It sounds horrific. I lived with other people for years. Often they want interaction. That's just brutal for the autistic mind isn't it?
#Autism #autistic #neurodiverse #lgbtqi #ActuallyAutistic

ScottSoCal, 18 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic

A couple of weeks ago, in another place where I generally feel safe, someone made a scathing comment - not to me, or even about me - about "self-diagnosed autistics". Without a signed certificate, apparently we aren't worthy of the label.
I've been stewing about it ever since, and sometimes doubting myself. This morning I'm peeved. Who the hell is that person to make declarations about other people - including me?

twan, 18 days ago to actuallyautistic

One big advantage of being #actuallyautistic is, for me, that I'm so used to #crises in my life (heck, life is one big #crisis to me), when something happens that NT's perceive as a crisis, I usually don't blink an eye.

"Oh, but you stayed so calm and handled the situation!" – Nope, you're just used to see me on a daily basis in constant crisis mode.

@actuallyautistic

pathfinder, 28 days ago to Autism

@actuallyautistic

I once wrote about how it was not unrealistic, to think that there was no such thing as an un-traumatised autistic. About how so many of us have known bullying and persecution simply for being different. Not even always for what we may have said or done, but often for simply standing out; in all the ways that we didn't even know we were. How just simply being, was so often an excuse to be attacked or punished. That our very existence, even as hard as we tried to mask, whether we knew that was what we were doing or not, was the cause of so much pain.

All the scars we carry from misreading situations. Or from believing in something, or someone, and being burnt as a consequence. All the times we've tried to stand up for ourselves, or as often as not for others, and been dismissed and ridiculed. All the misjudgements and disbelieve and times when our intent and purpose have been seen in the ways that were never, ever, meant. The sheer inability for others to see us as we are, or to judge us accordingly. But, always to seem to want to see the worst and to base everything else on that.

But the more I learn and understand about being autistic. The more I realise that so much of my trauma and the scars that were left, came not just from this overt pain, but from the covert well-meaning of others as well. From my parents and relatives, from friends and teachers. From all the advice and instruction I have received over the years that was meant to shape me in the right way. As a child, to teach me how to grow up, how to behave and act. What was expected and what wasn't. And then, as an adult, how I was supposed to be and how a successful life, with me in it, was supposed to look. All the rules I was supposed to learn, all the codes I was supposed to follow. How to act, how to speak, what to feel, when to feel it. What I was supposed to do and how I was supposed to be.

Not in any unusual way. Not in any way that you weren't supposed to raise a child, well a normal child anyway. That's what makes this so covert. If you were trying to do this to a child knowing that they were autistic, then it's overt abuse. It is ABA, it is infantilising and punishing a child for always failing to become something, that they had no more chance of becoming than a cat has of becoming a dog. But for those of us who didn't know we were autistic. It was simply the constant hammering of the world trying, without even realising it, to fit a round peg into a square hole and all the pain and disappointment that came from their failure to come even close.

For me, what made this worse, was that it wasn't as if I didn't know that I was different, not in my heart, but that I thought that I shouldn't be. That I should be able to learn what I was being taught, that I should be able to follow the guidance. That I wasn't any different really from anyone else and so if I failed to act in the right way, or react the way I should, for that matter, then it was my fault. All the patient sighs and familiar looks, simply became just another reinforcement of my failure. Even being told off for the simplest things, became a reminder that something that I should have been able to do, was beyond me and always for the only reason that ever made any sense; that I was broken, that it was my fault somehow.

Is it any wonder that so much of my life has been about trying to justify myself in the light of this, of trying to become that "good dog". Of judging myself against an impossible standard. A constant lurching from one bad to choice to another, and always because I thought they were the right ones. And for each new failure and inability to even come close, another scar, another reminder of what I wasn't. Further proof that my self-esteem was right to be so low. Of how I was such a failure and a bad person. That I was never going to be a proper son or brother or friend. Because I couldn't even be what I was supposed to be, let alone what I should become.

Looking back, I can't help thinking about how much of my life I spent living this way; of trying not to repeat the sins of my past. Of not repeating the actions or behaviour that led to those past failures and trauma. Of, in fact, all the effort I put in to not being myself. Because that, I realise now, was what I was trying to do. I was that round peg and trying to hammer myself into the square hole. Because everything I had learnt had taught me to think that this was how I had to be. That this was how you grew. And in so many ways, I can't help feeling angry about this. About the wasted years, about the scars I carry that were never my fault. About the way I was brought up, even though none of it was ever meant, but only ever well-meant.

#Autism
#Actuallyautistic

adelinej, 29 days ago to actuallyautistic

I have a question for AUTISTIC parents homeschooling their children.

Do you have any neurodivergent affirming ressources about PDA and homeschooling of teenagers?

It's for an autistic friend, she lives in France (I'm in Canada), she's homeschooling her 3 children for years now and she's struggling a with her 12 years old boy. Thank you.

#AskingAutistics @actuallyautistic

pa, 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

Miffed for no reason: this morning my Starbucks barista can't even spell my fake name right. 🫠
#actuallyautistic @actuallyautistic

ottaross, 1 month ago (edited 1 month ago) to Montreal

There's a bit of Montreal just east of Atwater near Ste Catherine/Maisonneuve with lots of dumpling/soup-dumpling shops.

Would be a great area to do a dumpling crawl, which we'll try someday when we're not already full of snacks.

Need to choose today between Qing Hua, Petit Poisson, Sammi, and Fu Chun. They're all close together and I don't know which one is best, but we'll probably pick something among those once we're hungry again.

Any recommendations #Montreal?

#dumplings #soupDumplings

niconiconi, 1 month ago to random

geohot implies the existence of heliocold

pa, 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic Tonight is an international Gala for Diversity and Inclusion. As the cis-white-abled-neurotypical executives and diplomats arrived for pictures in an atmosphere of prom night, looking down on me leaving after work, I wondered who was there from under-represented groups. At least they had cookies from an LGBT bakery, only for attendees.

nddev, 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

An explanation for your friends and loved ones of why #ActuallyAutistic people can't find things and what they can do to help us:

https://www.thearticulateautistic.com/why-your-autistic-loved-one-cant-find-objects-right-in-front-of-them/

@actuallyautistic

ottaross, 1 month ago (edited 1 month ago) to random

It's that day (in North America anyway) where you wake up in the winter and go to bed in #spring.

I'm still in bed, but will shortly throw aside my heavy blanket of furs and stamp out the large bonfire at the foot of my bed.

Tonight, after the #equinox, I'll crawl onto my flower-petals-covered straw mattress, and just pull up a light, whispy, gauze-like blanket.

autism101, 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

Have you ever been told you are too quiet and you should talk more?

#AskingAutistics #ActuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic

image: unknown

pinkpenguin, 1 month ago to random

i

i think i might have just gotten mansplained microwaves????

...

i need to lie down

dgar, 2 months ago to random

Me: This butter tastes great.

Them: Actually, it’s ghee.

Me: Ah, thanks for clarifying.