programmerhumor

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fuckbutton, in So true

Wow what a giant cunt you are

over_clox, in So true

Jebus does not approve this post.

db2, in So true

Go back to wherever you came from. Your stupidity isn’t wanted or welcome.

Troooonsbtfo,

You will never be a woman

PP_BOY_, in So true
@PP_BOY_@lemmy.world avatar

This is neither related to programming nor humorous

Troooonsbtfo,

And you will never be a woman

PP_BOY_,
@PP_BOY_@lemmy.world avatar

That’s reassuring for me, a straight cis male who is comfortable in my AGAB, to hear

Harpsist, in This is why I left the IT dept

Back in my day. Printers printed in dots. And that’s the way we liked it.

Put cabled in. And it worked.

And it was so satisfying ripping the side holes off.

cupcakezealot,
@cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Ripping the side holes off and putting them into a box so you have an entire box full of shredded paper sides

datendefekt,
@datendefekt@lemmy.ml avatar

Also satisfying: folding two strips like this:

https://lemmy.ml/pictrs/image/362ef6f1-00e3-4099-93c4-8e3fbde36642.jpeg

drolex, in C++ Meme

I’m not even there yet, I’m just trying to resolve my IDE configuration issues

agent_flounder,
@agent_flounder@lemmy.one avatar

Me irl spending an hour trying to figure out why vscode reformats pasted code by 2 spaces when I’ve set 4 spaces for indent as the default… so I could write ten lines of code (as a hobbyist)…

drolex,

SPACES FOR INDENTS???!? 😤

You’re one of these pre-incrementers? smh

aracebo,

My manager was helping me debug someone else’s embedded firmware and the first thing he did was change the Keil preferences from tabs to spaces :/

AlexDawn,

I’m not even even there yet, I am still installing my 37th loading bar plugin

JATtho,

Me:

  • Need to debug a program
  • Debugger doesn’t work
  • Need to debug the debugger
  • Look at a hardware bug in the CPU that breaks ptrace syscall /s
  • Go find a bucket of sand.
normanwall, in This is why I left the IT dept

deleted_by_author

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  • DLSchichtl,

    Welcome to the world of business printing done right. A rare sight these days.

    lud,

    Software like papercut is the best.

    vicfic,
    @vicfic@iusearchlinux.fyi avatar

    imho, the new printers are pretty good. Like ever since the companies stopped the inkjet fiasco and switched over to the inktank thing, its been really smooth.

    My experience with the Epson ecotank is pretty good.

    BaldProphet,
    BaldProphet avatar

    HP is still the worst, though.

    dditty,

    The only difference between HP and a 1930’s Italian mob protection racket is they don’t break your kneecaps yet

    vicfic,
    @vicfic@iusearchlinux.fyi avatar

    Yeah, even their inktanks are unusable.

    misterundercoat,

    That guy is too smart, he’d better he careful. He’ll be found dead at his desk after mysteriously choking on an HP cyan cartridge.

    Honytawk,

    They wouldn’t be so obvious.

    They would just slowly replace all his blood with HP 952XL Magenta

    rmuk,

    That’s an expensive way to kill someone. It’d probably be cheaper to pay for a hitman at the point.

    InvertedParallax,

    It’s not about the money, it’s about sending a message.

    ikidd,
    @ikidd@lemmy.world avatar

    I did something similiar, I named all the printers with an esoteric naming scheme based on the OU and location, but completely indecipherable, and GPO reset the default printer every morning. That way the print was always released to a random printer that the user chose in utter bewilderment and confusion, so there was no chance any particular printer would see enough use that I’d have to change the toner in this decade.

    Worked great.

    FedFer,

    Lawful good solution and chaotic good solution

    Dirk, in This is why I left the IT dept
    @Dirk@lemmy.ml avatar
    vicfic,
    @vicfic@iusearchlinux.fyi avatar

    HP is the worst.

    lord_ryvan,

    Why is “jup” in German/Dutch/Swedish/Danish spelling?

    Are you an undercover German?

    Dirk,
    @Dirk@lemmy.ml avatar

    Jup.

    lord_ryvan,

    OH SHIT GET 'T LUCHTALARM /j

    Dirk,
    @Dirk@lemmy.ml avatar

    Guten Tag!

    DarkenLM, in In case you forgot.

    Say what you want about it, but it will not go down without using everything in the vicinity as a weapon if ammo runs out. While others go down, they will be kamikazeing themselves to get the job done.

    MrPoopyButthole,
    @MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.world avatar

    .catch(error) { }

    Ddhuud,

    .catch( error => { } )

    ??

    SpaceNoodle,

    You try to reload your gun, but it ends up just sticking bullets on the end.

    roembol, in Made a little iOS Shortcut to give me a TL;DR for articles with ChatGPT

    …this is programmer humor

    fer0n, (edited )

    Honest question: what are you getting at?

    Edit: for anyone upvoting this because they think it’s about sharing a shortcut, look again.

    cypherpunks,
    @cypherpunks@lemmy.ml avatar

    Edit: for anyone upvoting this because they think it’s about sharing a shortcut, look again.

    also for everyone reporting this as “offtopic” 😄

    librecat,
    @librecat@lemmy.basedcount.com avatar

    it’s a cool thing you’ve made, but where’s the joke?

    PotatoKat,

    Using ChatGPT if I had to guess

    fer0n,

    Not sure if that’s sarcasm, but yes ChatGPT. It’s also in the title.

    GarrettBird,

    Perhaps the AI is reading the cookie banner that appears on nearly every page, and then reading the article?

    cypherpunks,
    @cypherpunks@lemmy.ml avatar
    fer0n, (edited )

    ChatGPT is getting the entire website and is supposed to summarize the article on it. The article has nothing to do with cookies or privacy settings.

    This post isn’t about the shortcut, it‘s just linked for reference. If you take a look at what the shortcut produced it’s not exactly an endorsement.

    SARGEx117,

    People are seeing the name and everything else they’ve read flies out the window.

    It gave me a chuckle!

    tetrahedron, in Voice comments

    I am deaf. i already struggle with keeping up with subtitles on tutorial videos of some obscure stuff that has little to no docs. Kindly return this idea to a void function instead and try not to catch the erroneous thread with these satanic proposals.

    mathemachristian, in Voice comments

    I already hate people who send voice messages in a world where dictation software exists. I hate whoever even thought of joking about this even more.

    maniel,
    @maniel@lemmy.ml avatar

    But dictation software would omit crucial parts like ummms, coughing etc

    LostXOR,

    "crucial parts"

    gravitas_deficiency,

    Dude you’re not thinking about it the right way. We can define a new multi byte character set to help define mood (both speaker and listener), intention, irony, sarcasm, sincerity, bodily functions, and so on. This is a solvable problem.

    maniel, (edited )
    @maniel@lemmy.ml avatar

    Yeah, you🚽 might💨 be💩 onto😌 something💦

    !Tried to emulate it as I wrote the above content while taking a dump!<

    lightsecond,

    You missed a /s marker

    gravitas_deficiency,

    I assumed it was obvious because honestly who would do that

    Tau,

    Some people hace difficulty picking on sarcasm, specially on the internet. That’s why you should use “/s” even if it may sound obvious to you

    gravitas_deficiency,

    Generally? Sure.

    But this is programmerhumor.

    lobut,

    I have literally given up friendships from people that wouldn’t stop sending me voice messages.

    I accept it from family, kids, the elderly and such. I just can’t believe people want me to turn off my music and slowly listen to your shitty voice when I can easily multitask.

    XTornado,

    At least most apps added playback speed selector.

    MotoAsh,

    I just never set up my voicemail. Then people who actually have a chance of successfully contacting me know not to even try the phone.

    muddi,

    Voice messages are good for those who speak a language which doesn’t get focused on by transcription services or are too old to read tiny text

    Kuori,
    @Kuori@hexbear.net avatar

    maybe this sucks of me but when people do this i just don’t bother listening. sorry you couldn’t be assed to send a fifteen second text, i def can’t be fucked to listen to a five minute ramble that’s mostly filler

    Olgratin_Magmatoe,

    The dictation software we have is pretty shitty though. It almost always needs proof-read, or re-dictated several times to get it right. At that point you may as well just send an audio clip.

    Until the day that dictation software gets it 100% correct, it’s not going to be worth my time.

    For now, the human on the other end will always have an easier time understand an audio clip than a machine, because human minds are more capable of using context and getting past regional accents.

    nosurprises,

    the human on the other end will always have an easier time understand never listen to an audio clip

    FTFY

    LillyPip, (edited )

    I’ll read comments, but I would never listen to voice comments. Literally never. I’d spend an hour googling for context and solutions before I’d listen to a voice message in the code pages.

    Voice is objectively the worst way to convey data via computer. It almost always wastes my time, is horrible to skim for relevant info, and for complex topics is an absolute nightmare.

    Text is so, so much more efficient. I can’t imagine why anyone would want this. If it’s ever implemented, please don’t make it obvious. Nobody should be encouraged to inflict this on coworkers or future devs.

    e: errant ’s’

    TheFriendlyDickhead,

    Most of the times I get a voice message it could be written in two sentences, but they still decide to make it a two minute voice message. Just a lot of useless stuff added for free

    programmer_belch,
    @programmer_belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

    I always try to think about what I’m writing before sending it, you can’t proofread an audio message

    Mouselemming,

    Sorry, hon. It’s hardwired into humans to add in code for “I am alive and not cackling mad or suicidal yet today” during “conversations.” It would probably be more effective at screening for bots than captcha, but not as good at training bots.

    Nahvi,

    The dictation software we have is pretty shitty though.

    As someone who used dictation software when said software needed to be trained first and also trained its users how to speak more clearly, it always amazes me when I hear people say things like this.

    The problem is human speech is lazy and inaccurate. Half of the time I have to listen to a voice clip there are two or three words in the clip that are barely intelligible. If I don’t catch it by the third pass I stop and just guess by context. It is the same thing the AWESOME dictation software we have today does, but saves me the time and effort and gives the sender a chance to fix their own mumbles.

    Of course, I’m one of those people whose voicemail message used to be, “Don’t leave me a message unless your call went straight to voicemail. I will see your missed call and call you back.”

    UniDestroyer, in Voice comments

    You are too dangerous to be kept alive.

    Narrrz, in Welp, guess I'm going to hell

    what on earth is that preview image?

    xusontha,

    whut

    That is NOT what it’s supposed to be, it seems to only be goofy on kbin.social, here’s what the preview looks like on lemmy: label

    Narrrz,

    oh yeah, the image works fine when I open it, but kbin gets wacky previews from some sites.

    xusontha,

    Yeah I’m looking at some of my posts across multiple Kbin instances and they look crazy haha

    ripcord,
    ripcord avatar

    Weirdly it looks fine to me on kbin social, but I don't get the joke :(

    xusontha,

    Looking at two different Kbin instances it looks like these two images:

    labellabel

    knexcar,

    Heaven says “your browser is not supported”? Funny because of the frustration of using non-Chromium browsers on certain websites.

    ripcord,
    ripcord avatar

    I've still not seen that message for a decade and I use Firefox 90+% of the time

    Jaysyn, in "First remove the closed source vendor lock in from your own codebase before checking for license issues in your neighbor's codebase" Engineerings 5:33
    Jaysyn avatar

    This meme is stupid. FOSS versions of all that crap also exist.

    bane_killgrind,

    Out of that list, I like MongoDB. I just did bits in SQL before I started using it for the little python tools I've made for stuff.

    Pencilnoob,

    Yeah but are you using it or are you using the closed source options?

    eclipse,

    Who cares? You act annoying just like Foss fan boys.

    257m,

    No, I have never used any of those closed source options. I wanted cloud services I have perfectly good esp32 lying around. And if I get worried about the vendor provided system libraries I can just buy a Raspberry Pi or something.

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