@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

andthisismrspeacock

@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to

Fortysomething cloud systems architect guy from New England. Gay. Anxiety. Jeeps. Fast cars. Former church organist. Hiking. Crumpet ambassador. Photography. Sailing. Crochet before it was trending. Licensed cinema projectionist. The uncle who lets you stay up late and eat junk food.

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Binder, to random
@Binder@petrous.vislae.town avatar

A peccadillo is substantially similar to an armadillo, differing by more closely resembling a penis than it does a forearm.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@kithrup @Binder This implies the existence of a nanodillo which I enjoy.

andthisismrspeacock, to random
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

You know, we often say that a cool thing about Masto is that it feels like the "old internet", where you make real connections with real people, and that's true!

Something we maybe don't talk about as much is that when you lose someone on here it's much more real for that reason.

If I lose 100 Instagram followers, IDGAF. If I lose one real person on here, I feel it.

the_etrain, to random
@the_etrain@beige.party avatar

Welcome to your 40s! If you sneeze in an awkward position, you may require a visit to the orthopedist.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@riversidebryan @the_etrain Dude I yawned while brushing my teeth and couldn't stand up straight for a week. And I do yoga! (Like, not well but I do try.)

emarktaylor, to Hockey
@emarktaylor@thecanadian.social avatar

๐Ÿ’ :NHL: :StanleyCup: @hnom @hockey :HNOM:

TOR 2-1 in OT

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@MagentaRocks @emarktaylor @hnom @hockey I mean we don't have anything particular against the NYR.

But I do get the "fuck Boston they've had enough success" kind of vibe.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@MagentaRocks @emarktaylor @hnom @hockey Ahhh, yeah, that... tracks.

Donny From Medford times a couple thousand does tend to show up at the Garden and [start fights | chant racist things | publicly urinate] and, yeah, we deserve to get judged for our inability to shun that shit.

andthisismrspeacock, to random
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

I see that Gay Twitter has finally discovered Girthmasterr, falling further and further behind the zeitgeist ๐Ÿ˜†

the_etrain, to random
@the_etrain@beige.party avatar

The masculine urge to walk around shirtless after chest day.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@the_etrain @CheapPontoon It was 55F here yesterday and there were shirtless guys on the sidewalk. Not that I'm complaining.

the_etrain, to random
@the_etrain@beige.party avatar

Can't. That's the day the teddy bears have their picnic.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@the_etrain
THE DOMESTIC PARTNER: (puzzled) Is there a reason you've been whistling "The Teddy Bears' Picnic" all morning?

andthisismrspeacock, to coffee
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

So I just walked down to the corner to get my morning beverage and I noticed there's a new coffee shop opening this weekend, and the thought of having a croissant and a real cappucino made by a new barista is really tempting, but that would mean I'd have to say goodbye to my current barista, by which I mean the Albanian lady at 7-11 who sells me my Monster Ultra and lottery tickets.

andthisismrspeacock, to Sleeping
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

Me: Can we please sleep?

My Brain: NO LOL INSOMNIA AGAIN

Me: What do you want? I took our #Anxiety meds. And I didn't feed you tea or Monster Ultra today.

My Brain: LIKE BEING AWAKE MOAR INTERNETS PLZ

Me: But we need to sleep. Tomorrow is Sunday, we can internets then. How about some ambient rain noises?

My Brain: NO I SAID INSOMNIA

Me: ...

Me: If I liked drinking alone you better believe I'd martini you into oblivion right now. ๐Ÿคฌ

#ConversationsWithMyBrain #Insomnia

Alice, (edited ) to random
@Alice@beige.party avatar

I would never do standup comedy for a lot of reasons, but one of the main reasons is because I've learned almost everything by reading and I have very bad intuitions about how words should be pronounced so I think it's best for everyone if I just keep typing in this box and everyone else can keep assuming I pronounce these words properly.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@Alice "Don't make fun of someone who uses a word correctly but pronounces it wrong: it means they learned it by reading." --is a good proverb I learned a long time ago, I forget where.

But also I was pretty embarrassed when my CA friend told me 'Mendocino' has a soft 'c', not a hard one... been saying that wrong for at least 20 years and nobody told me?! Not even the wine store guy???

andthisismrspeacock, to college
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

I firmly believe that living in a college town helps keep you feeling young.

I have the windows open tonight. It's the first pleasant weekend evening of the spring, and I hear groups of the kids laughing and talking, on their way to various house parties. It makes the years just kind of fall away, and that's a great feeling.

SmudgeTheInsultCat, to random
@SmudgeTheInsultCat@mas.to avatar

The humble home of pastor Kenneth Copeland, next to his private airport.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@SmudgeTheInsultCat Something something money changers something temple, idk I forget it must not have been important.

andthisismrspeacock, to random
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

I just realized that Holden Caulfield is autistic and that book finally makes sense to me now.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@Alice I know, right?! Did like, everyone else know this already?

the_etrain, to random
@the_etrain@beige.party avatar

Me: at the orgy You gonna eat that? I will if you're not gonna.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@the_etrain Bro, if I'm not gonna eat it, you should walk away while you still can.

Alice, (edited ) to random
@Alice@beige.party avatar

I seriously hate weddings.

I donโ€™t want to waste my day/night sitting through a boring ceremony and watching an attention-seeking bride prance around like a princess while Iโ€™m stuck at a table eating cold food and making smalltalk with a stranger about their boring job.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@stevegis_ssg @Alice IMO the only acceptable use of a registry is for pattern-oriented things like china and silver. As in, "if you choose to gift us a piece of china, we would like it to match our other china."

Since basically nobody uses real china or silver anymore, the gift registry can fuck off and die.

I had a friend recently send out a gift registry link because she was MOVING INTO A NEW APARTMENT.

Bitch, you make $300k a year I ain't buying your towels for you.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@stevegis_ssg @Alice The depraved capitalist perversion that has transformed the human joy of celebrating life's milestones into an opportunity for Retail Monetization and the death of etiquette that comes with that is something I could rant about for days.

I was a groomsman for a friend who told us that the required suits weren't rentable, we had to buy them for ~$600, but "that could count as our gift so we don't have to get them anything else."

Excuse the fuck me, cuntbag, don't have to?!

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@petes_bread_eqn_xls @stevegis_ssg @Alice I mean, I'm out here doing it, but getting a straight guy to 1. trust you and 2. admit he has feelings and 3. process from rejection and various other trauma into joyfulness, I mean, it's super fucking rewarding doing that but I AM ONE PERSON I CANNOT PROCESS ALL STRAIGHT GUYS.

Also the guy in question was just a straight-up selfish, egotistical, narcissistic cockknob so the above didn't apply.

Imagine Elon Musk in Mens Wearhouse from the dying mall.

andthisismrspeacock, to TikTok
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

"I need to get sheet 4-B, this is a whole other thing now." ๐Ÿ˜†โ˜ ๏ธ

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTLSfdJop/

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

ME: I am being SHADOWBANNED!

MY BRAIN: lol no u arnt its mastodon

ME: ...

MY BRAIN: just means nobody thot it was funny lol

ME: I still hate you.

andthisismrspeacock, to gay
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

Hey fam, if you didn't get your for some reason, you should do it now! It's easy and free and makes your forearm a little tingly for a while! If you aren't technically eligible just lie and say you're a slut!

https://abcnews.go.com/Health/mpox-rise-eligible-vaccine-booster/story?id=108665009

the_etrain, to random
@the_etrain@beige.party avatar

Jfc. The fighting over the television. I will buy my whole family those ridiculous VR goggles if they promise to STFU.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@the_etrain I had a Recreational Evening Encounter the other day with a young gentleman who despite living in a one-bedroom apartment (2nd floor with a pantry, off-street parking, and an outside deck for $925, I told him to lock that shit up for as long as possible but I digress) owns no less than FOUR televisions, so I'm sensing the youngs just expect to have their own screen in every room...

DemocracySpot, (edited ) to photography
@DemocracySpot@mstdn.social avatar

๐Ÿ“ท links to my images on the web. I welcome your comments and would love to see your pictures, too! โ€” Eddie


Three.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

@DemocracySpot That's just fanstastic!

andthisismrspeacock, to random
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

Professor Plum in the Billiard Room but just vibing.

andthisismrspeacock,
@andthisismrspeacock@mas.to avatar

Miss Scarlet in the study with the nipple clamps hooked up to a car battery.

It's not a murder mystery just a fun Friday night?

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