dgar

dgar, 1 year ago to random

Don’t be mad at lazy people.

They didn’t do anything.

khoji, 1 year ago to random

Emma has a pretty skirt
That’s split right up the sides
And everywhere that Emma went
The boys could see her thighs

Emma has another skirt
That’s split right up the front
She never wears that one

@dgar @davep

dgar, 1 year ago to random

Me: What’s 5Q plus 5Q?

Them: 10Q

Me: You’re welcome.

dgar, 1 year ago to random

#ThingsWeUsedToDoButDontDoNow
#HashtagGames

Rewinding tapes.

Extra points: Rewinding cassette tapes with a pencil.

dgar, 1 year ago to random

#ThingsWeUsedToDoButDontDoNow
#HashtagGames

Get up to change what’s on the TV.

dgar, 1 year ago to random

It's like OCD, except the letters are in alphabetical order.

Like they should be.

dgar, 1 year ago to random

The pond.

dgar, 1 year ago to random

By the handle.

dgar, 1 year ago to random

A Russian wife asks her husband "What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"

Her husband replied, "It's a proxy war between Russia and NATO."

"Oh, right. How's it going?"

"Well." he replied, "so far we've lost 200,000 soldiers, 4,000 tanks, 500 aircraft, numerous helicopters, loads of armoured vehicles and artillery pieces along with our 'flag ship'."

"Wow! What about NATO?"

"They haven't turned up yet."

dgar, 1 year ago to random

dgar, 1 year ago (edited 1 year ago) to random

Oh, FFS.

Photo credit: @tilton

dgar, 1 year ago to random

Y’all be sure to listen to at least one Dgar song today, okay?
☝️😅🤘

#Dgar #WishfulThinking #TheFunniestJokeYet #AintGonnaHappen

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/dgarmusic

Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/au/artist/dgar/1534169037

YouTube Topic: https://youtube.com/channel/UCODHoyCwEoGged7UU0FSjKg

YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/@JonDgar

Tidal: https://tidal.com/artist/21571623

Deezer: https://deezer.page.link/rD9kbQYQBeFg2rbG9

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0oeCPGv32IomKqc7zB6u36

dgar, 1 year ago to music

I tooted Hello World on November 30, 2022.

Then I began tooting my #music and a ton of #puns #jokes, and #memes. And you all responded so genuinely, and with such positivity, that I very quickly was made to feel at home.

My deepest gratitude goes out to the #Mastodon community, a #community that has literally improved the quality of my time on this spinning rock as it hurtles through space, towards a future that seems more uncertain every day. It’s unlike any other “social media platform” here.

Today, I celebrate the arbitrary milestone of five thousand followers, and I just wanted to say thank you.

Thank you for the favourites, the boosts, the follows, and the comments.

Thank you for your conversations, discussions, and corrections.

Thank you for listening to my music and sharing your thoughts on it with me, and for following along on your chosen streaming service. This has been amazing.

But, above all, I’d like to thank you all for making Mastodon the friendly and welcoming place that it is. My experience here is one of wonderful acceptance, and it has been truly humbling. There is nowhere else quite like it.

Massive big huge love to you all,

• Jon (Dgar)