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dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar
rood,
@rood@aus.social avatar

@dgar it's its own reward, I guess.

I think looser might come loose and be a loser in the end tho

dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar

@lemming 🤭

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

The Book of Cat
by Andy Robinson.

I steal their jokes so I’m giving their book a plug.

Link to the paperback on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.com.au/Book-CAT-Andy-Robinson/dp/0645493937

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

If you have Pet Insurance and your cat has to stay overnight at the vet's, do you get a Courtesy cat?

Asking furry friend.

dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar
dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar

@jaycee
I’m not monetising my stolen content! 😅

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

I can always count on my calculator.

Kahte,
@Kahte@masto.bike avatar

@dgar Bisous du lundi Dgar 😘😘😘😘

dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar

@Kahte 🤗🥰

dgar, (edited ) to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

The place I’m working for is looking to hire an IT infrastructure technician.
If this sounds like you, and you’re interested in a lifestyle change from the big city, drop me a DM for the deets.

DanielEriksson,
@DanielEriksson@mstdn.science avatar

@dgar @clintvs
I passed through Gladstone on the way to Heron Island. Nice place!

dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar

@DanielEriksson @clintvs
✌️😁👍

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

The other half asked me if I could clear the kitchen table.

I had to get a running start but, the answer is yes.

amiserabilist,
@amiserabilist@med-mastodon.com avatar
dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar
dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

Dong. Ding Dong.
~ James Bond’s doorbell.

luis_in_brief,
@luis_in_brief@social.coop avatar

@dgar groan (also immediately sent to siblings)

dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar
dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

I was going to buy a pocket calculator.

Then I realised that l don’t have that many pockets.

Lichtenbergian,
@Lichtenbergian@mastodon.sdf.org avatar
dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar
dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar
prefec2,
@prefec2@norden.social avatar

@dgar Punctuation marks can save lives.

xs4me2,
@xs4me2@mastodon.social avatar

@dgar Sure…

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

Southern lights? Yeah, sure, okay, here ya go…

ronanmcd,
@ronanmcd@mastodon.green avatar

@dgar majestic

mina,
@mina@berlin.social avatar

@dgar

Actually, yesterday they were southern lights in Ushuaia, Argentina (the world's southernmost town at 54°S).

https://cdn.jwplayer.com/previews/Sqr9FRnA

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

Stationary supplies turned up and they’ve given me cardboard instead of paper.

I’m writing them a stiff letter.

Kahte,
@Kahte@masto.bike avatar

@dgar Bisous du dimanche mon Dgar 😘 😘 😘 😘

dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar

@Kahte 🤗

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

Tried tap dancing once.

Kept falling into the bath.

katzenberger,
@katzenberger@social.tchncs.de avatar

@dgar Please progress slowly - try lap dancing first.

dgar,
@dgar@aus.social avatar
dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

Sick chemist?

If you can’t tritium.

If you can’t helium.

If you can’t curium.

You gotta barium.

Kahte,
@Kahte@masto.bike avatar

@dgar Bisous du samedi Dgar 😘 😘 😘 😘

sharky5740,

@dgar Tellurium they're a Boron. They didn't know what they Hafnium until they Argon.

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

Burned my Hawaiian pizza.

Should have used Aloha temperature.

gpnaturephotos,
@gpnaturephotos@aus.social avatar

@dgar That’ll teach you to put pineapple on a pizza!

haploc,
@haploc@fedi.cr-net.be avatar

@dgar "how to burn 800 calories in just 30 minutes?"

dgar, to random
@dgar@aus.social avatar

As a kid, I’d eat yeast and sit in the oven.

That’s just how I was raised.

timrichards,
@timrichards@aus.social avatar

@dgar You might say you were self-raising

fkamiah17,
@fkamiah17@toot.wales avatar

@dgar Got a classic for your Dad jokes collection ...

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