Flash

Flash, 10 months ago to random

HOW TO SURVIVE THE HEATWAVE:

1. Stay hydrated.
2. Have an ice cream cone.
3. Dismantle the fossil fuel industry which is literally burning the planet for the short term profit of a vanishingly small capitalist class.
4. Wear loose clothing.

Flash, 9 months ago to random

HOW TO SURVIVE THE HEATWAVE:

1. Stay hydrated.
2. Have an ice cream cone.
3. Dismantle the fossil fuel industry which is literally burning the planet for the short term profit of a vanishingly small capitalist class.
4. Wear loose clothing.

Flash, 6 months ago (edited 6 months ago) to random

Follow me for more recipes……

Flash, 10 months ago to random

I'm assuming that 403 years ago this person died very unexpectedly.

Flash, 1 month ago to random

A street artist draws a work of art: "the invisibility of poverty". A masterpiece. The artist’s name is Kevin Lee.

Flash, 9 months ago to random

A moist owlette.

Flash, 9 months ago to random

Has anyone ever noticed the irony behind “hyphenated” and “non-hyphenated”? .

Flash, 10 months ago to random

Last summer when it got so hot in Missouri, one woman started freezing bowls of ice and putting them out for the squirrels in her yard. This little guy was so grateful, he fell asleep cooling off on top of one. ❤️

Flash, 5 months ago to random

I've started investing in stocks: beef, chicken, vegetable...
One day I hope to become a bouillonaire.

Flash, 2 months ago to random

Flash, 9 months ago to random

Little donkeys having a busy day.

Flash, 7 months ago to random

Home security reminder.
A lot of people are arranging to go away for Christmas which makes their homes easy pickings for burglars. For security reasons I strongly recommend that you leave one of your children behind to construct a series of elaborate booby traps and defend your property.

Flash, 1 year ago to random

Me: I think I'Il open this kitchen drawer.

Potato masher: The fuck you will.

Flash, 2 months ago to random

Flash, 5 months ago to random

Flash, 5 months ago to random

If there is watermelon why isn't there firemelon, airmelon and earthmelon.
You know…the elemelons.

Flash, 7 months ago to random

Cashier: "Would you like to donate $2 to end world hunger?”

Me: "Of course. Holy shit, I had no idea we were that close.”

Flash, 3 months ago to random

Happy Sunday from Canada.

Flash, 1 year ago to random

If you’re having a bad day, here’s a Hedgehog on a camping trip to cheer you up.

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Flash, 6 months ago to random

A man who broke his neck outdoors in freezing conditions survived lying in snow for nearly 24 hours thanks to his dog, who kept him warm through the night and barked for help. Anticipating a journey of only several metres, the man was wearing just long johns, a shirt and slippers when he went outside, temperature being around -4C. However, he slipped and broke his neck. Kelsey, five-year-old Golden Retriever, kept him warm by lying on top of him, and kept him awake by licking his hands and face.

Flash, 8 months ago to random

I'm giving up eating chocolate for a month.

Sorry, bad punctuation.
Should be:
I'm giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

Flash, 8 months ago to random

In the 1960’s I fell off my bike and hurt my knee. I'm telling you this now because we didn't have Mastodon then.

Flash, 7 months ago to random

And just like that, Grandma was off the list for church fundraisers.

Flash, 5 months ago to random

Tip for today: If you can't think of a word say, "I forget the English word for it". That way people will think you're bilingual instead of an idiot.

Flash, 4 months ago to random

The world's oldest tree is a Great Basin bristlecone pine, growing in the Inyo National Forest in California. It is 4854 years old.
This tree germinated while the Old Kingdom of Ancient Egypt was flourishing and predates most of written human history. It's older than the Olmec civilisation, older than the first Chinese writing, older than Stonehenge.