@melissagreen@chaosfem.tw
@melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

melissagreen

@melissagreen@chaosfem.tw

Hot sauce bitch. Surly stew crone.

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rooster, to random
@rooster@chaosfem.tw avatar

deleted_by_author

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    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @rooster 😬

    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @rooster only 'good' thing - the shampoos and ointments and whatnot are a LOT less unpleasant than they used to be.

    JoscelynTransient, to trans
    @JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

    TRANS FEM FRIENDS: What do you wish you could say to the person you were before transition who thought it was impossible to ever actually be a girl or be fem?

    I sometimes think back and find myself at a loss at what would have supported that girl best. She was so sad, hopeless, and often dissociated or in fight/flight/freeze/fawn over her distress with how she felt like she couldn't fit in the world. And like, I know "it gets better" or "it really is possible" wouldn't have gotten through.

    I talk to a lot of young trans folks who go through this still every day, and so would appreciate others thoughts on this!

    #Trans #TransFem #TransWoman #TDOV #Transgender

    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @JoscelynTransient Mine would be very simple and specific. "If you are waiting for someone to die before revealing who you are because you know they will never accept you, well, honey, that relationship is toxic."

    The thing is, I was right. My parent's disowned me the moment I came out to them. We were already estranged at that point (for other reasons), which gave me the space to understand that while not having them in my life makes me deeply sad, I could still have a life without them. One I would really want to live.

    If this seems harsh, that's because it is harsh. I wish every day I could get a hug from my Mum as my true self, but it will never happen.

    If I could have seen the whole shape of this when I was 27 and desperate to transition, maybe things would have been different.

    samxavia, to trans
    @samxavia@lethallava.land avatar

    Share your favorite thing about Transitioning so far?

    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @samxavia Just.. being who I am, existing, as a woman, every minute of every day...

    oh, ok, ya got me. It's the boobs.

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Transition takes a while - 3. maybe 5 years. sometimes longer. Everyone has a different path and a different schedule, but here is my advice to you.

    No not you, the transitioner... YOU. the person who knows someone who is transitioning:

    You are super lucky. You have the opportunity to watch a friend or loved one grow into themselves, physically, mentally, emotionally. You can watch them open up, become themselves, literally COME ALIVE before your eyes in ways you might not have thought possible.

    And it is beautiful. One of the most beautiful journeys a person can take. The journey to Themself. Not a mystical island. Not a distant city. Themself. You get to watch that. And support it. And be there for them.

    There is profound beauty to the trans experience. Beauty and joy. A thousand tiny ohs that lead to a whole person.

    And you can be there, holding their hand.

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    What 4 years of HRT does to a girl

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Do I have transition regret? Yes. I regret not transitioning 20 or 30 years earlier.

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Interstellar diplomacy 💜

    #trans #cosplay #Trek #awesomecon2024

    Melissa, a nerd
    Melissa, SNW away mission uniform
    Live long and prosper!

    melissagreen, to random
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Tonight I am drinking a Slovenian Sauvignon Blanc…
    And whoever missed the opportunity to just brand it Slovenian Blanc is a fucking criminal

    rooster, to random
    @rooster@chaosfem.tw avatar

    deleted_by_author

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    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @rooster "You'll grow boobs"
    "I want that!"
    "But you'll also cry big snotty tears at the least provocation"
    "I want that, too"
    "So you might wanna... wait, what?"

    melissagreen, to HashtagGames
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    And the weather tomorrow on Alderaan will be…


    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Be very aware... abortion rights and trans rights are closely intertwined. It's about bodily autonomy. It's about whether you, as a person, get a say in what happens to your body, or whether a bunch of old white men get to use their religion card on you.

    Trans Rights are Human Rights
    Women's Rights are Human Rights
    Bodily Autonomy For Everyone

    That's all.

    melissagreen, to HashtagGames
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Anything by Nicholas Nickelback

    melissagreen, to HashtagGames
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Let's Oliver Again (like we did last summer)

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    The real question is, why do we even have gender markers on ID anyway? What purpose do they serve?

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    If you are not a doctor, say, maybe a lawyer...

    and you are down at the Texas Supreme Court, arguing against gender affirming care...

    and your claim is that evidence and opinions from every major medical association in favor of the benefits of said care should be disregarded because those organizations have been "idealogically captured"...

    and if instead you cite fabricated evidence and refuted studies from a bunch of religiously affiliated groups with names that sound like legitimate medical organizations but are very much not...

    then maybe it is YOU who has been "idealogically captured".

    Just sayin'

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Having a good hair day 💜

    rooster, to random
    @rooster@chaosfem.tw avatar

    deleted_by_author

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    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @rooster 🙌

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    Five years ago, my wife posted a picture of me to Facebook, and it broke me inside. I realized I had no relation to that person. That wasn't me. I had to stop hiding.

    Five years later, here I am.

    Here's to living and growing and never giving up on ourselves. 💜​

    #trans #transtimeline

    Me

    Impossible_PhD, to random
    @Impossible_PhD@hachyderm.io avatar

    I've been quiet yesterday and today, after the HP/Deadname card fiasco.

    Things with the in-laws got worse after that.

    I won't be getting into details, but I'm going no contact with someone and low contact with most of the rest as a result of their choices. Even after what they've done to me, they deserve their privacy.

    Twenty years of love and investment in that family. I'm absolutely heartbroken.

    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @Impossible_PhD I'm so sorry, Zoe. 💜​

    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @Impossible_PhD also, absolutely FUCK them.

    melissagreen, to HashtagGames
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    John Mastodon wrote the original script for the Nativity Play, and he gets royalties every time someone says "I'm sorry, there's no room at this inn".


    Lucia, to trans
    @Lucia@eldritch.cafe avatar

    Today a younger gentleman, a cashier at one of my stops, addressed me as "Madame."

    An absolutely ridiculous word, but I'll fucking take it 😂

    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @Lucia You know what melts me every fucking time?

    Miss.

    You want me to melt? Throw me a Miss.

    melissagreen, to trans
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    When I post a timeline, I will almost invariably get at least one comment along the lines of "you look great in both pictures", and whereas I think it usually is coming from a supportive place, it forces me to do emotional labor, and that's not great.

    Let me explain.

    In those pre-transition pictures, I was borderline suicidal. I was clinically depressed for decades. Anti-depressants masked it for a while. I refused to do therapy, because I already knew what I needed and I knew I couldn't have it.

    For. Decades.

    I would look in the mirror and feel I was disfigured. That someone else was looking back. That I was looking at a shell surrounding a body of pure hurt.

    It took transition and a couple of years of living as my true self, the person I always knew myself to be, to be able to look at pre-transition photos of myself without reliving those feelings. Now, with time and distance, yeah, I was a decent looking guy. But I was never a guy.

    So. Please don't do that. 💜​

    melissagreen,
    @melissagreen@chaosfem.tw avatar

    @jessica I shared that primarily because I've seen comments like those on other trans timelines, and I just wanted to raise awareness that what can be intended as a supportive comment can in fact be a source of hurt or discomfort.

    These days it is a minor annoyance to me at most, but having had a therapist at one point literally say "you are a good looking guy, why would you want to become an ugly woman?", I would rather do what little I can to raise awareness that this particular form of comment can be problematic. 💜

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