the_etrain

the_etrain, 5 months ago to random

I'm just going to subtoot this entire visit to SIL's. First, it's 66F in this house. Get real you have company.

the_etrain, 1 year ago to random

Developing an app that's just a CAPTCHA test you can use with potential lovers so you don't accidentally sleep with a robot.

the_etrain, 8 months ago to random

See, this is my brand of insomnia. Not the can't get to sleep kind. The wake up at 3:30am and your brain's like "lol, no you're not falling back asleep" kind.

the_etrain, 3 months ago to random

Look kid, you've either sprinted through a Kmart because of a blue light special or you haven't. I can't describe that magic to you.

the_etrain, 6 months ago to random

Sooooo....what's everyone getting for their Mastodon birthday?

the_etrain, 6 months ago to random

There should be an option to make your Roomba swear when it bumps into things.

the_etrain, 1 month ago to random

Possible headlines:

Pecker takes center stage
Pecker exceeds expectations
Pecker does serious damage
Pecker grilled by prosecution
Pecker reveals everything

the_etrain, 8 months ago to random

DJing for my kids tonight...
Next up
https://songwhip.com/luscious-jackson/naked-eye

the_etrain, 3 months ago to random

Mr. T designed these. It's the only explanation.

the_etrain, 7 months ago (edited 7 months ago) to random

I, uh. Wow. OK! Point taken, please return to your seat, sir.

Arizona dad strips down to crop top and shorts at board meeting to protest school dress code
https://news.yahoo.com/arizona-dad-strips-down-crop-171313075.html

the_etrain, 7 months ago to random

Top 5 choices for next Speaker of the House:
5. Quatto
4. Master Blaster
3. Pete Rose
2. Morton Downey Jr. circa 1988

1. Freddy Krueger

the_etrain, 6 months ago to random

Mike Johnson says "harbinger of chaos and sexual anarchy" like it's a bad thing. I'm about to put that shit in my bio.

the_etrain, 3 months ago (edited 3 months ago) to random

Talking in real life here....
Have you seen truck nuts in the past month or so?

the_etrain, 10 months ago to random

Let's be honest. Boosting toots is consistently in the top 3 things you'll do on any given day.

the_etrain, 3 months ago to random

Family dinner thread. We'll see where this goes. I will say, I haven't see this much flannel since 1993.

the_etrain, 7 months ago to random

Starting my own platform called Wombat. In the current iteration, we just tape notes to rocks and throw them at each other.

the_etrain, 2 months ago to random

There should be a YouTube channel dedicated to reactions of old farts being shown pictures of people with non-traditional hair styles and colors.

the_etrain, 7 months ago to random

Hey girl, is your file extension PDF? Cause you're Pretty Damn Fine.

the_etrain, 3 months ago to random

Feels like a Pantera kind of day.

the_etrain, 6 months ago to random

These are the geography based band names I can think of:
Asia
Europe
Japan
Alabama
Boston
Kansas
White Zombie
Metallica
Slayer

the_etrain, 7 months ago to random

I could see doing ok in the 50s because nobody knew bacon and cigarettes were bad for you, then you just died and your doctor used your still burning cigarette to light his.

the_etrain, 1 month ago to random

Once Hollywood has cycled through board games, they should make movies based on breakfast cereals.

the_etrain, 3 months ago to random

If you boost someone's toot, your souls become inextricably intertwined. Your fates are now bound together for eternity. Seems drastic, I know, but I don't make the rules.

the_etrain, 8 months ago to random

My boss prints emails, writes notes on them, and hands them to me.

the_etrain, 1 month ago to random

I really did not want to go for a jog today. I did it anyway. Please clap.