@Wileymiller@mastodon.social
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Wileymiller

@Wileymiller@mastodon.social

Creator of the syndicated comic strip, “Non Sequitur".
If your newspaper is so horrifically bad that it doesn't carry #NonSequitur, you can read it every day at: https://www.gocomics.com/nonsequitur

Then call the editor of the paper and raise hell until they carry Non Sequitur.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

Wileymiller, to random
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So let's see if I have The Orange Turd's defense being presented right...the one night (minute) stand with Stormy Daniels NEVER took place, but they had her sign an NDA to not divulge it and paid her $130k to keep her quiet about this event that never happened to keep his family from hearing about it.

The objective here, of course, is to convince just ONE juror who is stupid and gullible enough to buy it.

GottaLaff, to TeslaMotors
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🤨Elon Changes Tune on Superchargers After Mass Firing

Last week, he dismissed virtually the entire charging division

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2024-05-10/elon-musk-changes-tune-on-tesla-superchargers-after-mass-firing

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Another stable genius

GottaLaff, to legal
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#TrumpTrial 🧵 starts HERE. #Trump #legal

Please remember I don’t reply while live-posting. Plz use NFL (Not For Laffy, but no hashtag) so I can ignore those replies.

1/

Pagliery:

Today's session starts with prosecutors asking for a sidebar with the judge. Lawyers on both sides are now discussing something in hushed tones.

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Get lots of rest over the weekend, between showings, to get ready for Monday.👊 😘

GottaLaff, to random
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ICYMI:

Lawrence O’Donnell on “the orange turd” moment at the #TrumpTrial https://www.msnbc.com/the-last-word/watch/lawrence-why-trump-s-lawyer-called-him-the-orange-turd-during-stormy-testimony-210625605606

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Oh, I loved how much fun Lawrence was having saying, "the orange turd", over and over, knowing The Orange Turd was watching.

GottaLaff, to random
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📌📌Via Kyle Griffin:

Michael Cohen will begin his testimony in the Monday, NBCNews has learned through multiple sources. He's expected to be on the stand for several days.

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Talking heads on the news keep repeating the Trump defense line as though it's fact that Cohen has credibility issues because he was convicted of lying. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't the opposite of a lie the truth? Cohen was convicted for lying about what he was doing for Trump, for Trump's benefit alone. He's now come clean about all that...which means he's now telling the truth. Someone please explain how this is a credibility issue.

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff @BlueWaver22 @dshan

I don't think they even really need to have Cohen testify. Everything about him, his role in the matter, and what's he's testified before congress has all been validated with the paper trail. What else could he possibly add to that?

GottaLaff, to TeslaMotors
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"The first invasive brain chip that Neuralink embedded into a human brain has malfunctioned, with neuron-surveilling threads appearing to have become dislodged from the participant's brain, the company revealed in a blog post Wednesday."

https://arstechnica.com/science/2024/05/elon-musks-neuralink-reports-trouble-with-first-human-brain-chip/

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
There's something wrong with anyone's brain who agreed to have this done to them.

GottaLaff, to legal
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NEW 🧵 starts HERE.

Please remember I don’t reply while live-posting. Plz use NFL (Not For Laffy, but no hashtag) so I can ignore those replies.

1/

McB:

...At 2:14 p.m., Trump walks in, entourage in tow.

Boris Epshteyn just handed a piece of paper with a photo on it to Kaitlan Collins.

I thought he maybe said "Conway" to her, but I'm not exactly sure.

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Merchan was very polite in not adding, "...asshole."

GottaLaff, to legal
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starts HERE.
Please remember I don’t reply while live-posting. Plz use NFL (Not For Laffy, but no hashtag) so I can ignore those replies.

1/… Bower:

Trump enters the courtroom. Before arriving, he lingered for a moment in the doorway, talking to his lawyers, Emile Bove and Todd Blanche. He had a piece of paper in his hand, which he waved around as he spoke.

Wait for it….

Wileymiller,
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@iuculano @GottaLaff

Mr. Blowdryer has already lost the fight before stepping into the ring with Laffy. In a battle of wits, The Orange Turd is unarmed.

GottaLaff, to random
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preamble via McBrien:

There are many, many new faces here today, and it was dog eat dog trying to get a seat in the press overflow room.

I'm sure everyone just wants to experience the pristine, modern facilities of 100 Centre St.

Just kidding, it's Stormy, duh.

To give you a sense of just how hard it was to get in today — a member of the public who sat down behind me in the press overflow room personally hired a line sitter who got here at 3am.

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Wow. So including Trump, that makes it a trifecta of turds.

Wileymiller, to random
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@GottaLaff
Here's our favorite congressman once again schooling republicans to start your day off right...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdeN7NSerMQ

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Oh, I know. That's why I wanted to make sure you saw it and bring a smile to your lovely face.

GottaLaff, to random
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Barron #Trump named delegate for Florida at Republican National Convention - UPI.com https://www.upi.com/Top_News/US/2024/05/09/Barron-Trump-delegate-Florida-Republicans/7221715257682/

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
I'm not a legal expert, but I'm pretty sure this falls under the category of child abuse.

Wileymiller, to random
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The art of the deal...finding people stupid enough to give you lots of money with zero prospect of them getting any return on their investment.

https://wapo.st/3UBf4Fy

GottaLaff, to legal
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🤦🏻‍♀️ Lawyers for Donald asked a New York appeals court to rule on their challenge to the limiting what the former president can say about witnesses in the criminal hush money trial, according to people familiar with the matter.

https://www.cnn.com/2024/05/08/politics/trump-gag-order-appeal-new-york-appeal?cid=ios_app

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Are you enjoying your day off from live tooting?

Sorry, but that still just doesn't sound right...

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
I think Judge Merchan might cite Trump for contempt if he keeps live tooting with impunity in court.

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
No, I mean the OTHER live tooting...which I understand are more like explosions with

Wileymiller, to random
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The reach for victimization is limitless in MAGA world...

A spokesperson for Giuliani, Ted Goodman, told the Guardian in a statement late Tuesday night: “While it is true that the permanent Washington political class is leveraging all of its power and influence to bully and scare people from defending Americans who are willing to stand up and push back against the accepted narrative, Mayor Giuliani will be appropriately represented when it comes to his accounting and finances.”

Wileymiller,
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Link to article:

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/article/2024/may/07/rudy-giuliani-accountant-bankruptcy?CMP=share_btn_url

Wileymiller, to random
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This is what happens when a worm eats your brain...

https://wapo.st/3Wwg6VS

Wileymiller, to random
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It's SO obvious. The Deep State planted the worm in RFK jr's brain.

https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/08/us/rfk-jr-brain-health-memory-loss.html?unlocked_article_code=1.qU0.NUj_.8YmHTC3F9nfd&smid=url-share

Wileymiller, to random
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@GottaLaff
Hope things are better this morning. 🇨🇦 🐶

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff 😘 👊

Wileymiller, to random
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@GottaLaff
https://wapo.st/3UoH2Ew

Bob Mankoff illustrated Judge Cannon perfectly with his classic cartoon...

Wileymiller,
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@GottaLaff
Here...🍷 🍷

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