burgerdrome

burgerdrome, 8 months ago to random

I love my smart TV. I love the way it takes a long time to boot up because it's trying to refresh the advertisements on the home screen. I delight in the way it randomly restarts because it's downloaded an update without asking me, each of which makes the TV slower and slower with every subsequent install. I adore the way it buries the apps that I want to use, and that I use without fail every single time, below the apps that it's being paid to promote and which I have never touched in my life and would never use without the cold metal of a glock pressed hard against my sweating temple. I am infinitely thrilled by the way the interface lags constantly, due to the need to have one thousand unnecessary animations rendered on hardware ripped wholesale from a ten year old phone. I feel myself borne aloft on wings of pure joy when I am notified that my data will be collected and analysed to determine my useage patterns. Even now I am writing this from a field of beautiful flowers and soft luscious grass as I lie and look up happily at the bright blue sky, smiling happily to know that this is the future of technology

burgerdrome, 3 months ago to random

Tumblr's moderators falsely flagged a trans woman's completely clothed and non-sexual pre- and post-transition photos as 'explicit content' and refused to rescind the ban, so she posted that she hopes the CEO "dies a painful death involving a car covered in hammers that explodes multiple times and the hammers go everywhere". The CEO of Tumblr is currently having a very public and extended meltdown about this, and is claiming that the Wile E. Coyote ass scenario of CEO Car Hammer Explosion was a "credible death threat" which required the intervention of the FBI and has banned the woman in question. He has spent the last few hours being Definitely Not Mad Online in all of the comments and replies. Truly incredible next levels of Silicon Valley Bro brain

decryption, 2 days ago to random

Yet another person is using my gmail address with a dot in the username thinking it is theirs - this time it's enrolling their kid in school. Normally I do nothing but should I do something here? I have the damn kids birth cert, full details of the family, etc.

burgerdrome, 2 months ago to random

"we were previously wasting shit-tons of energy blasting cold air into the world, but money is no longer free so we've re-discovered 'fridges with doors on them'. hopefully this big sign reduces the amount of sheer bafflement you experience at having to open a door"

burgerdrome, 4 months ago to random

ME: I think I might become one of those grim, taciturn old men who speak only in foreboding, ominous sentences

MY WIFE: I do not want this. I cannot stress enough that I will divorce you if you do this

ME: Hm. So it begins

burgerdrome, 8 months ago to random

corporations are so fucking needy. "hi Tim, we want your feedback on a recent purchase" lol get a life. I've moved on

burgerdrome, 11 months ago to random

you claim to support openness, and yet you refuse to open your doors to the Proprietary Surveillance Capitalism Private Data Harvesting Network Owned By A Global Megacorporation With A Verifiable Track Record Of Nightmarish Activities Up To And Including Enabling Genocide? How Curious

the guy from the We Should Improve Society Somewhat comic (ref https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/1259257-we-should-improve-society-somewhat)

burgerdrome, 4 days ago to random

whenever I am forced to look at LinkedIn I can only imagine that I have the contorted, screaming face of someone who is in a fantasy movie and is looking deeper and deeper into The Cursed Orb or whatever and refusing to let go even though it's obviously killing them. with each turn of the scroll wheel I sink a little deeper into the madness, feeling myself overwhelmed by the slick achievements of others, my blood boiling at the midwit business insights of the rest. then just as suddenly it is gone and I can breathe again, and I remember my family loves me, and there is hope for a better world

burgerdrome, 1 month ago to random

NOBODY:

ABSOLUTELY NOBODY:

NOBODY AT ALL:

TV COMEDY WRITER: I should write a joke about how ska music is embarassing and cringey

decryption, 8 days ago to random

If you are in Adelaide this is the place to watch Furiosa. Amazing audio.

burgerdrome, 7 months ago to random

happy with how the test colour scheme for my Renegade-But-Not-Chaos Imperial Guard kill team is shaping up!

a ratty looking little man with a grey and yellow uniform. he is holding a grenade in his right hand a little gun in his left hand. ooh he's so well painted isn't he

burgerdrome, 9 months ago to random

it's absolutely monstrous that we allow targeted advertising to exist honestly. a remotely just society would simply outlaw the practice immediately and never look back. to do so would cost precisely zero jobs and have an almost immediate net mental health gain. simply a disgusting industry that should not be allowed to exist

burgerdrome, 3 months ago to random

just mis-typed "wealth management" as "wraith management" and have accidentally invented a great new genre

burgerdrome, 1 year ago to random

I don't think news needs to be more complicated than this. If you're sending me information which is harder to understand than this, I simply won't process it

burgerdrome, 1 month ago to random

sorry how many partners. sorry can you say that number again. sorry just more slowly this time

burgerdrome, 22 days ago to random

Notion crowbarring AI into my workspace is going well so far

burgerdrome, 10 months ago to random

laughing about the name 'pregolas the elf' while simultaneously knowing that I will never, under any circumstances, google it

burgerdrome, 9 months ago to random

not to be unnecessarily inflammatory on the TL but if every music and record label executive was assassinated tomorrow the world would measurably improve

burgerdrome, 1 year ago to random

americans love to say things like "I just opened a box in my attic" or "I'm just going down into the basement". they can't get enough of being above or below their houses

burgerdrome, 6 months ago to random

Black Friday! That wonderful time of year when you learn just how many companies have your email address

burgerdrome, 3 months ago to random

the tumblr CEO losing his mind over Operation Car Hammer Explosion has reminded me of the time on Twitter that I said "Oh, fuck offff" to famous fantasy author RA Salvatore and he was so offended that he sent a DM to the other person in the conversation to check if my account had been hacked because there was no other reason for using such language

burgerdrome, 8 days ago to random

having a good time in Baldur's Gate 3

a muscular half-orc's impressive junk and bright red underpants are visible out of focus in the background of this scene. he is standing behind a leather-clad, blood-stained man who is on his knees.
a nude, muscular half-orc's with fantastic musculature and bright red underpants kneels on the floor in front of an evil priestess. he is wearing a fucked-up rumpled old wizards hat.

burgerdrome, 8 days ago to random

implementing a new machine learning feature where a silicon valley investor gives me $10,000 and I use it to buy a new gaming "machine" and the investor "learns" that they shouldn't have done that

burgerdrome, 7 days ago to random

Been smashing out some models for D&D lately using quick and dirty contrast paint jobs, which has been fun! We’ve got a Reaper Bones giant (terrible model. shithouse), a 3D printed troll, and a squad of WHFB ogres which I have kitbashed together to all have unique weapon options for better D&D games. Stay tuned!

5 different beefy ogres with brutish weapons and bad attitude!!
A blue-skinned giant in gleaming gold armour holding a large pale blue sword

burgerdrome, 10 days ago to random

here's the team of experts who review all of my posts before they go live by the way. if you even care