@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

joelvanderwerf

@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social

Mathematician. Applying semigroup theory to distributed computing, convergent replication.

Bay Area and SF content: https://sfba.social/@joelvanderwerf

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

futurebird, to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

The disturbing thing about ant technology is it's all ants.

The fridge? It's an ant.
Your tank? It's an ant.
Your boat? It's you, and other ants.
Your house? The walls are ants.
Your weed control for your garden? Tiny ants?
Your glue gun? It's an ant (a baby ant!)

So advanced high tech ants would have ant guns, and ant spaceships. Advanced ants would have ant computers for ants, made of ants. Advanced ants would have ants for storing data.

And ant bombs.

Wait! Those already exist!

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@futurebird The cloud is somebody else's ant.

joelvanderwerf, to climate
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

"A hidden force supercharged this Alabama flood -- and threatens the Anerican South"

Spoiler: the "hidden force" is climate change and the resulting sea-level rise.

It's sad that the WaPo needs to use click-bait headlines to get people to read about the greatest crisis humanity has ever faced. I hope it works.

https://wapo.st/44iCuEi

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

Regular readers of the WaPo can be forgiven for expecting that the "hdden force" might turn out to be Taylor Swift fans, or a new technique for loading your dishwasher.

hyc, to random
@hyc@mastodon.social avatar

Most sci-fi stories involving time travel involve a mechanism that's incredibly rare and/or difficult to operate.

What if complete plans for a working time machine, including its power source, were published anonymously on the web, in a decentralized fashion? (Impossible to identify who published it, or from where, and thus making it impossible to go back and prevent the publication.) What if anybody could build their own, using commonly available parts and tools?

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@hyc Maybe like Jaunting in Bester's The Stars My Destination, something which can be learned by anyone even without special equipment.

joelvanderwerf, to mastodon
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

Huh. Is there no way to copy ALT text from a post?

joelvanderwerf, to random
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

Wanna know how you get a doom loop? Let cities like Grants Pass make it illegal to be homeless, so the affected people go to a city like Portland, which is probably not going to pass such a law (yet), causing the pressure there to increase, making everybody angry and miserable until Portland passes the law, and then ...

Meanwhile, Tucker Carlson is saying "look how much worse the libberul cities are now".


futurebird, to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

I was talking to my husband today about antkeeping and in the course of explaining a complex colony rehoming (see the "innocent" twins I posted that colony is nearly 2k strong and CRAZY) I happened to say "anytime you open a port to a space that contains ants, ants come out of it."

He found this VERY funny for some reason and is now calling it "The Ironclad Law of Antkeeping: anytime you open something full of ants, ants come out."

I mean... he has a point. I guess.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@justafrog @futurebird

Ants Abhor is the town around the University of Michigants

GottaLaff, to random
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

🤢Oh geez. Sorry for TMI, but Meiselas is reporting this:

Meiselas: What I’m hearing from credible sources is that Donald is actually farting in the courtroom… I’m hearing it from actual credible people that as he’s kind of falling asleep, he’s actually passing gas and that his lawyers are really struggling with the smell.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@GottaLaff Maybe the jurors were cold earlier because they had the ventilation system up to max?

MissingThePt, to random
@MissingThePt@mastodon.social avatar

Tesla Cybertruck deliveries reportedly halted until it is determined how occupants keep escaping.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@MissingThePt The all-metal pedal was the problem: nobody knew how to "put the pedal to the metal".

joelvanderwerf, to climate
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

"""
“I can’t feel despair because the saltbush is here, living its life in the heat, and if the saltbush can keep going, then I can keep going.”

Or, at the very least, she can collect seeds, literally and spiritually, to prepare for the hard times that will inevitably return.
"""

https://wapo.st/49H9F5f

#DeathValley #ClimateChange #florespondence

joelvanderwerf, to random
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

I looked at a headline about "tradwives" and somehow I saw "tardiwives"....

I would really rather be reading a pulpy Sci Fi story entitled "I Married A Water-bear".

MissingThePt, to random
@MissingThePt@mastodon.social avatar

Breaking: O.J. Simpson’s body to be laid to rest in a white Ford Bronco that is launched to sea and then set on fire.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@MissingThePt Mouthing "It just doesn't fit" to Satan as he struggles in his own personal hell-pit.

ai6yr, to random

My sense of smell has gotten a lot better in the last few years (don't ask me why, but probably NOT working in an office). That said, taking a walk around the neighborhood you know how the dogs must feel.

"Ah, Amazon driver with too much cologne passed here an hour ago. PU!"

"Hmm, looks like that teenager girl with way too much perfume walked this way"

"Oh, the neighbors took a shower about 10 minutes ago"

"A baby with a dirty diaper in a stroller passed this way 30 minutes ago... Don't the parents know?!"

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@ai6yr Same. It may be masking, indoor air filtering, and not having even a cold for 4 years. But it also might be mental attention: if I'm outside and smell shampoo, I've trained myself to consider whether I'm too close to somebody.

ai6yr, to delhi

Unintended release of Chinook into a river in Oregon, due to a traffic accident. (minor injuries to the driver, and not all the Chinook made it into the river... but the ones that did should survive).

Oregon Department of Fish and Wildlife: "On March 29 near Lookingglass Hatchery in northeast Oregon, a fish tanker truck was involved in an accident while transporting approximately 102,000 spring Chinook smolts for release in the Imnaha River.... The accident occurred alongside Lookingglass Creek, a tributary of the Grande Ronde River. About 77,000 smolts made it into the creek when the tanker overturned"

https://www.dfw.state.or.us/news/2024/04_Apr/040224.asp

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@ai6yr "On the count of three, everybody swim left!"

GottaLaff, to random
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

🤦🏻‍♀️ weighs limiting ’s access at this summer’s convention

It is the latest fallout from Ronna ’s ouster from the network.
Read in POLITICO: https://apple.news/A6fLcl_uRQ8ybC3mbOSj46Q

https://apple.news/A6fLcl_uRQ8ybC3mbOSj46Q

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@cindyweinstein @GottaLaff They're making it clear for us, in case we missed noticing that McDaniel is still a GOP operative, regardless of day job.

MissingThePt, to random
@MissingThePt@mastodon.social avatar

Breaking: Mike Johnson announces that if he loses the Speakership he will leave Congress to spend more time with his son monitoring each other’s porn intake.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@MissingThePt his johnson is mic'd

MissingThePt, to random
@MissingThePt@mastodon.social avatar

Elon Musk wishes Tesla could be more like high-end German car companies (having a history of assisting the Nazi war effort).

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@MissingThePt saying the quiet part in parentheses

lauren, to random
@lauren@mastodon.laurenweinstein.org avatar

If Trump and Biden ever debate, they should both be required to speak exclusively in Old English.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@lauren I'd settle for tough-guy patter from 1940s movies.

lauren, to random
@lauren@mastodon.laurenweinstein.org avatar

Used the word "cowardice" on one post and "cowardness" on another. Then suddenly wondered if the latter was correct. Yeah, it is, just "out of favor" these days.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@kcivey @lauren "cowardity" crosses a line, though

GottaLaff, to random
@GottaLaff@mastodon.social avatar

Good.

says he regrets referring to 'an illegal' during his State of the Union address https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/biden-says-regrets-reference-illegal-state-union-address-rcna142561

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@GottaLaff Between the guy who is capable of regret and the guy who isn't capable of regret, choose the one who is.

MissingThePt, to random
@MissingThePt@mastodon.social avatar

Oh, I annoy you? Well guess what mister, I annoy me too.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@MissingThePt Is it Ann again? You can't spell annoy without Ann. Oy!

MissingThePt, to random
@MissingThePt@mastodon.social avatar

Now that RNC chair Ronna McDaniel has announced her resignation she can go back to using her full name, Ronna Hussein McDaniel.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@MissingThePt I thought it was Mitt Ronna McDaniel?

ai6yr, to SanFrancisco

Oh my.

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@ai6yr It's raining like SoCal here!

ai6yr, (edited ) to random

Satellite imaging showing how much Badwater Basin in Death Valley National Park has refilled (via NASA). https://earthobservatory.nasa.gov/images/152448/badwater-basin-refills?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=mastodon&utm_campaign=mastodon&linkId=325812372

joelvanderwerf,
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@ai6yr Wow, August 2023 was wet in Death Valley!

(Map generated by selecting August 2023 in the Archive panel on the lower right of https://www.cnrfc.noaa.gov/ol.php?product=PPM&zoom=7&lat=35.973&lng=-116.646)

joelvanderwerf, to random
@joelvanderwerf@mastodon.social avatar

@Hey_Beth @w7voa

Just let @realGulDukat take it from here.

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