@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

NatalyaD

@NatalyaD@disabled.social

I am a deaf and disabled cis bi woman living in the UK. I am interested in disability rights practice and law, assistive technology, cats (always cats) and I am fuelled by lots of tea.

My profile picture is a red lizard for no reason other than I like it.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

Well my meeting with the pro-bono psychotherapist was a bust. He doesn’t believe in bipolar and thinks it’s basically a marketing ploy by Big Pharma. So that’s really not a good fit with me and my worldview, the diagnosis makes sense of my experiences in a way no other explanation has. Guess I will have to shop around for a therapist.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma fucking hell, that's not good. That's highly irresponsible and should be something they advertise clearly in advance.

Hope you can find other psychs with more appropriate knowledge and beliefs to work with.

NatalyaD, to random
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

Rebooting my work machine cos Outlook keeps maxing out CPU and hanging. Windows and Microsoft are not ready for the desktop.

NatalyaD, to random
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

Pain spike. So much for getting some shit done. Fair wodge of codeine, heat and now diazepam but I still can't turn my head properly. Typing isn't great.

I'm half wondering if this is partly migraine sending my pain receptors haywire. Chucked it in the migraine log along with today's visual disturbances.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma They asked me to keep a migraine diary 4 weeks before I started a new treatment to determine if it's working - they didn't bother telling me before that...

My migraines aren't always classic, if I get a full on scotoma I'm really triggered by something like flickering light (which I avoid like the plague) but I get a lot of low level visual shit all the time. Last month I had a 2 week daily cluster of migraines, possibly worsened by hospital access stress to get my appts!

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I don't think the log is going to help cos there aren't really any patterns and I kept getting told "stop hyperfocusing on symptoms" as a cause for symptoms - Catch 22 then. If I log them, I inherently focus on them. If I ignore them, I have no record.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma Yuuup. That's why I'm litigating the repeated phoning nonsense and demanding they fix their letters/comms, website with contact details and systems that send people phone appts as part of my claim.

I figure I'm putting them on notice that I will simply keep adding to this or a new claim EVERY single time, till they fix the discrim systems they've had 30 years to fix.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma Neurology especially pisses me off cos they are often atrocious at environmental triggers and don't seem to be able to explain to me why my brain went beserk in 2016.

It's all a bit "shrug" "dunno" "brains" and I don't buy that, it seems decided incurious that they don't understand environmental triggers like lighting and so on.

Still latest migraine doc seemed more clued up than the rest, not least recognising I'd been dicked about & fixed it. Now to see if treatment works...

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I often fail to pursue, but this time I just about managed it.

I figure that if some of us with strength/capacity can/do pursue, then we help our fellow crips who can't.

It is also easier that my impairment isn't mental illness, as you guys get the "discrediting" much worse than most others. My case is fairly basic, severe/profoundly deaf person says "no phones" hospital did phones. They won't push it to court, but if they did....

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

I didn’t garden. I went back to bed where I felt much safer. I dozed fitfully, depressed dreams. Missed lunch, missed the best of the weather. Came outside to find Tom and Miss Cinnamon pottering about sorting things on the patio. I just feel useless, an onlooker

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma Productivity is not a requirement for being a good and valuable person. You tried to keep yourself safe and rest.

I too have done very little today too. Pain spike and I've broken into my diazepam stash. It is OK.

Sounds like you managed some nicer things this evening. Sending good thoughts and kindness to you.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I'm really glad you're over here cos I'm trying to extricate myself from Twitter which is stressful compared to the Fediverse which is largely nice.

I love that people can send nice messages to and from. We can't fix the shit, but we can hold space and kindness for one another till shit hopefully passes.

NatalyaD, to random
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

I spent much of today waiting for the outcome of the West Midlands Mayoral election. It was really close and I honestly thought Street (the Tory who's been trying to pretend he's not Tory really) was going to get in. Labour Richard Parker won by 1508 votes. The winner/loser results speeches were unfamiliarly Grownup Politics!

Today I also learned Andy Street is life partners with Michael Fabricant, the 'Tesco Value Boris Johnson' guy with a crap wig - MP for Lichfield. I Just Cannot Even... 🤯

ChrisMayLA6, to random
@ChrisMayLA6@zirk.us avatar

Its been clear for ages that many public service cuts are false economies.... as a friend of mine pointed out some time ago, if you cut early intervention & prevention services (which can be relatively cheap & effective), you then enlarge the demand for more expensive (and often mandatory) crisis services....

A new IFS study that looked at closing police stations, suggests, likewise that every £1 saved by closing a location increased social costs by £3!

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/article/2024/may/04/spending-cuts-are-often-false-economies-that-end-up-costing-society-dearly

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@ChrisMayLA6 A friend of mine who has regular stays in mental health institutions has found a MH gardening group once a week was lifechanging cos it gave a safe focus away from home. This has now been cut due to lack of funding. There is nothing for "care in the community" if you are severely unwell a lot of the time.

Similarly we send people out of prisons to live in shitty crime-riddled places with no house, job, money and wonder why people reoffend. It's absolute madness.

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

New piece of stellar advice just dropped! Been told by a relative to “just think happy thoughts”

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma not enough FFS or stones in their shoes for that one.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma Cos that would be too much like insight?

Or maybe she assumes cos she's crap at the basics, that you with your more serious condition aren't good at the basics, which is presumptious and annoying!

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I hate that. It's not that someone with more severe issues erases the less-severe, but sometimes people need to recognise severity.

I get this from people who fall off horses, injure a shoulder and tell me cos magic surgery fixed them, my from-birth fucked shoulder with no anatomy to fix-to should be fixable with a simple op too. Like I've not seen 2 the top hospitals in the UK about it & scared ProfSurgeons.

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

OK so wasn’t a CPN, she’s a social worker, but she’s going to support me jointly with a CPN who will come next week for at least the next few weeks. She’s v happy that I’ve taken 2 months off to try and get better. Told her I was scared of everything spiralling out of control, …ODing, running away, police being called, etc. very last thing I want is to end up in hospital god knows where and be on daily med pickups for the rest of the year. Must remember that to counter the planning.

Good news is there is sick pay for up to 12 weeks after all! I just need the SW to ask one of the doctors for medical evidence justifying my absence. She’s also going to ask about PRN sleep meds.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma Well done, that is a lot to have achieved while you are unwell. I am glad there is some sick pay too!

Hope CPN/SW can help halt any decline and spiral and help you turn things around to be better for you.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma Ugh to droppy mood despite a lift. Hope that improves soonest and you can get through the bad bit.

quixoticgeek, to random
@quixoticgeek@v.st avatar

At a team building event with a group of Pentesters. We have to put names into the scoring system. It's a selection of different injections, and cross site scripting attacks...

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@quixoticgeek snorts with laughter

Tell us more. Cheer us up!

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

My sash just arrived in the post. It says, “It’s my 50th birthday, bitches!” 😄

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I hope we'll get pics of it being used at your fab party!

Sounds brilliant.

NatalyaD, to random
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

If anyone on disabled.social Mastodon instance can afford to donate even $1USD a month to cover server fees this would help it continue. Server costs are currently bit higher than incoming donations.

See breakdown at https://disabled.social/@McCullohMD/112238329592851161

The mods of Disabled.Social have been brilliant and I want them supported.

I've upped my Patron to help. Hopefully a few others can also do this.

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

Someone said that saying “don’t not all men me” is like meeting racism with racism. Guess he believes in reverse racism then. First time I have ever told someone on Mastodon to fuck off

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I hope the next action was the blockety block button.

Fucksake to bad menz.

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

Just had this message from a friend and I am raging! “Think my running journey is over... Didn't make it2 10k as ran past a man who whistled at me & then stuck his foot out. Couldn't dodge it fast enough so went flying. Not sure I'll have the confidence to go out again
Being a woman feels really hard sometimes... 😔😔” Picture of cut lips and hand.

I have been cat called so many times running, and once a young man slapped my bum from behind and tried to pull me into the bushes, but I think this is worse. Why the fuck is women feeling powerful through running something men feel compelled to try and take away?

Do not “not all men” me

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I saw the post, fucking enraging.

Really hard to know if reporting to police is viable or not given the extra spoons that takes and the risk of victim blaming from them.

Fuck men who behave like this.

Other men who are not shits need to not minimise women's experiences and need to talk to other men another about this stuff being done to women by men and calling out their pals if they show any level of sexism cos it is all part of a wider pattern.

meganL, to accessibility
@meganL@mas.to avatar

People would think horticulture has nothing to do with accessibility, but it does.

Planting an Acanthus in this narrow spot was already a bad choice even if there were no wheelchair ramp there. You have to design your landscape for the projected mature size of the plant, not the size it is when you buy it.

But having it here and not constantly trimming it means you're just performing accessibility.

This is the entrance to an art gallery. @plants

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@meganL @plants In the UK there's a campaign for this sort of thing where people's gardens encroach onto the pedestrian footpaths and affect mobility impaired users.

Sadly our councils are all so underfunded that reporting them doesn't achieve anything.

I know cyclists who carry tools for cutting back foliage on cycle routes and similar cos they are physically able bodied and know they're a huge barrier, but not enough do this.

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

I made myself go out with Tom to buy extra wine glasses for the party. I ended up buying a keepsake box for the birthday card I hope to receive, and a wooden spinning serving platter for nibbles for the drinks party. Never go into TKMaxx if you want to come out empty handed! I’m feeling a bit better but short of patience, I was agitated in queues and now cross with myself for getting irritated with Tom in Tesco (I find supermarkets stressful and overwhelming at the best of times). I’m going to try and relax as much as possible this afternoon as we are going to a dinner party this evening.

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma What is it with TKMaxx and huge queueues at all times of day. The place is dead, but still a massive queueueue.

Haven't been in for ages cos I can't stand. Last time was when we met ppl in town with partner kindly shoving me in the wheelchair so we went in on the way home for an excellent silicone spatula which is very useful. Partner and I hate shopping so didn't buy much more thankfully!

purplepadma, to random
@purplepadma@beige.party avatar

I feel like my PhD is all going wrong and I can’t stop crying

NatalyaD,
@NatalyaD@disabled.social avatar

@purplepadma I work with disabled students, and have seen a lot of interesting PhD journeys. Your already tooted plan to have more sick leave is super wise and will not wreck your PhD. You will get there, it just might take a different path as and when your condition permits.

The fact you are engaged and supported by supervisors are all the factors that result in eventual success in spite of the challenges (and I've seen a lot rescued!).

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