@MostlyHarmless@thecanadian.social
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MostlyHarmless

@MostlyHarmless@thecanadian.social

Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult

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MostlyHarmless, to random
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Some people are like Slinky toys… not really good for anything, but you can’t help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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I don’t like the person I become when I’m tracking a UPS package.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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The only thing flat-earthers have to fear is Sphere Itself.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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Only half the world’s misery comes from ignorance. The other half comes from intelligence.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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Anyone who claims events are staged using "crisis actors" who then keep their part in the conspiracy totally secret has clearly never worked with actors.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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So in retrospect, perhaps responding to that wedding invitation with 'maybe next time' wasn’t very nice.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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Exercise is basically hurting yourself until you build up an immunity to hurting yourself.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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Just made my last car payment. I mean, I still owe a lot, but I’m just not paying anymore.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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Once I learned what calculators did, I immediately cleared the “math” part of my brain to make room for more movie quotes.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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It says something about the society in which you live when pizza arrives at your house before the cops and paramedics do.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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I would eat a lot more salads if they were made out of pizza.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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I just blew all my party money on bills again.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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If by “Hold” you mean take a moment to reflect on your poor customer service and how I should take my business elsewhere? Then yes, I’ll hold.

MostlyHarmless, to random
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MostlyHarmless, to random
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I too have decided to veto all bills that come across my desk.

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