TheBreadmonkey

RickiTarr, 3 months ago to random

Ummm Happy Black History Month...

TheBreadmonkey, 9 months ago to random

Absolutely love to see a joke get subverted by cold hard facts. You keep in real out there, fact-kings.

TheBreadmonkey, 10 months ago to random

So. I have just been made aware that square melons are a thing.

Square melon. A melon. But square.

TheBreadmonkey, 8 months ago (edited 8 months ago) to random

3 weeks to halloween and I've just put the fan on

TheBreadmonkey, 6 months ago to random

1 more week...

You better watch out.
You Better Watch Out.
YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.
Y̵̪̻̫̦͐̆O̶̟̺̾̋̅Ű̶̡̗̮̗̫̑́͐̌́͘͜ ̷̯͓̥͌B̴̺̤̥͌̽̐̄̈́̚Ḛ̸̡̨͌͂̅̌̑̈́͂ͅT̸̲̦̩͎̑ͅT̷͔̤̤̙̭͆́̈́́̈́̌͠E̶͇͋̐̈́̅̑ͅR̵̫͆͑ ̸͍̰̯̫̤̤̪̔̆͋͌W̶̺̩̟͔̑̚A̷̹̱̖͖̲͉͖͋͂̉T̶̬̈̊͘C̶̢̛̪̺͆͝H̴̨̞̳͐́ ̷͚͖̜̫̫̞̟̆̆͊Ơ̶̼̺̮̭̹̂̈́̑͆̍͝ͅŲ̶͖̺̗̰̈́̌͝T̷̨̢̺͚̞̪̑͐̿͌͂

TheBreadmonkey, 4 months ago to random

The expression 'work hard, play hard' is a scourge to people of a certain disposition and I remain convinced it was dreamed up by some government think tank.

I did work hard play hard for quite a lot of years and cannot tell you how destructive it is to everyone except those profiting from you.

TheBreadmonkey, 2 months ago to random

When my wife asks me what I'm upto on my phone yet again... I tell her I've taken a little old trip down to...

TheBreadmonkey, 2 months ago to random

One of my friends just said about me....

"You get all of Ben or you get none of Ben. You never get just some of Ben"

I think his point was that I am a lot, but I think I'm going to take it as a compliment.

TheBreadmonkey, 3 months ago to random

I know love is complicated, but imagine being one of the billionaire class - I posit it is virtually impossible that anyone loves them for anything other than their money, making their existence devastatingly sad. Which probably only drives their callous disregard for humanity. They know their hoarding of wealth is like an aggressive cancer to humanity, but they don't care because noone really loves them. I sometimes wonder if all bad behaviour couldn't be resolved if someone responsible took away their toys, gave them a time out then gently told them to stop being so silly and selfish.

Nursery rules for billionaires.

• We are kind to others and don't hurt them.
• We speak to each other - we don't shout.
• We listen to others when they speak.
• We tidy up our toys when we are finished playing.
• We don't hoard all of the Earth's resources so people live in poverty and starve to death.
• We use our walking feet.

TheBreadmonkey, 17 days ago to random

I'm supposed to be working

TheBreadmonkey, 1 month ago to random

Looks like the people at Lidl haven't seen an avocado before

TheBreadmonkey, 17 days ago to random

OK, I will give it to The Star, just this once

TheBreadmonkey, 13 days ago to random

Art

TheBreadmonkey, 2 months ago to random

It annoys me in films when they 'science-up' an ordinary word. Like in Avatar when the humans were on Pandora to mine Unobtainium. Or in the new Matrix when Trinity is held in the area they create the anomalies called.... The Anomaleum. You can't just add an ium/eum to the end of things to make it a thing. Where do I keep my fruit? In the bananaeum. Oh I need to wash the floors, I'll use some of this floorium cleanium. IT'S STUPID.

TheBreadmonkey, 2 months ago to random

I am supposed to be working, but instead I've fallen down an internet rabbit hole of people arguing about whether they wash their legs in the shower or not.

TheBreadmonkey, 1 month ago to random

The one thing that's frustrating about Mastodon is that it's difficult to tell if anyone saw an aurora last night

TheBreadmonkey, 4 months ago to random

'Sup, 'erb owl?

TheBreadmonkey, 5 months ago to random

Boost this if you're not keen on horrid people ✌️

TheBreadmonkey, 4 months ago to random

Dear customer. Please be advised we have completed a thorough and exhaustive review of your post and have upgraded your fave to a boost. I trust this is satisfactory but should you have any questions or require any further information please do not hesitate to contact us. Kind regards.

TheBreadmonkey, 5 months ago to random

I'm giving up and acknowledging Solstice as a thing. Only because I worked out a name pun. Happy Solstice everybody. Whatever that means. May the sun gods grant you all antlers. Or the moon gods turn you into woodland folk. I'm pretty sure it involves something like that.

TheBreadmonkey, 2 months ago to random

"People on Mastodon will boost anything if it's attributed to Carl Sagan"

• Carl Sagan, The Da Vinci Code

TheBreadmonkey, 5 months ago to random

Just a reminder that No Context Brits is a scraper account - ie. they steal other people's posts without credit, to monetise their following. I discovered this when I saw several of my posts posted as original content on their account to millions of likes, which I didn't like very much. If I could be bothered, I would set up an account called something like Brits Out Of Context and just re-post everything they posted, then turn it into a book, and there would be nothing they could do about it. But I'm not that petty. Or AM I.......

TheBreadmonkey, 5 months ago to random

Seasons commiserations

TheBreadmonkey, 2 months ago to random

Republicans are so weird

TheBreadmonkey, 2 months ago to random

Weird flex for his first Fedi post