andymoose

andymoose, 4 months ago to random

“Anti-shark cages have worked well at keeping divers safe - we ask, are they still necessary and should we stop using them given the risks are now so low?”

andymoose, 4 months ago to random

Waiter: your meal sir

Customer: are there peanuts in this? I’m allergic to peanuts

Waiter: you can’t live in fear. Are you going to avoid peanuts for ever? YOU HAVE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE

andymoose, 29 days ago to random

How soon before Windows 11 has ads after every powershell command.

C:> mkdir test

%% Enjoy Diet Pepsi %%

C:> _

andymoose, 3 months ago to random

Been doing some insurance work and all policies now have exclusions for any Covid related issues now, so good luck everybody!

andymoose, 8 months ago to random

I wonder if there were “weirdos” in John Snows time who boiled their drinking water after the discovery of water borne disease and everyone else was all “are you going to drink clean water for the rest of your life?”

andymoose, 3 months ago to random

#CDCSays it is no longer necessary to dispose of the One Ring in the fire where it was forged.

andymoose, 11 months ago to random

Social experiment: designate some hospitals as “N95 mask mandatory” and others as they are now, “bring-your-own-pathogen, let it rip, lick the toilet seat” hospitals. See which hospitals are the preferred choice by the majority of people seeking medical assistance.

andymoose, 8 months ago to random

I won’t lie, seeing @pluralistic fully masked giving a talk and not giving any fucks while doing it was a real confidence boost.

andymoose, 7 months ago to random

Approach to cholera by world governments as if it was COVID: we are working on new vaccines and treatments, please continue to drink the sewage. If you die from cholera we will record it as death by misadventure. Cholera symptoms are mild. Anyone found trying to clean the water before drinking it will be arrested for creating a panic. Everything is fine. It’s seasonal now.

andymoose, 7 months ago to random

“When Biden gave a maskless speech last year at Richard Montgomery High School during a period of high Covid transmission, gym windows were removed to rig a temporary high-end ventilation setup. Parents at the school were outraged”

Fascinating read about how the rich and powerful are taking all the precautions available while we are lied to.

From: @crowgirl
https://hachyderm.io/@crowgirl/111268228730636590

andymoose, 3 months ago to random

Interviewer: Why not reinstate real mask mandates in health care?

Minister of Health: It would hurt the economy

I: How exactly would this hurt the economy?

MoH: ….LOOK A SQUIREL!

andymoose, 6 months ago to random

To the ableists and minimizers out there, let’s try exercising your empathy muscles a little. Imagine you are out there doing your ableist things, living like its 2019 and BAM cancer diagnosis. It’s treatable with chemo. You start treatment. You are told your immune system is now essentially useless for a while. How pissed off are you that no one gives a fuck about you anymore - you are told to stay at home if you are vulnerable to infection. You can’t do anything or go anywhere now.

andymoose, 7 days ago to random

NYT: "We haven't seen a case of cholera in decades, is it time to go back to drinking sewage?"

andymoose, 5 months ago to random

Everyone who went to the Christmas party has covid. No one could have predicted this. It’s delayed my invoices getting paid though so I’m big mad.

andymoose, 7 months ago to random

I hope I can retire before all software dev jobs are just a bunch of MBAs yelling at LLMs.

andymoose, 9 months ago to random

If you are over the age of 40 the correct response to “join us on our discord” is “I don’t have time for that nonsense”

andymoose, 2 months ago to random

I hate the term “covid-cautious” - it’s not a religion, it’s not being “woke” or optional or a lifestyle choice. It’s a reaction to a never ending virus that has been allowed to spread everywhere with zero containment. The fact that people who are trying not to inhale a dangerous pathogen that is now known to cause brain damage as well as a myriad of other life changing conditions are being mocked and treated as if they have a psychological condition is pure insanity. Humanity is fucked.

andymoose, 21 days ago to random

It’s Friday. Here’s to everyone who isn’t living their best life. Who isn’t jet setting off for a long weekend, who can’t drop everything and go anywhere and do anything. To those who are disabled, chronically ill, trapped by the system, trapped at home caring for a loved one, I see you. It fucking sucks. I hope you can find a little time this weekend to do something you like. Whatever that might be.

andymoose, 1 month ago to random

Some days I think about how many cats it would take to win the Iditarod.

andymoose, 6 months ago to random

Can someone recommend a garlic press so indestructible it would take nine companions a year and a gruelling journey to Mordor to destroy it in the fires of mount doom.

andymoose, 1 month ago to random

H1N5 currently has a mortality rate of 53%. Those of you still masking, carry on. Those of you pretending it’s 2019, lol. Best of luck.

andymoose, 1 month ago to random

Bowel: so. Big day tomorrow.

Me: yup.

Bowel: been a while huh.

Me: certainly has. Certainly has.

Bowel: shame if something were to happen.

Me: what do you- oh dear god no.

Bowel: /maniacal laughter/

andymoose, 1 month ago to random

"In the interest of security we have locked down access to JIRA"

fine by me - i'll email you my updates

andymoose, 1 month ago to random

“You do you” is what you tell someone who’s trying to decide what to put on their hotdog. It’s not a pandemic response.

andymoose, 1 month ago to random

“Yeah but what if COVID isn’t that bad and we inadvertently build a healthier society for nothing?” - everyone these days.