@oldladyplays@wargamers.social
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

oldladyplays

@oldladyplays@wargamers.social

Cait is a grandmother, activist, translator (🇫🇷 🇩🇪 🇷🇺 > 🇬🇧), writer, artist, musician, gamer, footy fan, and a bit of a flirt (show me yer shoulders, sweetie!). Transition 11/92, HRT 11/94.

Hugs and flirting welcome. I will never lie about your appearance. #ProudToBeTrans

Striving every day to be anti-racist & equity-based. I have a #PrivilegeJar.

PFP by https://mastodon.art/@SummerKnight

🏳️‍⚧️: trans rights are human rights

YouTube: Historical gaming, war gaming, and FM24

#nobridge

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

futurebird, to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

Seeing their attempts at indoctrination fail to take hold the indoctrinated can only imagine they have been stymied by some equal and opposite form of indoctrination. That we might be sincere about creating the space for each young person to find their own way, to make up their own mind is impossible from their perspective.

That we wait on the outcomes of experiments and study to determine what is best? Just a lie.

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@javierlazarosanz @futurebird

And this is why I live an out life as a trans person these days. Having transitioned 31 years ago, I remind people by my existence that trans people have been around for a lot longer than it might have been obvious.

We were invisible because in those days, the standards under which we were permitted to access medical transition required us to be "stealth" after we transitioned, living entirely pretending to be cis women, cutting all ties with people in your former life, and so on. It was a shattering traumatic way to require things be done, and became (for me) exhausting. I stopped after 12 years, though I maintained my privacy in some contexts.

Just figured that might not be a perspective people here would have.

mekkaokereke, (edited ) to random
@mekkaokereke@hachyderm.io avatar

I've written a letter of support to a judge, but not for a serial rape case. I wrote a letter asking for leniency for a friend that was convicted of trying to buy kilos of cocaine from a cartel. His plug was a federal informant 😖 so Big Fed got him when he went to pick up the first few kilos, just like DeLorean.

My letter worked, my friend got leniency, and what could have been a life sentence, was 4 years.

I'm not saying don't ever write a letter of support. I'm saying understand what it is

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@mekkaokereke

I wrote a letter of support to a judge when I was 15. My father had been killed in an accident, and the person who made the error was charged with negligent homicide. I felt this was egregious, as it was truly an error, and I didn't want to deprive another kid (he had 3) of their father.

So I wrote to the judge and said I didn't think he should be taken away from his kids for a stupid mistake, and would the judge please consider not giving him a custodial sentence if convicted. The sentence was, eventually, probation for two years. I was happy with that.

Radical_EgoCom, to random

No class traitors in labor.

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@FinalOverdrive @Threadbane @Marshie @Radical_EgoCom The Dutch military unionized years ago. I have not heard report of their having become an imperialist power as yet.

I don't disagree that unionization of cops is a net negative in every way, and should be thoroughly discouraged. But I don't see how unionization of soldiers would increase the influence of the MI complex in the first place?

Unionized soldiers ask for the same things as other unionized people: they ask for better working conditions, better pay, safety at work, that kind of thing. They're not out there asking for more hypervelocity missiles or whatnot.

The only part of the military that's like cops inherently are the meatheads (aka the Military Police).

Signed,

A veteran

Jorsh, to random
@Jorsh@beige.party avatar

I see people on here still defending their use of Twitter.

Stop frequenting the Nazi bar, especially when the majority of patrons want you to die.

How long do you think it's gonna be before they doxx you?

I don't want to shame anyone but can we please be serious about the Nazi problem?

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@mekkaokereke @emilyk @Jorsh It's another expression of the privilege paradox. Privilege can largely be defined as a set of things that don't happen to a defined set of people. So, for white people, it's rare to be called aside for secondary screening at the airport. For people who are darker, it is common. The privilege comes in not being pulled aside.

This is another example. As racism is a factor, the moderation often "misses" anti-Black racism (sometimes genuinely, sometimes because they are themselves racist, sometimes both). That seeps through and is seen by Black and brown users. But by its nature, it's not targeted at you, so you're not seeing it - the visibility settings are used to make it visible only to the target and the moderators on their instance. If the moderators don't catch it, then it gets through.

And so Black people experience the Fediverse differently than white people, who don't see the problem, quite literally, because it's not put in front of them, and they're not looking for it, most of them.

It's not enough to be not racist. You need to be anti-racist to be on the right side of history.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Today in knowing your queer history: 60 years ago today, the March on Washington took place, the famous event where MLK Jr. offered his dream of equality to the nation.

But what's the queer connection? Well, the person who organized the entire March, looked after every detail of the preparations (including a great sound system, so everyone could hear the speakers). He was Bayard Rustin, an out gay man (in the early 60s! In the Black community!) who was the mind behind the March, but could never be acknowledged as such by society of the time because he was known to be queer. There's a new movie coming out called Rustin (produced by the Obamas' production company), which tells his story. He's been a kind of hero to me as a community organizer, his ability to plan and foresee the needs of a million people at once.

Know your queer history!

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Heyo, stavlets, and welcome. Happy to have you here, feel free to come or go as you please. I don't post a whole bunch, but I try to put some meat on the bone when I do. I try to only boost things with images if they have alt-text, because I have several followers who use screen readers. If I fail at that, do feel free to let me know.

I'm happy to respond to comments in French, German, Russian, or English, and I'll do my best with Spanish and Japanese comments.

Thanks to the lovely and talented @stavvers for the stavlet wave. :)

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Been reading a couple of threads over at @futurebird about feminism and the life of men.

And it's appalling to me how many of the men responding pointed at feminism as the cause of their pain and suffering as men. That feminism had taken away their ability to be manly.

This is only true if your definition of manly includes "oppresses women regularly". Feminism has been a positive for society in many ways, not least being the de-emphasis on strictly segregated gender roles. It is the patriarchy, and men's control of it, which is keeping these men down - the hierarchy placing men who treat women as objects above men who treat us as people in our own right.

It is patently absurd to suggest that feminism is to blame for men's troubles; it is their internal sense of being required to fulfill rigid gender roles, among which is the imperative to dominate rather than be equals with women, that is bringing them pain. Feminism fights against those rigid roles. We're trying to free men from having to set themselves up with blinders on. Feminism fights against the idea that only women who are "fuckable" have value. It is this concept, rather than feminism, which keeps men in the incel community.

JoscelynTransient, (edited ) to trans
@JoscelynTransient@chaosfem.tw avatar

I'm curious, just based on my demeanor or appearance, how old would you think I am? I've gotten some wild guesses before that caught me off guard, so I'm curious how I come across in our little corner of the fediverse.

I'll attach a few photos in a reply in case you've never seen me before.

(Also, please boost! I'd love to get a perspective from folks who don't even follow me)

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@Impossible_PhD @JoscelynTransient @RuthODay @siege

I don't remember the "egg" idea being extant in any notable way when I had my GRS in 2004. That's the most recent trans-related notable day I have that I could pin it down by.

futurebird, to random
@futurebird@sauropods.win avatar

This has mostly been reported as "trans women banned from women's chess" but it's much more sinister. (as if it weren't already.)

ALL trans people are targeted by this ruling. Trans men will be stripped of all chess titles won, which can only be returned to them by “changing the gender back to a woman” (from the ICF’s ruling). ALL transgender chess players will be marked as trans in their files.

If you play or know anyone who does take a stand on this. It's ugly.

https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/international-chess-org-trans-women?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@futurebird @DarLose

What got me about the sad boys was that they were often people who didn't look after themselves much. They didn't dress very nicely, they didn't do a lot of personal hygiene stuff very regularly, and were often not...classically attractive, let us say.

Which is none of it a reason not to have love.

What is, is that they inevitably only were interested in those girls who were conventionally attractive, performed femininity to a high standard, and so on.

So we have guys who if rated by most het women would come in below average, feeling entitled to women who would be by any measure out of their league.

Why? Because people with that level of beauty get much more their pick of whom they want - why should they want some guy who can't be bothered to learn to shave properly, or comb his hair?

It's just kinda funny, is all. They ignore wonderful, intelligent nerdy women right beside them (like you), and yearn for impossible targets, then rail against women for not responding to their overly entitled claims.

BajoranEngineer, to random
@BajoranEngineer@mastodon.online avatar

I got married last week!!

I’m in a purple dress with pearls on my neck and crown and earrings. I’m making a little heart with my pointer finger and thumb. I’m kissing my partner’s cheek. My partner has pearl gauges and gold chain and a tan mesh shirt. She is also opening her mouth. we are two black women.
I’m in a purple dress with pearls on my neck and crown and earrings. Im laughing big and my partner’s hands are up in the air along with her blue suit jacket. My partner has pearl gauges and gold chain and a tan mesh shirt. She is also opening her mouth. we are two black women.
I’m in a purple dress with pearls on my neck and crown and earrings. I’m smiling big and my partner is kissing my cheek. My partner has pearl gauges and gold chain and a tan mesh shirt. we are two black women.

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@BajoranEngineer

How lovely you both are! May you be happy all your days together. :)

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

While standing-to with antifa a few years back (before the plague), I came face-to-face with a guy carrying a Nazi flag. I said to him, "You know, your grandparents" - he was my age - "would be so ashamed of you now, to see you proudly toting that trash."

"WELL I'M NOT A NAZI, BECAUSE THE NAZIS WERE NATIONAL SOCIALISTS, AND I HATE SOCIALISM!"

And I'm like, "wait, dude, your problem with the Nazis is that you think they wanted workers to own the means of production? THAT is where you differ?"

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

On another note, my elder friends, while you're hate-reading my posts, consider this: if you still think you KNOW whether you knew any trans people, I laugh at you. I was stealth for 12 years, no one knew that I didn't want to know.

You cannot "always tell". If you think you are, you're not anyone I'd call any kind of ally.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Hey boomer: the reason you didn't see trans people when you were younger isn't hard to find.

What was your attitude towards trans people?

Yeah, exactly. Why would I have wanted to tell you about myself, when doing so got me ostracised, unemployed, and beaten up?

You wanna find out why you didn't know trans people, look in the mirror.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Realised lately that I really like my life, myself, my body, my whole existence, in a way I never thought I would. It's so satisfactory to feel so complete.

The Member of Parliament that I worked on the petition with (Mike Morrice, Green Party Kitchener Centre) spotted me at the gala I attended last Thursday, and while hugging me, he said he'd been meaning to tell me. Ever since the petition got big, they've been receiving, daily in the office, emails from trans youth all over the world saying how much of a hero I am to them.

I cried right then and there, of course, because estrogen. I never imagined in my wildest dreams as a scared teen that one day I'd be an activist for trans existence, or that people might look up to me for it. (I don't recommend this, by the way, I wear a lot of skirts and you might get to see more than you wanted.)

Yet here I am. And I'll tell you this: they'll take the microphone out of my cold dead hand before I stop advocating for us.

Cis people: if you want to be on the right side of history, come with me.

oldladyplays, to twitter
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Hello, my Twitter-leaving new friends! Lovely to have some new folks following, that's always pleasant.

My tips for enjoying the Fediverse:

  1. Follow hashtags. This is a neat feature of the Fedi, You can literally follow a hashtag.

  2. Follow people who are different from you. Open your world to new ideas and new people. Unlike Twitter, moderation exists here, and the admins and mods do a lot of great work keeping Fedi as safe as possible. You're not likely to accidentally run into a pocket of right-wing fanatics.

  3. Your Home timeline is not algorithm-driven. It picks up all the people you follow, and the hashtags, and puts their posts in chronological order (mostly) in your timeline. This means you're the driver of how busy it is.

  4. Ignore all the people with "you must do this to be Fedi enough" attitudes. Yes, you should use alt-text, and CW, and a bunch of other stuff, but you'll learn that over time, as you acclimate to the culture here. Don't let anyone make you feel unwelcome because you don't know it yet.

  5. Do make an post when you have time. People regularly read that hashtag, and respond to new people.

Enjoy your time here. Follow a bunch of people, and grow from there. And remember our numbers are smaller here - it takes a bit longer to grow your follower numbers, but the engagement is reportedly (by recent Twitter migrants) more effective than Twitter has been in many months.

cyrilpedia, to random Japanese
@cyrilpedia@qoto.org avatar

No. No no no.

No.

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@cyrilpedia

We need to take this to the UN. This is a war crime. Or a hate crime. Or some kind of awful crime.

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@hramrach @futurebird @cyrilpedia

It is, how you say, our national treasure. To see it so changed and yet called "poutine" with no gravy or cheese curds just seems...wrong.

Though I do like that the Wiki has the right pronunciation. Pu-TSIN.

oldladyplays,
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

@jgordon @futurebird @hramrach Last I checked, Quebec remains part of Canada, no? I'm just assuming because of the number of BQ MPs we have... :)

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

I kind of like the idea of a billionaire cage match. Let's do it this way: we take all the billionaires, and lock them together in a cage. Then we turn out the lights and go home, and get on with our lives.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Got some information on a probable job prospect. I've been asked by a local university prof if I'd be willing to be a lab instructor for her course in community organizing. It's well-paid, totals to about 30 hours over 3 months, and I get to teach Activism 101 to a bunch of eager university students. We're planning to do it as a workshop - have the students outline a plan for some action, and build a structure that will allow it to be an advocacy platform for that action.

This is a really cool opportunity, and I'm really looking forward to it.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

The petition I started was presented in Parliament today, which resulted in my name - MY FUCKING NAME - being read into the Parliamentary Record (AKA Hansard) forever. Someone searching Hansard could find my name in it. I am unreasonably nerdily excited by this. Some history grad student will write an essay about this time eventually, and they will find my name in the record, before writing that essay that no one but their prof will ever read. Woo-hoo! I'm FAMOUS!

Anyway, what that means is the government has 45 days to respond. That puts it about two weeks after Pride month ends, which is a pretty good time to be pressing the government on a queer-focused issue.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Ever since I started my undergrad, I'd awaited those hallowed words. I'd heard them call for pilots that way, and doctors, and important decision makers.

But never in my life was I prepared for the day I answered the call: "Is there a linguist in the house?"

MIcrofiction

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Cis people, your turn for attention.

You say you want to be an ally? Prove it. Get and wear a pronouns pin, and a trans flag pin (or button, patch, sticker, whatever) to display on your clothes at all times.

This will have two effects. One, it will show other cis people how many of you are in fact our allies. Two, it will show trans people where our allies are.

Yes, it could be a little bit dangerous to you. How do you think it feels to be visibly trans? Standing up for us needs a certain amount of bravery - the same quality you say you admire so much in us. So now is your chance to show it.

If you were really into it, you'd organize a Day of Pink&Blue or something, to show yourselves to be allies all together on a single day by wearing ribbons or t-shirts or whatever. But I'm not doing it for you. We need you to organize this. Cis Allies Impressing Transes. CAIT.

There, I even gave you a good name for the organization.

Seriously. If you can't find trans flag or pronoun buttons, find a trans-owned printing business and pay them to make them for you. If you can't find a trans-owned one, then donate the money from the buttons to good trans organizations. I can't do all the thinking for you.

Wanna be an ally? Here's your challenge. Step up and take on the signs that mark us, if you dare.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

Just for old times' sake, my petition to allow US and UK trans and nonbinary people fleeing transphobic laws and a potential genocide to claim asylum in Canada? Well, it closes in just under one week. At the moment, we're about sixteen thousand signatures short of the second-most signatures on any Canadian petition to the government. Ever.

So I'm gonna send this around one more time, with the hope that Canadians will see it, sign it, and pass it along. You will need a Canadian address (a real one) to fill out the form.

https://petitions.ourcommons.ca/en/Petition/Details?Petition=e-4268

Disponible en français ici:

https://petitions.noscommunes.ca/fr/Petition/Details?Petition=e-4268

Thanks for your attention; boosts and x-posts to other social media welcomed.

oldladyplays, to random
@oldladyplays@wargamers.social avatar

One of the most bizarre things, in a minute way, about US politics is their love of titles, especially in the press. You get talking heads on TV, and they're always addressed as though they were still in the important positions they once held. So a former Secretary of Defense is called "Mr. Secrretary", and a former Ambassador is called "Madam Ambassador". Governor, Senator, President, you name it, if they held it once, they get (ahem) entitled to the use of that rank/job title forever more.

It's a weird affectation, one we don't generally share in the other English-speaking countries. If Jean Chretien comes on the news, former PM of Canada, he's addressed as "Mister Chretien".

I always think it's funny is all. The egalitarian shining city on the hill, with its devoted fans of democracy and class-consciousness. It's like they're building their own peerage of a sort.

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