Hey fellow Covid Cautious people, how do you deal with overwhelming loneliness and despair? Because, y'know, everyone else is fully capable of dealing with these things and it's just me who doesn't know the one weird trick to coping with an absurd and horrific existence.
Does anyone know a good #discord server related to #autism? I am #struggling to make #friends. I don’t have any and really need #support, someone to #talk to…and have trouble making friends. I’m #lonely and not sure if this would #help or not. I’m wondering if finding a #community would make finding #friendship easier. Thank you in advance.
I think I'm having social withdrawal issues, which is odd as I'm not the most social person in the world. I got used to living in London, which had multiple opportunities for me to head out and hang with people when I chose to do so, which was maybe two or three times a week. The rest of the time I worked form home and kept to myself. Down here in country Tasmania, I don't even have that many chances to hang. I miss it. #lonely#personal
Feeling sorry for myself. I moved to a new place 15 months ago, live on my own and still don’t have people I can just call up to hang out with. It’s hard to find people my sort of age - they’re all busy with their spouses and kids. I’m #lonely. 😔
Not into this holiday because it's not your faith or you are alone? Please share ideas of things we can do to make it a better day and something we can improve on next year, if not today..
Other ideas/feedback needed, please!
Here we go..
.. Virtual truth or dare games (apply ethics, practice safety without identifying where you live, etc) ie: audio clip singing posts, audio clip of asking neighbour for a cup of sugar, do a moon walk, call and old acquaintance/describe the outcome, etc
.. Photo challenges
.. Unique dinner pics
.. Prepare & share scavenger hunt ideas
.. Find, do and share something artistic
.. Share a gratitude list
.. Make/share a goal or bucket list
.. Make & share a vision board
.. Do a Tye-dye challenge
.. Host a zoom party with strangers--use new/emails for privacy
.. Make kindness rocks, photograph where you left them
.. Do a sidewalk chalk challenge
.. Discuss/promote ur favourite artists, musicians, writers, poets, books, etc
.. Have an upcycle challenge and share pics
.. Create an online discussion game: rewrite movie quotes,
.. Share a personal life hack ie I use a pen's pocket clip to old nails in awkward spaces (also safer lol)
.. Discuss time capsule items and bury them at a local beach in a metal container.. Fun for ppl with metal detectors to find yrs later
.. Make a virtual wish tree (thread?)
.. Volunteer challenge
.. Create a movie watching group, use a countdown to all stream at the same time.. Discuss in a zoom mtg, concurrently?
.. Discuss ideas to help someone in your neighbourhood and report back with accomplishments
.. Use secure privacy apps like signal or threema to form friendship groups
Finally! A year after this #hiking day, I decided to finalize the #photos and share the selected one with you. It was a snowshoeing day into the #mountains. Crisp #chill, #lonely, wide, clam, strenuous - just #amazing
I decided for a #blackandwhite version. I feel it transport the #mood the best. Well enjoy the quick read if you like. I'm happy to have this written now
This is a story I did not think I would be continuously updating.
Let's start with a question: How many of you have heard teen boys, or heard teachers talk about, teen boys referring to themselves as "Sigma Males"?
I ask because one of my Baltimore City School teachers is seeing this all the time now in the classroom, and finding TikTok videos of other teachers around the country discussing it.
In brief, a Sigma Male is supposedly a "lone wolf" (loner) who is misunderstood by his community, yet has all the potential of an Alpha Male, and is just absolutely charming to the ladies if he tunes his technique. The problem here is that this all seems connected to the Incel movement and those young men are being trained that they are entitled to young women.
A follow-on problem is that I'm suspecting this is all part of a propaganda campaign to recruit young men to an Incel way of thought.
To the best of my knowledge, the term Sigma Male as a personality type never came out of an actual psychological assessment system. If it did, it has been twisted.
Reading from the bottom of the message below to the top:
Part 1: I stumble across a "personality test" for men on YouTube in which Sigma Males seem too good to be true. Then I discover the channel has gamed the YouTube algorithm by having 10% "personality test" videos, and 90% "how to bag a woman to use" videos.
Part 2: My wife sends me an ad for a romance novel series featuring Sigma Males -- showing this idea is moving mainstream.
Part 3: The high school kids start referring to themselves as Sigma Males.
Once again, we need to be re-doubling programming and messaging that focuses on the value of both community and of women as equals.
Do please see below.
-- Michael Reeder LCPC
TITLE: Return of the "Sigma Male"
A brief update to the story I posted last January (and below) on "Sigma Males", YouTube Algorithms, and the funneling of lonely young men into unhealthy modes of thought.
My wife found the attached photo gem on social media. Its of an entire romance book series entitled "The Sigma Menace: The Complete Series". "In this irresistible collection, wolf shifters break all the rules in the name of passion, love, and claiming their destined mates!"
Great... Do men read romance novels, or has this contamination spread to women too now?
Not sure if the graphic will post here, or at the bottom of the entire message.
The original message is definitely on-topic for the list. This photo... kinda extra.
"Sigma Male" is a bogus pop psychology concept linked with incels and -- perhaps more positively -- helping lonely young men feel better about themselves. But... they are irresistible loners and entitled to women... Not happy to see it going kind of mainstream.
Michael Reeder LCPC
Baltimore, MD
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Originally Published: 01/17/2023
TITLE: YouTube Pseudo-Psychology, Algorithm Traps, and How I Got Set-Up
to Look Like I Cheat
My wife and I share a YouTube Premium subscription. A few weeks ago I was scrolling through YouTube recommendations when I came across a video on different male personality types.
"Sure", I thought, "I'm a therapist -- why not check it out". So I watched the video as it invited me to try and decide which type of male I was as they described them. I noticed they made the "Sigma Male" sound the most attractive -- which was a bit odd -- but I thought little more about it.
A few weeks later (tonight), up popped a video on 10 characteristics of a "Sigma Male". I was curious, so I watched it. They spent the whole video making "Sigma Males" seem like super heroes. Suspicious now, I went to the channel these videos were coming from to look around.
I was displeased to see that 10% of the videos were on male personality characteristics, and *90% of the videos were dedicated to how Sigma Males Get Women.* Video after video of how to bag yourself a blonde or brunette. Yuck.
You can guess where this is going -- now our shared YouTube recommendations list is full of how-to videos on attracting hot women. The uncool thing is I have never watched any such video to deserve this. The really uncool thing is my wife will be spotting this tomorrow. Happily -- she is very understanding and not the jealous type.
Besides -- she can always look at my view history. I'll also be sending her this message. :)
Is there actually a valid psychological theory outside pop psychology including "Sigma Males"? When I Google it, I get lots of pop psychology websites, including something called the "Incel Wiki".
Now I do feel slightly ill.
-- Michael
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
APPENDED NOTE:
I sent the original note above out a few days ago on a national psych listserv and it engendered some relevant psychological discussion on how AI and algorithms effect the mental health of our clients.
Happily my wife thought the note and situation above hilarious (I thought she might).
Part of what was so troubling to me here was the clear funneling process being executed on vulnerable young men on YouTube:
STEP 1: Grab guys just interested in learning about themselves. (Or psychotherapists interested in personality systems.)
STEP 2: Make "Sigma Males" sound like the most attractive type so they are identified with. (Lonely geeks are recast as desirable lone wolf types with all the skills of alpha males.)
STEP 3: Game the YouTube algorithm so the next recommendations are how "Sigma Males" get women. (I decided to bail at this point so I am not going to view what is being recommended. Judging by the fact that "Sigma
Male" connects in Google searches to Incel websites, I shutter to think...)
[It's possible that "Sigma Male" is a term from a legitimate personality system, but if so, its been at least partially co-opted by pop psychology.]
A discussion commenter stated: /"The mental health challenge is to help people become aware of how AI is taking over their lives so that they can manage the AI rather than have the AI manage them."/
My new resolve to periodically create new YouTube profiles to get out of old tracking algorithms is one example of an adaptation.
*People need other ways to escape tracking to get out of boxes* -- like the old BBS (bulletin board systems) that let you read (or not read) every community comment from every poster without algorithms tailoring your newsfeed.
*People need tools to recognize when they are being herded into specific ways of thinking.* Like many of our political silos. Like my original example above of an interest in male psychology potentially leading to Incel-like "education" on how to be a "Sigma Male" who gets all the women.
*Businesses need some government regulation in what tracking they can do -- in all environments, but especially the free ones.* People may need to return to PAYING for their information sources so they themselves are not the product.
Ironically, it was GOOGLE, whose "I'm feeling lucky" button below the search engine field used to take users to a random website somewhere on the Internet.
*We are now in need of actively maintaining personal ways to randomly escape our information bubbles so as to better recognize them.*****
-- Michael
*Michael Reeder, LCPC
#psychology #socialwork #psychotherapy #research #incel #AI
#artificialintelligence #youtube #mentalhealth @psychology@a.gup.pe
@socialwork@a.gup.pe @psychotherapists@a.gup.pe @psychiatry@a.gup.pe
#Algorithms #personalitytests @silos@a.gup.pe #Sigma #SigmaMales #lonely #mentalhealth
It was a cold morning (-10 degrees Celsius / 14 degrees Fahrenheit) but finally I could realize my picture of a lonely tree. Next time, please add some clouds as a counterweight!
Western (European) capercaillie, also known as a wood grouse. Captured from the frozen surface of Lake Inari in northern Finland. We have been cross-country skiing there for a week, sleeping in huts on numerous islands. It was cold and windy, with almost no sun at all. This guy might have been the only bird we saw this week!
This is a story I did not think I would be continuously updating.
*Let's start with a question: How many of you have heard teen boys, or
heard teachers talk about, teen boys referring to themselves as "Sigma
Males"?
*
I ask because one of my Baltimore City School teachers is seeing this
all the time now in the classroom, and finding TikTok videos of other
teachers around the country discussing it.
In brief, a Sigma Male is supposedly a "lone wolf" (loner) who is
misunderstood by his community, yet has all the potential of an Alpha
Male, and is just absolutely charming to the ladies if he tunes his
technique. /The problem here is that this all seems connected to the Incel movement and those young men are being trained that they are entitled to young women./
A follow-on problem is that I'm suspecting this is all part of a
propaganda campaign to recruit young men to an Incel way of thought.
To the best of my knowledge, the term Sigma Male as a personality type
never came out of an actual psychological assessment system. If it did,
it has been twisted.
_Reading from the bottom of the message below to the top:
_ Part 1: I stumble across a "personality test" for men on YouTube in
which Sigma Males seem too good to be true. Then I discover the channel
has gamed the YouTube algorithm by having 10% "personality test" videos,
and 90% "how to bag a woman to use" videos.
Part 2: My wife sends me an ad for a romance novel series featuring
Sigma Males -- showing this idea is moving mainstream.
Part 3: The high school kids start referring to themselves as Sigma Males.
*Once again, we need to be re-doubling programming and messaging that
focuses on the value of both community and of women as equals.
*
Do please see below.
-- Michael Reeder LCPC
TITLE: Return of the "Sigma Male"
A brief update to the story I posted last January (and below) on "Sigma
Males", YouTube Algorithms, and the funneling of lonely young men into
unhealthy modes of thought.
My wife found the attached photo gem on social media. Its of an entire
romance book series entitled "The Sigma Menace: The Complete Series".
"In this irresistible collection, wolf shifters break all the rules in
the name of passion, love, and claiming their destined mates!"
Great... Do men read romance novels, or has this contamination spread to
women too now?
Not sure if the graphic will post here, or at the bottom of the entire
message.
The original message is definitely on-topic for the list. This photo...
kinda extra.
"Sigma Male" is a bogus pop psychology concept linked with incels and --
perhaps more positively -- helping lonely young men feel better about
themselves. But... they are irresistible loners and entitled to
women... Not happy to see it going kind of mainstream.
Michael Reeder LCPC
Baltimore, MD
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Originally Published: 01/17/2023
TITLE: YouTube Pseudo-Psychology, Algorithm Traps, and How I Got Set-Up
to Look Like I Cheat
My wife and I share a YouTube Premium subscription. A few weeks ago I
was scrolling through YouTube recommendations when I came across a video
on different male personality types.
"Sure", I thought, "I'm a therapist -- why not check it out". So I
watched the video as it invited me to try and decide which type of male
I was as they described them. I noticed they made the "Sigma Male"
sound the most attractive -- which was a bit odd -- but I thought little
more about it.
A few weeks later (tonight), up popped a video on 10 characteristics of
a "Sigma Male". I was curious, so I watched it. They spent the whole
video making "Sigma Males" seem like super heroes. Suspicious now, I
went to the channel these videos were coming from to look around.
I was displeased to see that 10% of the videos were on male personality
characteristics, and *90% of the videos were dedicated to how Sigma
Males Get Women.* Video after video of how to bag yourself a blonde or
brunette. Yuck.
You can guess where this is going -- now our shared YouTube
recommendations list is full of how-to videos on attracting hot women.
The uncool thing is I have never watched any such video to deserve
this. The really uncool thing is my wife will be spotting this
tomorrow. Happily -- she is very understanding and not the jealous type.
Besides -- she can always look at my view history. I'll also be sending
her this message. :)
Is there actually a valid psychological theory outside pop psychology
including "Sigma Males"? When I Google it, I get lots of pop psychology
websites, including something called the "Incel Wiki".
Now I do feel slightly ill.
-- Michael
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
APPENDED NOTE:
I sent the original note above out a few days ago on a national psych
listserv and it engendered some relevant psychological discussion on how
AI and algorithms effect the mental health of our clients.
Happily my wife thought the note and situation above hilarious (I
thought she might).
Part of what was so troubling to me here was the clear funneling process
being executed on vulnerable young men on YouTube:
STEP 1: Grab guys just interested in learning about themselves. (Or
psychotherapists interested in personality systems.)
STEP 2: Make "Sigma Males" sound like the most attractive type so they
are identified with. (Lonely geeks are recast as desirable lone wolf
types with all the skills of alpha males.)
STEP 3: Game the YouTube algorithm so the next recommendations are how
"Sigma Males" get women. (I decided to bail at this point so I am not
going to view what is being recommended. Judging by the fact that "Sigma
Male" connects in Google searches to Incel websites, I shutter to think...)
[It's possible that "Sigma Male" is a term from a legitimate personality
system, but if so, its been at least partially co-opted by pop psychology.]
A discussion commenter stated: /"The mental health challenge is to help
people become aware of how AI is taking over their lives so that they
can manage the AI rather than have the AI manage them."/
My new resolve to periodically create new YouTube profiles to get out of
old tracking algorithms is one example of an adaptation.
*People need other ways to escape tracking to get out of boxes* -- like
the old BBS (bulletin board systems) that let you read (or not read)
every community comment from every poster without algorithms tailoring
your newsfeed.
*People need tools to recognize when they are being herded into specific
ways of thinking.* Like many of our political silos. Like my original
example above of an interest in male psychology potentially leading to
Incel-like "education" on how to be a "Sigma Male" who gets all the women.
*Businesses need some government regulation in what tracking they can do
-- in all environments, but especially the free ones.* People may need
to return to PAYING for their information sources so they themselves are
not the product.
Ironically, it was GOOGLE, whose "I'm feeling lucky" button below the
search engine field used to take users to a random website somewhere on
the Internet.
*We are now in need of actively maintaining personal ways to randomly
escape our information bubbles so as to better recognize them.*****
-- Michael
*Michael Reeder, LCPC
Hygeia Counseling Services : Baltimore / Mt. Washington Village location
410-871-TALK / michael(at)hygeiacounseling.com
#psychology <<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/psychology>>
#socialwork <<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/socialwork>>
#psychotherapy
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/psychotherapy>> #research
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/research>> #incel
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/incel>> #AI
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/AI>>
#artificialintelligence
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/artificialintelligence>>
#youtube <<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/youtube>>
#mentalhealth
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/mentalhealth>> @psychology
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/@psychology@a.gup.pe>>@a.gup.pe
@socialwork@a.gup.pe
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/@socialwork@a.gup.pe>>
@psychotherapists@a.gup.pe
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/@psychotherapists@a.gup.pe>>
@psychiatry@a.gup.pe
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/@psychiatry@a.gup.pe>>
#Algorithms <<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/Algorithms>>
#personalitytests
<<https://mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org/tags/personalitytests>>
@silos@a.gup.pe #Sigma #SigmaMales #lonely #mentalhealth
.
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NYU Information for Practice puts out 400-500 good quality health-related research posts per week but its too much for many people, so that bot is limited to just subscribers. You can read it or subscribe at @PsychResearchBot@mastodon.clinicians-exchange.org
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It's primitive... but it works... mostly...
The #nonprofit group #Nanaimo Division of Family Practice (NDFP) were provisionally awarded a City grant on Wednesday, May 15 to help launch a social prescribing pilot project.
2meirlmeirl - for memes that hit too close to home. memes related to mental health, depression, anxiety, and more (tw) (lemmy.world)
!2meirl4meirl - @2meirl4meirl...