@markarayner@mas.to
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markarayner

@markarayner@mas.to

Human-shaped, monkey-loving, robot-fighting, pirate-hearted, storytelling junkie, Mark is an award-winning author of satire and science fiction.

(alt texts: avatar is mark looking worried in a space helmet. The banner is a herd of dairy cattle running away from an invading swarm of UFOs.)

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markarayner, to Cat
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May the Fourth be with you -- edition!

Star Wars stormtrooper holding a grey and very hairy tabby awkwardly
Star Wars sand person holding an adorable black cat with bright yellow eyes

markarayner, to aliens
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They mostly come at night... mostly.

#aliens #newt #spiders #spider #infestation #weird #signs #humor #humour

markarayner,
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@DebR You should know the spiders have figured out how to work the printer

markarayner,
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@DebR @ParadeGrotesque Ah, a legit use for it!

markarayner, to Humor
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The long-crested eagle is sick of your shit.

markarayner, to coffee
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Monday morning services.

markarayner, to Cat
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Welcome to a super nummy ! [sound on!]

a calico cat drinks from a water tap outside, and makes funny "num num num" noises as it drinks

markarayner, to Humor
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Quality ancient history meme!

markarayner, to TimeTravel
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This lacks some critical instrumentation.

markarayner, to Humor
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This works best if you read it like a young Jenny from Forrest Gump: "Honk Jesus Honk!"

Typography: it matters.

markarayner, to Humor
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Happy Friday! [sound on for weirdness]

David Lynch, wearing dark sunglasses, saying: "And if youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu can believe it, it's a Friday again."

markarayner, to GenX
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And don't get me started on the whole no physical menu thing.

markarayner, to Humor
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I don't know how they knew setting this this to Ave Maria would be ten times funnier, but it is! [sound on, or watch once without sound and then turn on the sound, like I did]

Slow motion shot of a man doing a backflip on a bouldery beach and trying to kick a football -- he barely touches it and then lands on his face. It is set to the song Ave Maria.

markarayner, to Cat
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POV: You are a very smol train.
[sound on for effects]

#cat #cats #catstodon #catsofmastodon #humor #humour #modeltrain

A camera is mounted on a model train -- it's coming out of a tunnel and two cats are waiting for it, just their heads in view of the camera. The train pulls past the first, then the second cat. The cat's ears twitch. Just when it seems the train is going to be safe, it is knocked off the track.

markarayner, to food
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An onion relish so good it IS illegal!

Proofreading: it matters!

markarayner, to Cat
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Yay, it's another melodic [sound on]

a cat lies next to the hammers of an upright piano while a human plays it, and eventually the cat paws at the human's hands

markarayner, to Humor
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"Snarky as Pratchet, insightful as Stephenson, as full of scathing social commentary as Swift or Voltaire, and weirdly reminiscent of LeGuin, Alpha Max is the only multiverse novel you need this month, or maybe ever."
~Ernest Lilley, Amazing Stories

https://geni.us/AlphaMax

markarayner, to Typography
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Typography: it matters!

markarayner, to Humor
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Lockpicking difficulty of 30.

markarayner, to coffee
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Oh yes.

markarayner, to fun
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Feeling down? Then you need Bongo Cat!

https://bongo.cat/

markarayner, to Rabbits
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This is the correct response.

markarayner, to SF
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"Hey Bob, I know you've just dropped acid, but could you illustrate the cover for the Easter issue of Space Dorks magazine?"

#easter #sf #sciencefiction #humor #humour #goodfriday #scifi #SFF #pulp #easterbunny

markarayner, to memes
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Timely meme.

markarayner, to Humor
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This is much more calming than the ego mausoleum.

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