heya! i'm havi, a 26. y.o. non-binary european queer.
i read a lot of fic, i have three cats, and i will tweet about queer shit, nerdy shit, neurodivergent shit, and whatever else seems and feels relevant!
starting to realize i've become comfy in my own little niche lmao
Behavior is always a symptom. Granted, sometimes it's not obvious what it is a symptom of.
Trying to control or modify a behavior doesn't fix the underlying problem, and not being allowed to cope often adds anxiety and an identity of being broken or wrong or not good enough or unworthy.
The advice to “fake it till you make it” works if you could succeed at a task but lack the confidence.
However, if you don't have the skills, it's a setup for failure and reinforces the idea that the problem is with you and not skill acquisition.
It can also be used by others as a way to get out of teaching you skills that they don't really know how to teach because they learned them intuitively.
It’s such a weird thing that our society requires people to display such a unique skill set (interviewing) in order to determine whether you can do an entirely unrelated job.
Anyone else get that brain thing where, because they have An Important Meeting sometime later in the day, their brain won't let them do anything else because you might miss it, or be late for it, or somehow fuck it up or forget about it?
For what sort of toots could I use hashtags like #ActuallyAutistic or the previous two I just used?
I Toot quite a bit about me and my quirky way life. But I never really know if I "should" add any ND hashtags as the "silly" things I Toot about are quite normal to me. If that makes sense 🤔...
I'm proud enough, these days, of who I am. But I wonder if and when it would be good to add some of these tags... Maybe it could help connect with other peeps like me 😇.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 213 , Tuesday 28/05/2024
Up at 6m as Mrs S. was back in work today.
Another day of fighting the agoraphobia & losing . The spectre of the world beyond the front door playing havoc with my mind.
Watching others sally forth, both in analog & digital life makes me realise how far I have to go to get better.
I would go to the GP, but the whole thing over the ADHD assessment has badly shaken my trust in them.
Also I am so very aware of the state of the NHS & I feel that I cannot deny other, more worthy souls their opportunity to get medical help.
So chores are done and now I roam the countryside around Boston in the virtual world of Fo4.
I was analysing my current play style & I am being so very logical about it - for no reason. I need to relax & play the game as I encounter it, instead of maximising companion potential or trying to do stuff in a set order.
Got a new stand for the iPad today , gotta get used to the new layout - it’s more comfortable if a little odd at the moment.
Final Thoughts.
Sometimes my autistic nature makes me miss communication cues. I fail to respond in the way folk expect , sometimes say things innocently that are misinterpreted because there are certain rules that I either don’t know or don’t understand.
I am kind by nature & like to see the best in people, I like to compliment folk, often the old adage ‘it’s nice to be nice’ comes into play.
Sometimes I do not recognise the unseen, unspoken edges of what is acceptable, people have blocked me before today for being too familiar too soon.This upsets me a great deal when it happens. Thankfully it has not happened since I got my diagnosis.
Now I know I am autistic I take steps to try & avoid the more obvious pit falls , but sometimes I forget or get a little over enthusiastic & folk bring me up short. Then I back away & something is lost.
I had hoped that my GP would help me find the help I need but they seem disinterested. For now I am on my own.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖