jstatepost, to mtg
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 #BleachBlondeBadBuiltButchBody Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) auditioned for Real Housewives of the Republican caucus at last night's House Oversight Committee hearing.
The hearing was supposed to be about GOP attempts to hold US attorney general Merrick Garland in contempt, for reasons. 🥥
#Congress, #AOC, #MTG, #MarjorieTaylorGreen, #RealHousewives, #HouseOversightCommittee, #TuckersBalls

lowqualityfacts, to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar

Happy Met Gala Monday everyone. It's that time of year when celebrities show up to the red carpet dressed as a bedazzled taco, and brave souls take to the internet to boldly declare "Personally I would never dress like a bedazzled taco".

jstatepost, (edited )
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 Sorry, Mr Facts, bedazzled taco happens to be MY look.
Eye'll thank you to consider the absolute minefield that is fashion before you post any more low quality fashion facts. 🥥
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lowqualityfacts, (edited ) to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar

The Kendrick Lamar and Drake feud explained: People who don't listen to rap are amazed to learn that Kendrick Lamar, one of the most critically acclaimed lyricists in music history, is able to write better diss tracks than Drake, the human embodiment of a JCPenney commercial.

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 Eye assure you, Mr Facts, that Eye would respond appropriately to your post if Eye knew who both Kendrick Lamar and Drake were. 🥥
#KendrickLamarr, #Drake, #LowQualityFacts, #Rappers, #Lyricists, #TuckersBalls

jstatepost, to fediverse
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 Well, Eye've been on this Mastodon part of the Fediverse for about a year and a week now and it's spoiled me.
Eye can't rustle up an once of interest in any other social medium.
Eye AM still looking to find anti-social media, though. 🥥
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lowqualityfacts, to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar
jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 Now is the time for all good platypi to come to the aid of the Platyparty!
PS: How do Eye join the Platyparty? 🥥
, , , ,

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 Eye have always found your posts edifying and entertaining, Mr Facts.
But NOW you have given me the thing that has been lacking in my life: A clear career goal.
Eye am hereby announcing on YOUR Mastodon thread that henceforth Eye am going to be a Platyparty Entertainer.
Eye have finally found my place in the world!
Thank YOU! Eye finally feel like Eye belong!🥥
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lowqualityfacts, to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar

NYPD, finding a bike lock that literally anyone can buy: We have determined that professional agitators have infiltrated the student protests.

NYPD, seeing a discarded pizza box: And we have a strong hunch that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are the culprits.

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 What's the pay like for "professional agitators"?
Should those with heavy college loan debt be considering a career in agitation?
Are any official certifications available to professional agitators?
Must one attend college to become a professional agitator, or are there good online courses available?
Mr Facts, Eye have so many questions. 🥥
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stux, to random
@stux@mstdn.social avatar
jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@stux
🥥 Epic battle of the Titans, Stux.
Now if only there was that much suspense in all these comic book super hero movies nowadays.
Thank YOU for making my 420 Caturday extra special. 🥥
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rebeccawatson, to random
@rebeccawatson@mstdn.social avatar

someone called the cybertruck an "incel camino” and I've been laughing about it for hours

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@rebeccawatson
🥥 Eye'm personally partial to Nutz Truck as a rejected Cybertruck name. 🥥
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jstatepost, to random
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 Sleepy Donald a hit with public.
Satirist Andy Borowitz reveals that the sleeping version of Trump is far more palatable to people than the spoiled brat we're used to seeing.
Even his advisers are suggesting that he's polling better with his eyes closed.
https://open.substack.com/pub/borowitzreport/p/poll-majority-of-americans-prefer
🥥
, , , ,

anathema_device, to random
@anathema_device@bne.social avatar

Revealed: the picture sneaked by employee into a German gallery

Technician, who hung his own picture in an exhibition about art world glitches, has been sacked and given a three-year ban

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2024/apr/13/revealed-the-artwork-sneaked-into-a-german-gallery-by-an-employee-and-the-story-behind-it?CMP=aus_bsky

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@anathema_device
🥥 Eye don't know what Eye like but Eye DO know art!
This unauthorized work hung by an employee in an art museum exhibition is ART, and the artist should NOT have been sacked. 🥥
, , , ,

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@anathema_device
🥥 The punishment of firing and a 3-year ban for the artist is grossly excessive in my opinion, Anathema.
As some paragraphs lower down in The Guardian story point out, after a similar event happened in Bonn, the museum there expressed amusement on social media and asked the artist to come forward.
She did, and she sold her painting for nearly 4,000 Euros. 🥥
#Art, #ArtElitism, #ProtestArt, #Guardian, #TuckersBalls

lowqualityfacts, to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar

I love Pedro Pascal.

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 Additional reason to love Pedro Pascal, Low:
His recent disclosure on YOUR Mastodon feed that he was born and still lives in Arkansas! 🥥
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jackofalltrades, to random
@jackofalltrades@mas.to avatar

I learned a fascinating fact the other day.

It is estimated that during the Roman Empire 20% to 30% of Italy's population were slaves. For the empire as a whole that share was between 10% and 15%.

In these times, even modest Roman households might expect to own two or three slaves.

1/13

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@jackofalltrades
🥥 Just read the mind-blowing comic by Australian Stuart McMillen about Buckminster Fuller's energy insights and Eye wish Eye could share it with everyone on Earth.
It will give you a drug-free mind-blowing experience!
https://www.stuartmcmillen.com/comic/energy-slaves/#page-1
Wish Eye could say Eye was MORE optimistic after reading it. 🥥
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jstatepost, to cars
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 Assistance needed from my Fediverse friends!
What say ye to one of these bumper-sticker ideas for my 2000 Ford Focus with custom peeling paint:

  1. My Other Car Is A Hearse
  2. My Other Car Is A Rascal Scooter
  3. My Other Car's On Blocks
  4. My Other Car's In The Junkyard
  5. My Other Car Is Imaginary
  6. My Other Car Was Lost in the 2008 Recession
  7. She Got My Other Car
  8. If U Can Read This, Watch For Falling Parts
    Or,
  9. Why Are You Staring At My Rear End?
    🥥
    , ,
lowqualityfacts, to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar

That's crazy.

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 Moreover, a lion will bring you down immediately with a bite to your neck while a Chihuahua can spend hours gnawing at your heel. 🥥
#FactsOfLowQuality, #Lions, #Chihuahuas, #Hunting, #Nature, #TuckersBalls

gwire, to random
@gwire@mastodon.social avatar

Closed source software doesn’t have backdoors.

It does have “undocumented administrative features” and “development tools mistakenly enabled in production”, but not backdoors.

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@gwire
🥥 Closed source software has backdoors as a feature not a bug. Change my mind. 🥥
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jstatepost, to internet
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 Just asking: Has everyone on social media just given up on the difference between lie and lay and nobody told me? 🥥
, , ,

TonyStark, to random
@TonyStark@progressivecafe.social avatar

I’m not sure where I’ll be watching election coverage right now but it sure as fuck won’t be anywhere foolish enough to have Ronna McDaniel on as a commenter or analyst or whatever they’re going to call it.

Seriously, what the fuck? Why do the major news organizations hate truthful information and honest reporting so much?

What a Coup! NBC News Just Hired Ronna McDaniel. – Mother Jones
https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2024/03/what-a-coup-nbc-news-just-hired-ronna-mcdaniel/

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@TonyStark
🥥 Effin Ronna Romny McDaniel, Tony! 🥥
, , ,

jstatepost, to random
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 Note to Letitia James:
Grab him by the Mar-A-Lago! 🥥
, , , ,

qurlyjoe, to random
@qurlyjoe@mstdn.social avatar

People are fucking brilliant. Got it from my brother, who got it from someone else. I’d credit it if I knew who did it.

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@qurlyjoe
🥥 You absolutely made my today, QurlyJoe, with this remake of the 2 girls and a boyfriend with wandering eyes meme.
Left and right: 2 girls. One at left has Putin's head, one at right has Hitler's head.
Center: An adjudicated rapist, business fraud, and insurrectionist who's been indicted on 91 criminal charges as the boyfriend. 🥥
, , , , ,

lowqualityfacts, to random
@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social avatar

Uh oh, Joe is thinking out loud again.

jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@lowqualityfacts
🥥 Eye've got 5 bucks right here, Low, that sez Joe Rogan really said that about meatballs and pasta. 🥥
,

jstatepost, to random
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 "But Biden is old," is the "But Her Emails," of the 2024 election.
It's a made-up talking point about a non-issue that's supposed to make us ignore damning facts about his unacceptable opponent.
Pleez don't be sucked in by the ill-intentioned propaganda. 🥥
, , , ,

jstatepost, to ai
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

🥥 "Donald Trump supporters have been creating and sharing AI-generated fake images of black voters to encourage African Americans to vote Republican."
"The co-founder of Black Voters Matter, a group which encourages black people to vote, said the manipulated images were pushing a "strategic narrative" designed to show Mr Trump as popular in the black community. 🥥
#Voting, #AI, #BlackVoters, #Trump, ##2024Election, #AfricanAmericans, #TuckersBalls
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-68440150

tantramar, to random
@tantramar@nojack.easydns.ca avatar

Bought a thing; assembled it. An electronic component that shouldn’t have been dangling… was. Obvious solutions elude me. Missing part(s)? 🤷‍♂️

Nothing in the manual. Manufacturer’s website:

— no relevant info
— support chat won’t load*
— support email form won’t submit*
— phone says “US” (I’m in 🇨🇦). Call it anyway; nice lady asks if I bought from them directly. No, via 🇨🇦 retailer. “You have to call them.”

So many chances to do the right thing, all deftly avoided.

  • in either Safari or Firefox
jstatepost,
@jstatepost@mstdn.social avatar

@tantramar
🥥 Welcome to Customer Service 3.0, Christopher -- late-stage capitalism edition. 🥥
, ,

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